enzio

Coming Out And Outing

47 posts in this topic

I don't personally think I have the balls to out myself as a punter yet. Perhaps when I am over sixty, divorced and my kids have grown up, left home and can deal with it.

Question being will the stigma attached to prostitution ever change if punters and WG's never out themselves and argue in favour of dismantling the current legislation surrounding our hobbie.

What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Like enzio, I'm unlikely to come 'out' myself anytime soon.

But I'd certainly admire the balls of anyone who does expose themselves as a customer of wgs.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't personally think I have the balls to out myself as a punter yet. Perhaps when I am over sixty, divorced and my kids have grown up, left home and can deal with it.

Question being will the stigma attached to prostitution ever change if punters and WG's never out themselves and argue in favour of dismantling the current legislation surrounding our hobbie.

What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.

I don't personally think I have the balls to out myself as a punter yet. Perhaps when I am over sixty, divorced and my kids have grown up, left home and can deal with it. Question being will the stigma attached to prostitution ever change if punters and WG's never out themselves and argue in favour of dismantling the current legislation surrounding our hobbie. What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.
I don't personally think I have the balls to out myself as a punter yet. Perhaps when I am over sixty, divorced and my kids have grown up, left home and can deal with it. Question being will the stigma attached to prostitution ever change if punters and WG's never out themselves and argue in favour of dismantling the current legislation surrounding our hobbie. What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.

I dont agree with outing any WG or punter against their wishes, even hypocrite politicians. Punting will only start to become more acceptable when the media image of street worker junkies and perverted mac wearing stereotypes is changed to show the whole industry not just this illegal and most basic form of punting.

Posters like Elrond along with others on here put their views about punting to the powers that be and do what they can to change joe publics perception. Its a start hopefully to be built upon but i would imagine it will take many years if not generations for it to be accepted, if ever.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't personally think I have the balls to out myself as a punter yet. Perhaps when I am over sixty, divorced and my kids have grown up, left home and can deal with it.

Question being will the stigma attached to prostitution ever change if punters and WG's never out themselves and argue in favour of dismantling the current legislation surrounding our hobbie.

I don't see any purpose served at all by admitting that you pay for sex to anyone, even if you were over 60, kids grown up etc.

Your kids may have kids, your grandchildren for all I know.

Can you imagine them finding out that Grandad pays women to suck his cock......what a dirty old man!

Yes that sounds tough, but that is how others will see it, so in my opinion never good to admit to.

It will always be frowned upon by most who do not do it as they see it as dirty and seedy, with men who use prostitutes as cheating scum, and the women who sell it as low life slags.

From my side I am damn proud of what I do, but to tell family and friends that I do what I do and they would look at me in an unfavourable light no doubt.

Lucy :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

...It will always be frowned upon by most who do not do it as they see it as dirty and seedy, with men who use prostitutes as cheating scum, and the women who sell it as low life slags...

Yup, and you only have to read the vitriol spouted on Mumsnet whenever the word "escort" is mentioned. It's not pretty and the wronged women are always encouraged to "leave the bastard". It's seen as far worse than a normal affair, because he's a "sexual misogynist who exploits vulnerable young women for sexual pleasure” and a “cheating, lying git who spends the children’s money on disease ridden manky whores”. Best keep it to ourselves I reckon.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Unless action is taken to change the perception of prostitution (in the media or elsewhere) then that perception is always going to remain. If I remember rightly those who were gay were considered in a derogatory manner (as lowlife scum) when they first came out even by some of their family and friends. However, it was the fact that they did come out and eventually in such vast numbers that lead to perceptions of the gay community slowly beginning to change. I just can't see much being done by the punting community to change perceptions of punting. Perhaps I'm wrong and I'm not sure outing ourselves is the right thing to be doing either but its a thought.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know what you are saying enzio.

My kids know I am a bit fruity and we think they think that we are swingers, they make little jokes about it to us at times.

My sons mates parents are swingers, it is well known in our area.

That seems acceptable, but as soon as money changes hands it makes it not to one and all.

