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Student S

Following On From A Previous Topic On Friendship...

21 posts in this topic

Maybe I am mistaken, but isn't the whole point of punting = the client isn't our friend even if we are friendly to each other.

I like some if not all my clients, but frienship can take many forms (see Aristotle!!).

Would you want me to ring you up crying about my roof falling in or needing a lift somewhere? I doubt it very mucg,

The point is that you get good sex, and not all the emotional blah blah that being my boyfriend or friend would entail.

You don't need to worry about if I am happy or unhappy generally in my life (happy btw!!) although I do know some clients do on some level, but I hope you can see my point.

In life there are a multitude of different levels of "relationships." If I have a fck buddy (I don't!) which is unpaid...is he my mate? A confusing one, as I probably wouldn't act the same way with him as with a girlfriend.

So punting is what it is and I have learnt to take it for what it is.

I am happy that I have met some wonderful interesting people that I would not have met otherwise.

I am sure that I will get some people saying it's paid and means nothing etc etc, and would I see them without the money. Who knows? But I wouldn't have come across them otherwise. AND IS THAT WHAT THE PUNTER WANTS? You don't want to take me to the supermarket, do you? I have a free slot tomorrow if you do!!!

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Having a WG that is a friend too is nice, I have developed a friendship with a regular, and it adds a different dimension to our meetings. I spend more time with her as a friend than I do as a client (just a few hours after the booking, no physical contact). Some people DO want this, and as long as there remains a hard line between these 2 states then it can work. The problem comes when feelings grow about the friendship but these must be kept at bay. Some of my male friends have wives that I'm friends with that I find attractive, but I don't fall for them. We are naturally capable of keeping certain emotions in check. I would never turn down the opportunity to make a new friend, life is all about friendships.

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My theory on the whole punter/escort 'friendship' thing is that if you take away both money and the sex do you still see each other? There are men out there who will feign friendship to get free sex and women who do the same to get money or presents or favours.

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That's all very well but it's really nice for a man (well, me) to get a little genuine warmth from a woman and to return it even though it's a brief encounter. And when a girl has given me a lovely intimate experience such as fondling my cock and licking it, and doing all this in a really friendly way, smiling at me and so on..... well, yes I certainly do care about her afterwards! The fact that she did such lovely intimate physical acts for me arouses warm feelings for her within me, and if she had a problem i'd definitely listen sympathetically and help her if I could.

I feel grateful to her for what she has done for me because i know I just can't get that anywhere else, unfortunately. A woman giving me physical intimacy and being really nice about it while she does so means everything to me even though it's for money. But that's just me. Maybe most men wouldn't agree.

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In my business I have many regular customers that I genuinely enjoy having a banter with on the phone, and people in my industry that I will have a drink and a chat with at a trade show, however I would have no desire particularly to see them outside of work. Is that so different? Doesn't mean I am being false with them at the time, just that there are boundaries, even when neither party is sticking bodily parts into the other (not usually anyway).

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I have a (fairly) regular lady atm who has been the only person in my life I have been able to talk to about an issue of mine - a broken heart :-( and she has been a wonderful friend. I didn't thrust this on her, she was open to it and generally encouraged this exchange. Bookings with her now are a hugely better experience and we exchange emails like friends. Naturally I wouldn't expect a wg to do this as a matter of course, but as she has, I value it immensely

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Would you want me to ring you up crying about my roof falling in or needing a lift somewhere? I doubt it very mucg,

But it happens!

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Think Student S has got the whole thing spot on - very mature for a student. Yes we should be friendly during the contact of course, but the whole point of punting, for me at least, is the "no-strings" sex. I have plenty of friends but none who want to pleasure me, or me to pleasure them I think!

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In my business I have many regular customers that I genuinely enjoy having a banter with on the phone, and people in my industry that I will have a drink and a chat with at a trade show, however I would have no desire particularly to see them outside of work. Is that so different? Doesn't mean I am being false with them at the time, just that there are boundaries, even when neither party is sticking bodily parts into the other (not usually anyway).

exactly, agree

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I always swap a few emails first with any of the guys I see, just to see if I can get a feel for them before the initial meeting. Sometimes it works out well, and there are one or two men that I'd email once or twice a week just to catch up with or because we have something in common (one I will probably never see again due to location, and the other I may see only occaisonaly as he's NI - it's just fun banter, and conversation). I quite like having the two of them in my life even if it's only just emails, I have one friend who knows that I do this, so it is nice to have people to chat to about escorting (prostitution...), because it can be so isolating at times. That said when I'm not working, I just morph back into real me and like to pretend that I don't actually do this (Catholic guilt/believing the stigma/ hormones, it's hard to be 22) and that I'm just a normal student; so I don't want someone in my life every day who is a constant reminder.

