Student S

Punters Messing Me About

44 posts in this topic

This has been covered a million times, but I am a bit sick of people ringing...arranging something...texting 3 or 4 times, are you still free? YES I AM. I am very reliable. Then ringing up as I waiting for my taxi and cancelling.

Also, people using another name on the other site to try and catch me out when I say I am not free. I have a normal life, and no I am not free. I am not lying.

VENT OVER.

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This has been covered a million times, but I am a bit sick of people ringing...arranging something...texting 3 or 4 times, are you still free? YES I AM. I am very reliable. Then ringing up as I waiting for my taxi and cancelling.

Also, people using another name on the other site to try and catch me out when I say I am not free. I have a normal life, and no I am not free. I am not lying.

VENT OVER.

Hi there, S.

Are you aware of http://www.saafe.info/main/index.php ? The ladies on there are generally very wise and have developed lots of ways to avoid being caught out by timewasters. Type it into the search and you should get lots of info. It's unfortunately part of the job that some people will mess you about. Sometimes guys will book and have no intention of ever seeing you, or they book and change their mind, or indeed, they book and then something comes up or gets in the way. I don't know if this is the same for everyone, but the longer I've worked the better I've gotten at spotting the fantasists who are never going to materialise.

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SS, as Rose mentioned, you’ll develop your timewasters radar over time, but that doesn’t help now I suppose. All you can do is pick up tips from more experienced ladies and learn to recognise the idiots as you go along. If it’s any consolation though I do actually think the numbers of TWs and nobbers has increased over the past few months, and one theory I have is that men are having to find ways of getting their jollies without spending money. This can take the form of getting as much sexy chat out of the ladies as possible, or making bookings with ladies and cancelling at the last minute or not showing. I realise that life gets in the way and people have to cancel for genuine reasons, so it doesn’t include them, but I’m sure there are those who just like the fantasy of meeting an escort.

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Lots of texts can be a warning sign, err and why ask "Are you still free"?

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This has been covered a million times, but I am a bit sick of people ringing...arranging something...texting 3 or 4 times, are you still free? YES I AM. I am very reliable. Then ringing up as I waiting for my taxi and cancelling. Also, people using another name on the other site to try and catch me out when I say I am not free. I have a normal life, and no I am not free. I am not lying. VENT OVER.

Welcome to the forum Student S. :) Timewasters do genuine punters no favours and are real arseholes in my view. When i make a booking its because i have already decided i wish to punt with that particular WG so i will be there as agreed. As others have said these people are probably getting their jollies and/or cant afford to punt so will ring WGs instead of very expensive premium rate numbers which arent in peoples phone packages.

On a negative note, i cant see a way that will eradicate timewasters completely but as soon as they start mentioning what you are wearing now and asking if you like anal sex etc if it were me that would be phone putting down on them time, or using the whistle Susan Glasgow mentioned recently. As Rose said have a read of Saafe and you will hopefully be given some good tips. :)

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Hi Student!

As the others have said you do get better at spotting the timewasters, but all of us get caught out every so often.

Saying that, I've been doing this 2.5 years and sometimes still let some TWs slip through the net and I end up missing other bookings whilst I wait for them, I also decide not to see some men because I get the TW warning bell then feel bad that I might have done a perfectly genuine man a disservice and missed out on a booking! Sadly, it's part of the job!

Also bear in mind that someone cancelling may have to for a perfectly good reason, I think if they actually call to cancel and apologise then they are genuine- remember most men do this covertly so if something to do with work, family or friends pops up it can be hard for them to wiggle out of it to see a WG. Someone cancelling and genuinely apologetic will get another chance and I will be gracious to them when they call. It's the ones that just don't show up without telling me who really piss me off and get blacklisted. Also save any numbers in your phone- I put them in as NS (no show) so I don't even respond to them again if they call.

It sounds like you only do outcalls from your post- do you get full addresses or hotel room numbers in advance and double check them? I would doubt a man who is not serious at seeing you at all would give you this information in advance.

I also find these things come in phases- you have a shitty run and then a great run of lovely reliable nice chaps- therefore you're due for a good spell!

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...

