Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
turboguy

Punting Dilemma How Do I Stop?

13 posts in this topic

I am posting on the back end of a semi bad punt. To be honest the feeling of punting fills me with guilt, shame, yet fondness.

And these emotions are both contradictory and disturbing in their own right.

I’ve met some lovely women over the past years and have become regular friends with some.

But this is the problem. I’ve attracted and made friends with the people that I want to stay away from.

It's like being mates with your local drug dealer in someway. You like them but at the same time you know they are temptation.

If I want to get away from punting scene I’m going to have to ex the whole community and that includes this site, the other site and anything connected to do with punting.

That’s a shame because I would still like to keep in contact with people.

It’s like someone going to an AA meeting and off to the pub.

I can’t drink normal and I can’t punt normal. The only way I can ever do anything normal is by staying well clear of it.

What should I do, because the money I’ve spent over the years is horrific and I want to get myself as a person back. So that I can form relationships with Women again.

Because at the moment it’s to easy for me just to pick up the phone and see an escort and not bother trying to date at all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You seem to know yourself quite well, and you seem to know what to do.

Main thing really is trying your hardest not lapse back into the easy old ways when you're feeling low. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You seem to know yourself quite well, and you seem to know what to do.

Main thing really is trying your hardest not lapse back into the easy old ways when you're feeling low. ;)

Even sometimes when I,m not low I lapse. I get the urge and I want to be with a woman.

I don't have a partner and I have urges like any other person.

I crossed the line from watching a bit of porn to engaging in a life or adult pleasure seeking.

It's difficult to never go back. And sometimes I lack the strengh to say no.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Even sometimes when I,m not low I lapse. I get the urge and I want to be with a woman.

I don't have a partner and I have urges like any other person.

I crossed the line from watching a bit of porn to engaging in a life or adult pleasure seeking.

It's difficult to never go back. And sometimes I lack the strengh to say no.

Same here. I do try and have some really intense and elaborate masturbation sessions now instead. Totally guilt free and zero chance of catching anything too! (and as good as free usually!).

It is hard once you've tasted the forbidden fruit, and there's as good as no support for us as it's not an acceptable addiction in society. It angers me that if I was a heroin addict or a useless alcoholic I would be in line for some sympathy, but because I'm hooked on women and sex I'm just a dirty pervert.

Be strong mate and try and find a good woman. The desire for buying easy sex will always be there, but you have to learn to not go there as in the long run it's not worth it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Same here. I do try and have some really intense and elaborate masturbation sessions now instead. Totally guilt free and zero chance of catching anything too! (and as good as free usually!).

It is hard once you've tasted the forbidden fruit, and there's as good as no support for us as it's not an acceptable addiction in society. It angers me that if I was a heroin addict or a useless alcoholic I would be in line for some sympathy, but because I'm hooked on women and sex I'm just a dirty pervert.

Be strong mate and try and find a good woman. The desire for buying easy sex will always be there, but you have to learn to not go there as in the long run it's not worth it.

it's not easy, I've been giving up for 20 years. I've even punted on a stag night, for one of my weddings, and on honeymoon.

Every year I tried to give up, I tried monthly, by not visiting forums such as this, now I try weekly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I can’t drink normal and I can’t punt normal. The only way I can ever do anything normal is by staying well clear of it.
Hi mate, this implies that you have had some sort of drink problem in the past. Based on your description of yourself, it sounds like you have an addictive personality. While you have rightly recognised that you need to go cold turkey, on the other hand, my opinion is that if you do have such a personality, then you will never go cold turkey without some form of support or counselling. Perhaps I am mis-reading the situation based on what is a relatively short post, but the way you describe it sounds like classic impulsive addictive behaviour. If so, it's nothing to be ashamed of, it's just the way you're built, but my view is that it will be exceptionally difficult for you to just stop on your own, without any support at all. I am one of the lucky people in life, that really does not get addicted to things easily, and haven't punted for nearly 18 months, and can pick it up and put it down as and when I feel like it. The way you describe your behaviour does not sound this way at all, so I hope you will heed my advice.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am posting on the back end of a semi bad punt. To be honest the feeling of punting fills me with guilt, shame, yet fondness.

And these emotions are both contradictory and disturbing in their own right.

I’ve met some lovely women over the past years and have become regular friends with some.

But this is the problem. I’ve attracted and made friends with the people that I want to stay away from.

It's like being mates with your local drug dealer in someway. You like them but at the same time you know they are temptation.