I do not do anything different now sex wise to what I did when I used to meet men off swing sites for sex, apart from now taking the money.

Prostitutes and punters will always be looked down upon.

Lucy :)

Edited by Lucy7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

...................went wrong.

Edited by Lucy7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes, we stay in the Closet as Sex Workers to protect those around us... Parents, partners, siblings. I'd defend them to the death!

I enjoy my work, but I don't feel the same burning need to defend it as I do those dear to me. The silly girls using fake pics, the fools doing BB & the misogynists would all benefit if we decided to out ourselves to destigmatise the industry.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes, we stay in the Closet as Sex Workers to protect those around us... Parents, partners, siblings. I'd defend them to the death!

I enjoy my work, but I don't feel the same burning need to defend it as I do those dear to me. The silly girls using fake pics, the fools doing BB & the misogynists would all benefit if we decided to out ourselves to destigmatise the industry.

If it all became more acceptable and mainstream, demand for the top quality providers would rocket, but the supply of attractive willing providers would stay fundamentally constrained by nature. End result; Lara puts her prices RIGHT up, and I'd have no chance of getting an appointment. The desirable attractive girls would become as unattainable in punterville as they are in real life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If it all became more acceptable and mainstream, demand for the top quality providers would rocket, but the supply of attractive willing providers would stay fundamentally constrained by nature. End result; Lara puts her prices RIGHT up, and I'd have no chance of getting an appointment. The desirable attractive girls would become as unattainable in punterville as they are in real life.

The flip side being that if it all remained underground and no one spoke out, eventually it will be criminalised, you will end up in cuffs, in front of a magistrate, possibly in a prison cell and outed anyway. The status quo is unlikely to last forever.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Interesting that nobody has addressed the question in the final line of the original post.

In general, I would condemn any WG who outed any client, but in the specific case where Sir Algernon Fortescue has made his reputation in public life by condemning the sex trade, while indulging in it himself, I can see why a WG might be tempted. A more effective way of dealing with him might be to refuse to see him and advise all others to do the same. Then he would have to take up w*nking and join most other politicians, who are generally held in pretty low esteem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Nobody should "out" anyone. Discretion & respect for people's privacy are vital in this game.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

some things might be worth outing, punting?never! No matter how you try to dress it up or dress it down for that matter, punting will always be seen as dirty and morally wrong to some. I think its one thing thats best kept under wraps, literally!

As for politicians,while Im not a fan of them in general...I dont see why their private life should be any different to a civilian punter. However if you are a politician or especially a celeb then it doesnt take half a brain cell to realise that if you choose to see wg's there is a high risk someone might out you to make a quick buck...prime example: Wayne Rooney going to see a v mature wg ..oh and we all remember what happened to Hugh Grant :)

Edited by Cole77

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I make an exception for people who make a living out of suppressing the sex industry while enjoying it themselves.

There was that Eliot Spitzer, who prosecuted escort agencies, but not the one he was a client of. He truly deserved to be outed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yup, and you only have to read the vitriol spouted on Mumsnet whenever the word "escort" is mentioned. It's not pretty and the wronged women are always encouraged to "leave the bastard". It's seen as far worse than a normal affair, because he's a "sexual misogynist who exploits vulnerable young women for sexual pleasure” and a “cheating, lying git who spends the children’s money on disease ridden manky whores”. Best keep it to ourselves I reckon.

I have discussed this issue with some pals.All would be of the view that the odd punt with an escort whilst abroad or something would be tolreated by their wives/partners, indeed nearly expected by them, but what would be totally unacceptable would be a full affair with a lady on their own doorstep ! I find it difficult to believe that a wife would be bothered ending family life as she knows it just because hubby stepped off-side with an escort on a golf trip. Doesnt make sense to me. ( Now, regular, pre-meditated punting with escorts locally would be a big problem I'm sure ).

p.s For the married guys, if your wife was away with the girls abroad on a short break and she got pissed and had a one -off encounter with someone, would you file for divorce ?