Also bear in mind that someone cancelling may have to for a perfectly good reason, I think if they actually call to cancel and apologise then they are genuine- remember most men do this covertly so if something to do with work, family or friends pops up it can be hard for them to wiggle out of it to see a WG. Someone cancelling and genuinely apologetic will get another chance and I will be gracious to them when they call. ...

the number of punts i have had spoiled by work stuff getting in the way is too many. should be a law against it!

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This has been covered a million times, but I am a bit sick of people ringing...arranging something...texting 3 or 4 times, are you still free? YES I AM. I am very reliable. Then ringing up as I waiting for my taxi and cancelling.

Best advice I can give is to try and nip it in the bud with them by just saying/texting something like; "Yes of course. I have booked you in for that time and look foward to seeing you" When they call to cancel maybe just firmly but tactfully remind them they have wasted your time. That you are dressed and made up ready to see them specifically, and that if they weren't sure if they'd be able to make it they should have not made the booking and that next time they should only call if they know they can make it.

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Believe it or not, this one happens both ways too :wacko:

I had booked a Lady for an outcall at my place, shaved, showered and filed my nails (see other threads :) ) when I received a text to say she had a problem at her day job, and could not make it :mad:

At the time, I had not yet met the Lady, and wondered about her authenticity, and was, well, a bit :eek: !!

Third time lucky, however :) ( I had to cancel on her also another time ( but with more notice ) due to a head cold :( ) and I have now seen her twice, and I am glad we BOTH persevered through the difficulties as she's very good :D ( I wouldn't have been back for seconds, otherwise, now would I ? )

All I'm trying to point out here is that we are ALL human, and have the usual problems of normal life ! I suppose you Ladies have more problems with time wasters than we Service Seekers do, but as you become more experienced, SS, I think you will develop the "radar" that the other Ladies on here have mentioned :)

Good Luck in your new hobby/profession. :)

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Apologies on behalf of us decent punters! As Jack the Lad says, this does swing both ways and I've been let down by flakey WGs in the past - I think it does take some time to get the bullshit radar working!

Not that I'm turned on by angry ladies venting :wub: , but I'm curious now - you mention having a profile on the other site, would you mind to drop me the link?

Thanks x

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Best advice I can give is to try and nip it in the bud with them by just saying/texting something like; "Yes of course. I have booked you in for that time and look foward to seeing you" When they call to cancel maybe just firmly but tactfully remind them they have wasted your time. That you are dressed and made up ready to see them specifically, and that if they weren't sure if they'd be able to make it they should have not made the booking and that next time they should only call if they know they can make it.

This can backfire some guys actually enjoy getting off on the idea they've wasted your time, or on the flip side some would take it to mean you don't want them to book you again, or that if they did then you'd be resentful to the point of offering a bad service.

A polite "Thanks for letting me know", quick note to record the cancel and just bear it in mind if they do muck about again is all that's required.

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i get this a lot too. i generally notice that this is gonna happen when they start texting me loads. when that happens i just stop replying. don't need to be dealing with a stalker/freak. they will never ever follow thru with meeting up.

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Apologies on behalf of us decent punters! As Jack the Lad says, this does swing both ways and I've been let down by flakey WGs in the past - I think it does take some time to get the bullshit radar working! Not that I'm turned on by angry ladies venting :wub: , but I'm curious now - you mention having a profile on the other site, would you mind to drop me the link? Thanks x

Please dont apoligise on my behalf, if i feel the need to apoligise i will do so myself. As i am not responsible for those that mess WGs about and i dont do so myself there is no apoligy here to make on my behalf. These punters are arseholes and it does work both ways although WGs as the SP experience it more than punters by a big difference.

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Believe it or not, this one happens both ways too :wacko:

Oy yes, my first punt was a series of disasters... On the first attempt to meet I got almost to and phoned as instructed, to no answer. I hung around a bit and tried again a few times, but eventually gave up and went home. she got in touch later that evening to apologise, as she'd been away that day and hadn't managed to get back (and hadn't taken her work phone with her). we resheduled for a few days later, and it got to an hour or so before the time, when I had a text to say she wasn't well, and could we reschedule again. I began to wonder if she actually didn't want to see me! However, everything came together on the third try, she apologised profusely for the trouble she'd given me previously, and we got on really well.