If I want to get away from punting scene I’m going to have to ex the whole community and that includes this site, the other site and anything connected to do with punting.

That’s a shame because I would still like to keep in contact with people.

It’s like someone going to an AA meeting and off to the pub.

I can’t drink normal and I can’t punt normal. The only way I can ever do anything normal is by staying well clear of it.

What should I do, because the money I’ve spent over the years is horrific and I want to get myself as a person back. So that I can form relationships with Women again.

Because at the moment it’s to easy for me just to pick up the phone and see an escort and not bother trying to date at all.

It sounds to me like you know what to do.

If you've recognised paid sex as an addiction that is having serious implications on your wellbeing then do it a step

at a time.

Don't say - "I am never paying for sex again", just say "I'll not bother today, maybe watch a DVD with a mate instead",

and before you know it a day becomes a week and a week a month.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There is no reason to feel guilt or shame, punting is not an addiction and you shouldn't be trying to find the strength to say no.

Instead recognise that you are following a basic biological imperative, relish the forbidden fruit and seek the strength to quit revelling in self pity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi mate, this implies that you have had some sort of drink problem in the past. Based on your description of yourself, it sounds like you have an addictive personality. While you have rightly recognised that you need to go cold turkey, on the other hand, my opinion is that if you do have such a personality, then you will never go cold turkey without some form of support or counselling. Perhaps I am mis-reading the situation based on what is a relatively short post, but the way you describe it sounds like classic impulsive addictive behaviour. If so, it's nothing to be ashamed of, it's just the way you're built, but my view is that it will be exceptionally difficult for you to just stop on your own, without any support at all. I am one of the lucky people in life, that really does not get addicted to things easily, and haven't punted for nearly 18 months, and can pick it up and put it down as and when I feel like it. The way you describe your behaviour does not sound this way at all, so I hope you will heed my advice.

I wish I could just stop for 18 months. I think the longest I have been is 5.

Porn doesnt help and I think this is where my problems started. I felt more inclined to act out what I was viewing and Porn Star\Escorts where so readily availalbe online.

If I do like Sciros maybe I can go longer than a month, two, four or tweleve.

I,d just got to stop looking and engaging in all the chat and surfing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I,d just got to stop looking and engaging in all the chat and surfing.

Sounds to me like you need to find some other non-sex related hobbies, to take your mind off it completely. To put this into context, I had a punt last Thursday, I'm still buzzing over how much I enjoyed it, but at the same time I feel sexually forefilled and have no desire to go on another one, I'm much more interested in the start of the Ashes than sex right now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am posting on the back end of a semi bad punt. To be honest the feeling of punting fills me with guilt, shame, yet fondness.

And these emotions are both contradictory and disturbing in their own right.

I’ve met some lovely women over the past years and have become regular friends with some.

But this is the problem. I’ve attracted and made friends with the people that I want to stay away from.

It's like being mates with your local drug dealer in someway. You like them but at the same time you know they are temptation.

If I want to get away from punting scene I’m going to have to ex the whole community and that includes this site, the other site and anything connected to do with punting.

That’s a shame because I would still like to keep in contact with people.

It’s like someone going to an AA meeting and off to the pub.

I can’t drink normal and I can’t punt normal. The only way I can ever do anything normal is by staying well clear of it.

What should I do, because the money I’ve spent over the years is horrific and I want to get myself as a person back. So that I can form relationships with Women again.

Because at the moment it’s to easy for me just to pick up the phone and see an escort and not bother trying to date at all.

There is very little you can do. Why ? Because, I feel from the way you posted that you really dont want to stop.Its too nice and convenient. You have to decide yourself first.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There is very little you can do. Why ? Because, I feel from the way you posted that you really dont want to stop.Its too nice and convenient. You have to decide yourself first.

Yes I know that is the problem.

If I see a nice woman online i,m going to get the urge. And no matter how many times I tell myself no. I know inside of me its a yes and it will happen.

This is why I am torn between the good and the bad.

I got to be stronger.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sounds to me like you need to find some other non-sex related hobbies, to take your mind off it completely. To put this into context, I had a punt last Thursday, I'm still buzzing over how much I enjoyed it, but at the same time I feel sexually forefilled and have no desire to go on another one, I'm much more interested in the start of the Ashes than sex right now.

Agree, you need other non-sex related hobbies. I wouldn't go as far as watching the cricket though :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0