Strawberry Fields

How much would it take for you to walk away?

33 posts in this topic

Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

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Hi

However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

What is up with some guys? you would have thought that the girls they get via paying for it are far better than they could if they actually tried to pick them in. So whats wrong with a bath and mouth wash?

Walking out - well I would have walked on you if it was the other way around.

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Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

I suppose it depends on how you said it. If you said "would you like your money back?", then you could hardly be surprised if he - took - his -money - back.

If the guy has just been told that his breath is so monumentally disgusting that you spent 4 hours across a dinner table thinking about nothing else; and that he needn't bother trying to rectify it by brushing his teeth/gargling mouthwash/eating mints etc because it's too despicable for any of those measures to work.... I would imagine he'll be a bit off balance. No matter how diplomatically you put it...

So under the circumstances I don't think he's likely to be in a state to be thinking about computing a "fair" division of the cash to cover the time you've spent. In all likelihood, the moment you offered him the money back, he was grateful just to get you out of the room to terminate his embarassment.

If you were expecting him to pay for the time you spent obsessing over his halitosis, you should have made it clear in the way you offered "a refund". If you didn't, then a refund is a refund.

Oh, and on the "it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated", that's arguable. Even if you're right, it's certainly your own fault if you spent 4 hours being wined and dined by the man before bothering to tell him.

WGs on this forum are always telling punters that, if a girl's a minger and yet they don't walk straight away, subsequent dissatisfaction is nobody's fault but their own. It works both ways, you know!

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Really tough situation. (Anybody who believes long standing halitosis is cured by diligently brushing the teeth on a single occasion is over optimistic.)

But yes should "have bitten bullet" much earlier, and told the guy you couldn't go through with the appointment. Easier said than done.... sympathy to you... as I "said" before... its a really tough situation to deal with.

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Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

I would have left straight away. How on earth could you eat dinner if the smell was wafting across the table ;)

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I also would have called a stop to the appointment in the first 15 minutes if I wasnt happy to go through with it. Hind site is a wonderful thing but in my earlier days of escorting I had a problem with an overnight and I too called a halt after so many hours, now I only do overnights with people I have met on a shorter booking beforehand. Put it down to experience and forget it now, you did the right thing giving the funds back.

Shelly

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Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

I can't say I would have terminated the appointment.

To be honest people have different ways of dealing with problems as they arise, It would I suppose depend on how strong your stomach is.

I have a fairly high tolerance for bad breath, so can't really say I would have terminated the appointment, though I would most definitely take DFK off the menu.

Smell I can deal with taste is another matter.

Had I terminated the appointment, I would have offered a more than reasonable refund, not a full one.

I would however refunded the majority of the clients money, and take enough to cover my expenses.

As that would be where, I upheld the agreement until.

I would have terminated before dinner, or at least told the gentleman that due to the seriousness of his breath I could not continue.

So having done that before dinner I would be entitled to travel expenses as I had travelled in good faith.

Had I gone through with dinner then told him as you had done, being fair I would only have taken travel costs, however I would feel that I had wasted some of my time that could have been a paid encounter.

But as it was my own fault and choice to accompany him to dinner knowing that I possibly wouldn't continue after that fact I would not see that as the client at fault, and therefore he shouldn't be out of pocket.

You went to dinner knowing the problem therefore other than possible travel expenses you are at fault.

You could argue that an escort is paid for time and companionship, and in that respect you did accompany him to dinner, however you did so knowing that you might cancel, so in that respect that would be dishonest.

You did the right thing in refunding his money, and you have learned a lesson that prevent further situations arising, and sometimes that is all you can do in this job.

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I've learnt the hard way with one of my first clients being incredibly smelly that I would not go through with it again. In this case, if I had been more confident I would have taken control and he could have sorted it out very easily. I was just too green. With a situation like yours, where it was evident it couldn't be put right simply, I would have likely put it to an end at point of payment and apologised, but not take the money.

It's so hard when it is a problem that they are having to live with and may not have much control over. He may not have even realised how bad it was until you said it. Let's hope he goes to the Doc's and get's it sorted out as it must be awful for the people that live and work around him.

Your situation does reinforce my feeling that I don't think I would agree to do an over night unless it was with someone I had met previously. There is just no way of knowing about something like that without having met before.