The third time I was due to see her (yes, she was worth returning to), I had to cancel as a family member ended up in hospital that day, and that was obviously more important. I guess she forgave my short notice, as I've seen her again since, with no problems at all.

Had a something similar happen with the second girl I met as well, so maybe I'm just cursed. Things seem to have gone more smoothly recently at least.

So yes, it can happen both ways, and there are genuine reasons why it's not always possible to meet as planned. Communicating this as soon as you know there may be a problem makes all of the difference though, and is surely just simply courtesy, whatever the situation? Though I know that the concept of courtesy is alien to many.

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It does happen both ways,

and as a punter I have alsoe developed a bit of a time-wasters radar. I remember my first no-show-without-notice from a sheffield indie (now gone, I think). I was furious, especially as next day it was clear she was lying to me about forgetting-phone-at-fitness!

I'd love to rant about how some girls probably string you on, and delay cancelling to the last-minute, either to prevent you going to the competition maybe they just have you on the 2nd-best-option list.

From the punter side, on the risk of souning sad: sometimes we have to cancel - real life can be a bitch (and so is the boss).

The worst thing is when I genuinely have to cancel. Some girls go ape, some go all sobstory, some go all threatening. problem is: if you girls insist too much, I am forced to put you on my no-retry list as well, no matter how horny or curious I still am for you.

It is one of the reasons why I only give off phone-nr and hotel-details at the very last moment, if I am absolutely sure I can make it.

Last thing you want is her+driver in hotel lobby, claiming damages + trainfare, when you got the boss for dinner.

I've now learnt to take a no-show, with or without credible sounding excuse, in my stride (but I will remain very careful with my details). I try not to worry too much if she does cancel.

If I have a genuine impression, or for some other reason still trust the girl to be good, reliable and safe, I will re-try. But if she takes "rejection" badly, I'm force to put her on TW list myself.

I'm sure I missed a few really good ones that way.

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One of the funny things is that if I need to apologise or cancel outside this industry, I call. My voice conveys more sincerity than an email can. Also, a phone call is more immediate.

Texts & emails from a person who allegedly wants to get up close & personal with me, seem like a shifty way of cancelling. The two clients I've seen after they cancelled our first meeting called me, the others who have cancelled by text or email I won't see.

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One of the funny things is that if I need to apologise or cancel outside this industry, I call. My voice conveys more sincerity than an email can. Also, a phone call is more immediate.

Texts & emails from a person who allegedly wants to get up close & personal with me, seem like a shifty way of cancelling. The two clients I've seen after they cancelled our first meeting called me, the others who have cancelled by text or email I won't see.

You need to be a bit more tolerant Lara.

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You need to be a bit more tolerant Lara.

Excuse me?! It's my body! It's my time being wasted.

Save your breath to cool your own porridge! ☺

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Excuse me?! It's my body! It's my time being wasted.

Save your breath to cool your own porridge! ☺

No need to get into a strop and who said its not your body? What I meant by being tolerant is that it's probable that the client can only cancel by text or e-mail at the time and there may be a genuine reason why he couldn't do it via a phone call. It has happened to me so I speak from experience.

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I doubt it was with me. Either way, calling & apologising would work.

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One of the funny things is that if I need to apologise or cancel outside this industry, I call. My voice conveys more sincerity than an email can. Also, a phone call is more immediate.

Texts & emails from a person who allegedly wants to get up close & personal with me, seem like a shifty way of cancelling. The two clients I've seen after they cancelled our first meeting called me, the others who have cancelled by text or email I won't see.

In all my punts over the years I've only once ever had to cancel. I did this by email and received the most charming and understanding reply. I'd have found it very harsh, and rather weird, to be blacklisted for using email to cancel.

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That's not the question.

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Ok: Let's look at the business case....

Someone, who may or may not be a genuine client makes an appointment... I incur costs in order to see that person, as I don't work from home. I also, almost certainly turn down other things, be they social, clothed paid work, another sex-work client or a study session with a 2nd year I mentor.

I swallow the financial loss, why would I risk it again? How would I know he's genuine. If I speak to him, I have a better sense of his sincerity & may decide it's worth the risk.

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It's not for me to comment on your business arrangements. I was responding to your assertion that cancelling by email is shifty.

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