Edited by cumandgo

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Interesting that nobody has addressed the question in the final line of the original post. In general, I would condemn any WG who outed any client, but in the specific case where Sir Algernon Fortescue has made his reputation in public life by condemning the sex trade, while indulging in it himself, I can see why a WG might be tempted. A more effective way of dealing with him might be to refuse to see him and advise all others to do the same. Then he would have to take up w*nking and join most other politicians, who are generally held in pretty low esteem.

I did address the question Paul. If a punter has been dangerous or in anyway violent then thats one thing but being a hypocrite in my view doesnt justify outing someone who on a punt itself has behaved himself.

"Do as i say, not as i do" has always been how things really are sadly, punting wise only a media change to telling the whole story of paid sex will change perceptions and cause lasting change in my opinion. That isnt going to happen anytime soon in my estimation. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think there is a very good chance that within a generation things could change. Fifty years ago prostitutes could not and were not discussed in the media. The internet also has made a profound change and possibly most importantly we now have an extremely articulate group, the students, a percentage of whom make it either a short term career choice and in some cases a long term one.

I am very optimistic about the future.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did address the question Paul. If a punter has been dangerous or in anyway violent then thats one thing but being a hypocrite in my view doesnt justify outing someone who on a punt itself has behaved himself.

"Do as i say, not as i do" has always been how things really are sadly, punting wise only a media change to telling the whole story of paid sex will change perceptions and cause lasting change in my opinion. That isnt going to happen anytime soon in my estimation. :)

Yes you did, Smiths. I apologise for the over sight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.

No matter how socially accepted this became - I would never out myself. Being a provider is a separate part of my life, and one day (hopefully within the next two years) I will move on in my life and put it behind me. My closest friends, sisters, partner and such know, and that is all that matters to me. The general public does not need to know.

In regards to outting politicians - I don't care what legislations they push for, in my opinion the ONLY time it would be permissable to out a client is bc they were threatening you/harming you, etc. Even if you don't agree with someone's beliefs, etc, they have trusted you with their personal information, just as we as providers trust our clients with ours, and under no other circumstance is it ok to break that trust.

Edited by Madison

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yes you did, Smiths. I apologise for the over sight.

No problem Paul and no need to apologise but thanks. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If it all became more acceptable and mainstream, demand for the top quality providers would rocket, but the supply of attractive willing providers would stay fundamentally constrained by nature. End result; Lara puts her prices RIGHT up, and I'd have no chance of getting an appointment. The desirable attractive girls would become as unattainable in punterville as they are in real life.

I'm not sure I see that d123. Is there a large pool of wealthy clients who are currently inactive but who would rush forward if punting were more accepable to society? I'm not sure. If there are wealthy randy guys out there who want to punt then I reckon they're not sitting back waiting for social acceptance, they're punting like crazy right now. And conversely, I think that perhaps there are lots of pretty young women who would gladly take advantage of the opportunity to earn good money if prostitution suddenly lost its social stigma. So if that happened I think that supply might well increase more than demand and some prices might well come down.

I think there is a very good chance that within a generation things could change. Fifty years ago prostitutes could not and were not discussed in the media. The internet also has made a profound change and possibly most importantly we now have an extremely articulate group, the students, a percentage of whom make it either a short term career choice and in some cases a long term one.

I am very optimistic about the future.

Yes I can see that argument; it's logical to allow that the influential amongst today's younger generation ends up defining tomorrow's values.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I make an exception for people who make a living out of suppressing the sex industry while enjoying it themselves.

There was that Eliot Spitzer, who prosecuted escort agencies, but not the one he was a client of. He truly deserved to be outed.

I didn't know that he prosecuted agencies. Have you any detail to support that? I would be interested to know.

I do know that he was outed because he was trying to clean up Wall St.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wouldn't dream of outing anyone and would hate it if someone did it to me. Sometimes its best to keep these things to yourself if only to protect your familly from a whole load of grief.

Shelly

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What do people think of WG's outing politicians who may see them but who argue for more stringent legislation surrounding prostitution.

When the last legislation was going through the only male politician that I can recall who was pushing for it (and repeating the discredited stats from The Poppy Project) was Dennis McShane.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now