Fingers crossed, to date other than the when I first started, I've never had any problems and been very lucky with the people I have met.

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What is up with some guys? you would have thought that the girls they get via paying for it are far better than they could if they actually tried to pick them in. So whats wrong with a bath and mouth wash?

Walking out - well I would have walked on you if it was the other way around.

what would mouthwash had done? mouthwash is pretty pointless when it comes to bad breath, and stuff like listerine makes it worse

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One of those situations it's easier to do better in retrospect?

The OP feels hacked off, but no doubt the client did as well. We don't actually know his side. He could have gone to considerable time and costs over and above the booking fee. Maybe he cancelled other appointments. Maybe he stayed at a better hotel than he would have done normally. Maybe he had been intensely looking forward to it and felt gutted by the cancellation. Giving the WG part of her fee back maybe simply didn't occur. Maybe it would have felt messy. Or maybe he was impressed with her gesture and felt it was the polite thing to do to accept.

It was perhaps the opposite of a win-win situation. Both parties feel rightly aggreived. But if they got out of it pleasantly and politely that's something.

Did the OP explain it was because of the halitosis? Reason I ask is that I was chatting about this after a delightful booking with a girl yesterday. We'd enjoyed a wonderful time, very open with each other, and she stayed for drinks for some 45 minutes afterwards. I put it to her that one of the advantages of seeing an escort is being able to indulge all the positive emotions (ie GFE) without any worries about them being real. But one of the downsides is that, since you don't have the normal rows that occur in relationships, no-one ever tells you if you have bad breath, bad underarm odour, or any other correctable personal faults. In relationships, these things often get thrown about during arguments. (It probably applies mostly to medium length relationships - short ones it's not worth offending someone, and long ones it can be too difficult. Bertrand Russell, one of the greatest minds of recent times, never told his wife he couldn't kiss her due to her bad breath.)

Only the OP on here knows the specific situation. But theoretically, establishing intense goodwill at the end of the appointment could have laid the basis for a friendly exchange that would have brought such problems into the open.

The reason for my post is two-fold. 1) to offer some small moral support as far as I can to the OP and suggest her instincts were good, even if the result was far from perfect. And 2) to balance things by suggesting we don't know what the client was going through. The OP put her point well, and with frank self-exposure, which I compliment her on. (I'm sorry to say this, but I mention this now since if I am attacked by one of the two rather 'gobby' posters on the board I shan't dignify insults with further contributions to the thread.)

Good luck with future overnights, if you accept them. The girls have given lots of good suggestions and hopefully you won't have such a horrible (and unrecompensed!) ordeal again. ;)

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Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

He took the whole of the overnight fee and you gave it him? I would have flatly refused. He couldnt expect you to drive 160 miles spend 4 hours with him nothing and put you in a situation which is out of your control. I'm sorry but guys like this need a good shaking. I'm positive he knew how bad his breath was. I've always found in the past punters with bad breath realise how bad it is and avoid trying to kiss me as they are embarrassed. When I did overnighters I used to ask for half the money upfront paid into my bank account because once I accepted a booking and the guy got me to drive to Ipswich and once I got there he was high on drugs and I had to spend the whole of the evening with him off his face when all I wanted to do was go home but because it was so far to travel I felt obliged to stay. I only accepted overnighters after this from boys I had met before. This is bang out of order to take the whole fee back and I'm wondering if he might do the same to another lady. In reality he had 4 hours of free time. Maybe worth getting back in touch with him to say you are not entirely happy. Other than that I'd name and shame him if it were me.

Linzi

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If the person had a bad breath issue, im sure he would have been told of this before, and was in the wrong for not informing you of the fact he had halitosis.

The fact you shared a meal with him, made him think everything was okay, it must have occurred to the guy you had travelled far to see him and would expect to get travel expenses, I would suggest you contact the guy again and explain in an e-mail about the reason you cut the booking short, and say you would like your travel expenses to be covered, at the very least.

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I have sympathy for the guy in this case, in that he probably didn't realise it at the time, I have sufferd the same fate, even going as far as posting a FR after a meeting stating that though the lady was excelent, didn't think FK was on the menu.