That said, some guys take up 'friendly' the totally wrong way, and decide that because you want to chat you're in love with them. I have one of these guys at the minute, and it is the trickiest situation to extricate yourself from. It's like VinDaLoo said, just because you're friends with someone in work, doesn't necessarily mean that you'd be friends with them in real life.

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My theory on the whole punter/escort 'friendship' thing is that if you take away both money and the sex do you still see each other? There are men out there who will feign friendship to get free sex and women who do the same to get money or presents or favours.

What you say is real world. After all if it was business that started the friendship, there is always business in that friendship. If it was friendship before business was started than there is always friendship in business. Once a customer, always a customer!

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I have a free slot tomorrow if you do!!!

Errrmmm ! Nice to think of you with a 'free slot', Student S, but I only have something with which to fill it, not one of my own :unsure:

( Catholic guilt/believing the stigma/ hormones, it's hard to be 22)

It's even harder ( or not, as the case may be :( ) SSN, to be old ! You will find out one day. :unsure:

Jack. :ph34r:

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I think Student S is pretty much right.

It would be really nice to be friends with an escort from my perspective, but I'm not sure it just wouldn't get too complicated ultimately.

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The situation has never arisen for me. I do 2 hour + meets and try to make sure that the WG I see is not just physically attractive to me but that we “get on“ fairly well. A few mails plus a phone call usually sorts this out.

When we do meet I know full well that it is a business transaction first but if we get on well and enjoy each others company that's what can make an outstanding punt. After, I never have any contact except maybe a thank you mail and to ask about feedback.

I don't expect to form a friendship with her and I never would try to. I don't think its fair to put either of us in a potententially embarrasing position.

As long as we both have a great time then that's what matters to me.

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There's a client who walked through the door with a bottle of Champagne & we had a genuinely engaging & funny conversation as though I'd known him forever. After 45 mins, I looked at the clock & said, "we're meant to shag!", so we did. I had other clients to see, so I had to get organised. He responds to my blog, I respond to his. We know each other's real names & yes, we are friends.

When I retire in a couple of days, we'll still be friends. No sex, no fees & it will be brilliant. I don't think you can legislate for friendship, sometimes you meet people & you have a great time together & end up being friends.

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Great post Lara, I wish you the best in all you do

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The client can be our friend for as long as it lasts.....

I have been doing Lucy7 meets for 26 months now and I am not a silly billy, but a realist to all that can happen doing sex this way.

We are friends for as long as the arrangement lasts between us.

I care about some of my gentleman callers more than others.

We share personal stuff with each other, but I do truly think that once the common denominator stops, the friendship may well cease.

I had two blokes last year who I met quite a lot of who were both were pretty ill, I did not see either for about 6 months and feared the worst.

I could not text them as I did not know if they had safe phones.

I sent both a message via the purple site in the end asking after them.

One still has not signed on (last time I looked), the other sent me a "I'm fine now hunni" type of reply.

Now with that bloke, I had thought we were friends of a sort as he had shared so much personal stuff with me and even cried on occasions ............but him not telling me he was ok made me realise that sometimes you are just friends for a certain time period.

Lucy :)

Edited by Lucy7

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During my punts I'm always friendly with the girl, and I specifically see those who are described as friendly in their profiles. I get on really well with a couple of them. I don't consider them to be friends outside of the booking, but I wouldn't have a problem with it if they wished to move the friendship outside of the booking - but, as I've said before, I feel that it has to be a move on her part that moves things that way, I don't feel that it's the punter's. I'm sure that the girls I've seen on multiple occasions know by now that I like them, and enjoy their company as well as the sex, so if they liked me and wanted to be friends (in whatever form that may take) then all they have to do is tell me. What happens beyond that has to be decided between friends.

As far as I'm concerned a friendship can start up anywhere, with anybody, at anytime, as long as both parties want it to happen.

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My theory on the whole punter/escort 'friendship' thing is that if you take away both money and the sex do you still see each other? There are men out there who will feign friendship to get free sex and women who do the same to get money or presents or favours.

What you say is real world. After all if it was business that started the friendship, there is always business in that friendship. If it was friendship before business was started than there is always friendship in business. Once a customer, always a customer!

I can't agree with you two more :)

Edited by HotFemLover

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My theory on the whole punter/escort 'friendship' thing is that if you take away both money and the sex do you still see each other? There are men out there who will feign friendship to get free sex and women who do the same to get money or presents or favours.

I think you're spot on Lyd! Take away what you are both 'in' in for then see how long the friendship lasts!

For me personally I've met a lt of nice people doing this, a few I would call friends & we say hi to each other on & off but nothing more. I've also met a very good friend from it, each to their own I guess!

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I've got customers I consider friends, I've even started at the same salsa class as one of my clients as he recommended it. I'd like to think we'd stay friends if I retired from working but I don't know. It's a bit awkward knowing someone through this industry really I suppose :mellow:

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