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pinkshirt

Fantasy Vs Reality

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Long time lurker here slowly moving into punting and posting on punting...

I've recently had my first nuru massage and short of pedanticism couldn't complain about the provider, the location or any part of the service BUT nuru was something I'd fantasised about perhaps a little too much and reality fell far short of fantasy.

Reason for posting this is curiosity if this is a common theme that the first time you enact a long dreamt fantasy it somehows falls short of expectations.

Don't get me wrong I reallyenjoyed nuru and may go back, but at the moment punting for me is about trying new things and itd be good to prepare if reality can never meet let alone surpass fantasy.

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I think it depends. My first attempt at Roleplay with a working girl was an utter disaster, as was the second. After that I was more careful with who I picked for it and they got better, though I still haven't found someone who is as into it as I am.

My first Lady Marmalade Party so far exceeded my expectations that I still think back on the first one and shake my head that I actually did all that stuff. I've been nack a few times since, just to make sure I didn't dream it...

My first FBSM also was awesome. I'd wanted to do one for ages, and I was very careful in who I picked. These however are getting better and better the more I go. So much so, that I pretty much just do these and parties now. I haven't done a one to one in a couple of months.

But yes, it is very easy to build something up so high in your mind that it's impossible to meet that expectation. I think some of the well-reviewed ladies, both on the full service and the FBSM boards fall into this trap. People go to see them expecting them to give some transcendental experience, whereas in reality they're real-life ladies who, whilst very very very good at what they do, can not possibly live up to the burden of expectation placed upon them.

Edited by Tibbs

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Well, if you really wanted a girl to bounce on your man bits but had a nuru instead because you were still building up the courage, then maybe it would be a disappointment.

Sometimes you have to try things just to find out if you like them. Other times you just have to be honest about what you want and go for it. Maybe this was the latter?

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Long time lurker here slowly moving into punting and posting on punting...

I've recently had my first nuru massage and short of pedanticism couldn't complain about the provider, the location or any part of the service BUT nuru was something I'd fantasised about perhaps a little too much and reality fell far short of fantasy.

Reason for posting this is curiosity if this is a common theme that the first time you enact a long dreamt fantasy it somehows falls short of expectations.

Don't get me wrong I reallyenjoyed nuru and may go back, but at the moment punting for me is about trying new things and itd be good to prepare if reality can never meet let alone surpass fantasy.

My first Party before which i was shaking like a leaf and nearly didnt go ahead turned out to vastly exceed my expectations and crucially i felt this is my thing thus opening up a whole new punting world of group sex.

So in my experience reality can definately surpass fantasy and even the first time it can depending on what you require and who its with.

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I've recently had my first nuru massage and short of pedanticism couldn't complain about the provider, the location or any part of the service BUT nuru was something I'd fantasised about perhaps a little too much and reality fell far short of fantasy.

I'm interested in Nuru too, but there's no way I'm going to book the first girl that I see offering it and just go along and hope it works...'cos I doubt it will. The girl for me, will have to have a certain body type,a 12/14 and less than 5'5, she will need a large chest 34dd+ and a chuncky arse. Her personanilty needs to be one of an exhibistionist and also a very horny girl. For my part, I will have studied every video I can find on the net, made notes on all the postions that look hot and also worked out how to change between them in a smooth manner, I will probably even write out a running order of exactly how I want it all to go and I will will memorise it. Obviously, once experience has been gain, you don't need to do this, as it will all come naturally!

The above is what I do, in a different manner for gfe's. It's about finding a responsive and sensual girl and knowing exactly how to behave to bring out the best in her. My gfe punts are now going fantasticly well, and I nearly always feel that "chemistry" that makes it special. I don't have to plan a ruuning order, because experience now kicks in and I all of my moves are second nature, I also feel confident in reading the signs that come back from the girl and know what she wants me to do.

I have had some really bad punts along the way too, but in general things are getting better and better and I'm making fewer mistakes. There are some excellent service providers out there and some really crap ones too, you just have to work on being a punter and gain experience....the reallity of it can and will equal the fantasy, if you work at it! :D

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I think this can apply to anything, not just paid for sex. Even real world civvy sex can be a disappointment sometimes. My first few WG experiences were slightly disappointing, mainly BDSM ones, which I had really built up into an amazing fantasy. BDSM is a good example of something that needs a few visits to a provider before you can really get a rapport going.

It's worth saying too that Nuru is a relatively new thing on the UK punting scene and if you had an image of Nuru from watching Japanese video clips then you might be a bit disappointed by the overall experience. However, ladies are improving as they become more experienced.

A lot depends on the WG, her attitude and whether the two of you click or have a bit of a rapport, which often will only develop after you see a WG more than once.

Also, you can only get a real feel for what the 'reality' is like after you've had a few punts.

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'Light' Domination for me.

Booked a lady who does it. The plan was for her to do some domination on me then we would have sex afterwards. But to be honest it was very disappointing.

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Sometimes the reality can indeed exceed the fantasy as was the case with my first ever 2girl booking. Luck and careful planning and research/prior experience and good judgment also help !

Conversely a long lusted after new experience/girl can be a huge letdown too

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Thanks for the great replies, reading others views on various first was intreaguing, never heard of marmalade parties before but after googling I think I'll be adding that to the punting wishlist.

It certainly wasnt the case that i was unsatisfied because I wanted a proper punt as Tom put it, in fact a happy ending was offered and declined as i was just after nuru that day.

I had planned the nuru and masseuse as well though Kid A's preparations put mine to shame, perhaps the old adage of the more you put in the more you get lends itself to punting too. Though I think also you need some punting confidence/experience to lead any punt so that it follows your plan, presumably emailing too many details in advance doesn't go down well? Any suggestions fo a novice here?