When I next booked her (the Lack of FK wasn't a problem), this came up. And she did tell me that she could smell beer on my breath ,I had a heavy night before, and though I did brush teeth ect it had failed to get rid of all the smell. I was completely oblvious to this. Anyway I did add my own rebuttal to my own FR, she was too polite to do so herself, and in away I am glad this did happen as I do abstain from too much beer the night before a booking now, and also have a bottle of mouth wash in the glove compartment, I too used to think Mints only would do the trick

As for the OP being right or wrong, I would have said I hoped she gave him the option of carrying on, but with no kissing, but being as she says she could smell from across the table, then I don't blame her. Certainly as been said before, don't think many guys would have carried on if the other way round.

He is lucky to have his money back(all of it was too much in my opion) so hopefully can do it again when he has sorted his problems out.

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Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

Yes this was a disaster for both of you. Horrible situation for you. From what you say his problem was so bad, it could not be put right on the evening, no matter what.Therefore this issue should have addressed before dinner and both have gone your separate ways. Much more difficult to bring it up after dinner and drinks, four hours into the proceedings. At that stage maybe he thought you were ending the evening for other reasons -- could have been a lot of things running thru his head. If he accepted that his problem was serious and irreversible on the evening then he should certainly not have let you go home empty handed.You had set aside the time and were willing to fulfill your side of the bargain -- his side is to be clean and respectable and he failed.

Did he accept what you said as being true ?

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or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

Well if it was me, I wouldn't have known so I'd be quite horrified to find out in that way ;)... I'd still much prefer to be told though, rather than for you to grin and bear it.

As others have said, you should really have told him much closer to the beginning of the booking. It is difficult though, as you never know how badly they are going to take it and you're in a vulnerable situation if they do take it badly.

As for the refund, I'm not going to lie, if offered, my snap judgement would have been to accept it. If you hadn't offered, then I would have asked and would be annoyed if you'd charged much more than travel expenses... we wouldn't pay if it really was just for time and company after all :D:D

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Hi

I've noticed a similar thread from the other point of view, but I was wondering what it takes for a WG to walk away from a booking? Obviously, I understand if the guy behaves inappropriately then this would be the end of a booking for most WG's. However, what's the limit when it comes to personal hygiene?

The reason I ask is, I recently had a complete disaster of an overnight booking. This is not the first time I've encountered BO or bad breath but it was certainly one of the worst. It involved significant travelling (3hour round trip) but on meeting at the hotel I immediately realised this guy had a serious halitosis problem. But then how can I come out and tell him immediately? So then before you know it we're going out for dinner and all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table! I felt especially bad since he generally seemed a decent person in all other areas. However, I honestly could not get past the serious case of bad breath....this would not be solved by brushing teeth/mouthwash/mints! When we returned to the hotel room I deliberated for a short while before biting the bullet and going for the honest approach. Obviously, this was particularly difficult but I thought honest was the best policy. I was really apologetic and tried to be as sympathetic as possible. Being polite I offered a refund, however was rather disappointed when he took the full overnight fee back, despite me having spend 4hours with him and having driven c. 160 miles there and back. Therefore, I was completely out of pocket, despite accepting the booking with the best of intentions and it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated.

What I would like to know is, what would you have done in the situation as a fellow WG? or how would you have reacted to my attitude as a punter?

As a punter you would be embarassed but that should spur you to seek treatment. Even for me as a punter, It would be impossible to punt with a WG with bad breath and i wonder why punters neglect themselves this much and bad breath is hard to bear you know!

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To be fair - on bad breath

If your unfortunate enough to be on a LOT of painkillers especially one often prescribed that has codeine in it

them you will (maybe for the first time in your life ) get awful breath

I know I have been on these for about 14 weeks (since leaving hospital) and I for one am very conscious of it

Now some punters possibly would'nt be so aware

Luckily Im all but off them now and I cannot wait to lose the side effects of bad breath and constipation (I went 15 days without going)

Its life it happens so maybe it was due to that

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I went 15 days without going

I bet when you finally did go it was a dump that a T-Rex would have been proud of :):D :D :D

On the subject of halitosis, I used to work with a guy that hadnt cleaned his teeth since about 1977 (no joke, he claimed it made his gums hurt :cool:) and he stunk to high heaven.

One day whilst working in a confined space he yawned and I had to hold my breath or risk vomiting cos the smell was that bad.

Yet despite all that............he was married ;)

The habits of some people just beggar belief!!!

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Me again!

Well thanks for all your replies. Pleased to see that perhaps my actions weren't so terribly awful.