Definitely up for a second nuru...

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Fair enough, I was mistaken.

You're right about emailing for details. It's annoying to be bugged by someone for "details" when you have a life to get on with, it's not an easy thing to describe and besides, are you going to complain if the actual meeting doesn't follow the emailed plan down to the last detail? huh.gif

Confidence comes from practice and meeting girls that are themselves confident and friendly. Don't be afraid to let things go away from your plan. Just chill out, have fun, and let the professional do her job, she's the experienced one, but don't be afraid to say if you're not enjoying yourself.

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oh gawd there is nothing more offputting than a client that is working to his scripted plan he has in his head. He might not think it shows but sometimes you do rather expect him to pull a detailed typed up schedule out of his pocket.

I try not to have expectations anywhere in life just so that I'm less likely to be disappointed. I especially try not to have an expectation of what a client may be like when he turns up.

I guess for a lot of people there is just a tendency to overthink things.

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oh gawd there is nothing more offputting than a client that is working to his scripted plan he has in his head. He might not think it shows but sometimes you do rather expect him to pull a detailed typed up schedule out of his pocket.

I guess for a lot of people there is just a tendency to overthink things.

You're talking crap! :D

Do you know what Nuru is? If you do, how did you learn about it? Probably by the same way I did, watching videos..you can't have experience of things you've never done, at the begining it pays to have a good idea of what it is you want...if it looks scripted, so be it, but that's better than having know idea and looking like a lemon!

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no i'm not talking crap, i simply perhaps have a different view than you. Wind your neck in.

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oh gawd there is nothing more offputting than a client that is working to his scripted plan he has in his head. He might not think it shows but sometimes you do rather expect him to pull a detailed typed up schedule out of his pocket.

I try not to have expectations anywhere in life just so that I'm less likely to be disappointed. I especially try not to have an expectation of what a client may be like when he turns up.

I guess for a lot of people there is just a tendency to overthink things.

That would include me then. I have a pre-conceived plan of what i require, it ensures with good WGs that i get it. In my experience not having a plan wastes time especially with newbies to me, if she is a regular that changes my rigidity somewhat. :)

Edited by smiths

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no i'm not talking crap, i simply perhaps have a different view than you. Wind your neck in.

Have you ever been a newbie punter? Do you know what it's like? If I was to give one piece of advice to any newbie, it would be to plan exactly what you want to do with an escort, the first time you see one! Having spoken to many girls who have dealings with newbies, I'm aware how many men struggle to go through with it....if they were to have a plan it would be so much easier. In my work, I have to represent my company and give presentations to potential customers....the idea of not preparing what I'm going to do and say would be unimaginable and make my job a hundred times harder.

when people give out crap information, I like to correct them....so, please wind your neck in :P

Edited by Kid A

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no I have never been a newbie punter but then again have you ever been a working girl?????

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no I have never been a newbie punter but then again have you ever been a working girl?????

The guy who started the thread is a punter and a newbie and is looking for advice! Just perhaps, having been a newbie once myself, I might be able to help...if it was started by a newbie wg, I wouldn't feel qualified :rolleyes:

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You've given a punter's point of view and I have given a point of view from a WG.

Not all WGs will see it same as me, not all punters will see it same as you. That doesn;t mean either of us is talking crap, we just have different viewpoints and opinions. I do, however, stand by the fact that I am not talking 'crap' I am simply stating my view and opinion.

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You've given a punter's point of view and I have given a point of view from a WG.

Not all WGs will see it same as me, not all punters will see it same as you. That doesn;t mean either of us is talking crap, we just have different viewpoints and opinions. I do, however, stand by the fact that I am not talking 'crap' I am simply stating my view and opinion.

I do understand where you're coming from...sex is much better when it's spontaneous and that's how I let my gfe bookings go, but I'm only able to do this now that I have a fair bit of experience. Sex with wgs can be quite a difficult thing for men to get their heads around at first, those that come to you and do things in a scripted manner are probably doing so because they lack confidence...I hope that might help you understand us men a little better :D

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Remember you're having sex with a woman, not giving a Powerpoint presentation. Sometimes it's not best to force things to be your own way, or you'll just be rattling off a list services with a grumpy lady. I don't think anyone wants that?

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What I've learned is that real life punting is not porn. Don't assume that WG's are just copying porn you've seen and know what to do.

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What I've learned is that real life punting is not porn. Don't assume that WG's are just copying porn you've seen and know what to do.

That is a very sage piece of advice.

Also, probably not that many WGs will truly offer the 'real' PSE as depicted in much modern style porn.

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not that many WGs will truly offer the 'real' PSE as depicted in much modern style porn.

not every WG wants to! And you wont even get a GFE either if you try to pester them into a PSE.

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Have you ever been a newbie punter? Do you know what it's like? If I was to give one piece of advice to any newbie, it would be to plan exactly what you want to do with an escort, the first time you see one! Having spoken to many girls who have dealings with newbies, I'm aware how many men struggle to go through with it....if they were to have a plan it would be so much easier. In my work, I have to represent my company and give presentations to potential customers....the idea of not preparing what I'm going to do and say would be unimaginable and make my job a hundred times harder.

when people give out crap information, I like to correct them....so, please wind your neck in :P

I'm sure she'll also be the first one to complain about dithering, ineffectual, time-wasting punters who dont know what they want and wont point out what they like and/or dislike :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Edited by BillGoldberg

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What I've learned is that real life punting is not porn. Don't assume that WG's are just copying porn you've seen and know what to do.

Indeed, if the WG/S are good or better its much much better than porn. Some younger WGs do act like they are in a porno though and have watched some and thought this is what punters will like. Dirty talk which i particularly like when done well is an aspect from porn that i have very much enjoyed, the lady talking dirty to me ideally.

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