As for telling the guy sooner... what do you do when within 5 mins of meeting we've left the hotel and got a taxi to a country pub where he's booked a table, you can't exactly leave then? Everything moved so quickly in the beginning. Plus, it's not the sort of thing you can just blurt out...I obviously feel bad for embarrassing him like that. Also, in that time I am still trying to assess that it is definitely a bad case of halitosis. It was so bad I was at first convinced it must be something else!

Also, when it comes to the refund there were other reasons for offering it on my mind. Feedback on the other site is just so unfair. I currently have 100% feedback and several good FRs, therefore if I were to take expenses out of the money before I gave him a refund I wasn't sure if he would leave (in my view) unfair negative feedback. I used to have a different profile on the other site but had to change it after seeing a particularly spiteful client who wasn't happy with the feedback I gave him. Whilst it was perfectly nice and complimentary, it wasn't completely OTT and gushing about how fantastic he was... he took this to mean I didn't enjoy myself and this spiralled into a complete disagreement! Therefore I am particularly wary when it comes to jeopardising my feedback.

I think hindsight is a wonderful thing! I'm not especially hung up about it.... just wondered what other people would've done in that situation.

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If you were expecting him to pay for the time you spent obsessing over his halitosis, you should have made it clear in the way you offered "a refund". If you didn't, then a refund is a refund.

Oh, and on the "it not actually being my fault for the booking being terminated", that's arguable. Even if you're right, it's certainly your own fault if you spent 4 hours being wined and dined by the man before bothering to tell him.

WGs on this forum are always telling punters that, if a girl's a minger and yet they don't walk straight away, subsequent dissatisfaction is nobody's fault but their own. It works both ways, you know!

Just to put you straight... I didn't spend the evening "obsessing" over his halitosis. I am a nice person and it is a very awkward situation to be placed in... you try telling someone you have only just met that they have terrible breath!? Saying that I spend hours being wined and dined before "bothering" to tell him.... thanks for your input but you clearly have no idea what is going through a girls mind at that point. As I've stated in my last post, he booked a restaurant a good 15 minutes drive from the hotel... I couldn't just up and leave. Perhaps you think I should've tried broaching the subject mid meal?

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In response to Tammy, your view that you wouldn't have terminated the booking but would have withdrawn DFK is a scenario that I did try to envisage on the night. However, when I meet someone for a booking I really give it 110% and would feel odd not kissing. I don't think I could've got into the meeting without that intimacy and I don't take on a booking I can't fulfil to the best of my abilities. I feel that is unfair on the client and could leave them feeling disappointed with the booking.

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Maybe Gaz up north will find himself in hospital one day on painkillers that clog up his digestion and make his breath like something awful

Maybe he hasnt been in hospital if so hes lucky Ive been for 14 operations yet I feel lucky having seen what I have seen in our so called wonderful NHS

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Just to put you straight... I didn't spend the evening "obsessing" over his halitosis.

Really?

all through the meal I'm thinking what the hell am I going to do!?....it was so bad you could smell it about 4 ft away across the table!

Forgive me if I offended you, but - just to put you straight - I was merely taking you at your word.

Perhaps you think I should've tried broaching the subject mid meal?

Maybe. Maybe not. But by not doing so till you'd been in his company for 4 hours, you almost certainly made it worse for both him and yourself when you finally did tell him.

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Yes this was a disaster for both of you. Horrible situation for you. From what you say his problem was so bad, it could not be put right on the evening, no matter what.Therefore this issue should have addressed before dinner and both have gone your separate ways. Much more difficult to bring it up after dinner and drinks, four hours into the proceedings. At that stage maybe he thought you were ending the evening for other reasons -- could have been a lot of things running thru his head. If he accepted that his problem was serious and irreversible on the evening then he should certainly not have let you go home empty handed.You had set aside the time and were willing to fulfill your side of the bargain -- his side is to be clean and respectable and he failed.

Did he accept what you said as being true ?

Why can you not tell us about his reaction and understanding of the situation ?

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Cumandgo....

Of course I can tell you his reaction. He was obviously quite embarrassed, as anyone in that situation would be. I asked if anyone had mentioned it previously, he said not although didn't imply that he didn't believe me. He appeared rather let down, but apart from that it's hard to tell as people often mask their true feelings.

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