JustPassing

Independents; My (basic) Advice

61 posts in this topic

My run of luck with independent ladies has been dire, capped by a meeting yesterday which was awful beyond words. I know my experience isn't typically but I thought I'd share my "things to watch out for" list for what it's worth (probably not much). Appologies if this has been done to death or just common sense.

Before I start I want to state the obvious that I'm sure there are many, many excellent independent ladies out there. I just - with a comic run of bad luck - have managed to run into horror after horror.

Here goes ....

[1] When phoning an independent - her voice will tell you everything you need to know. I don't know how to explain this, but if your looking at a picture of a gorgeous woman she will also sound gorgeous on the phone. If you get that spider-sense you've just be talking to somebody different, look back at that picture and realise the obvious. Politely run a mile. For my last encounter, the pictures appeared to show a smoking-hot ~25 year-old. On the phone I can remember hanging up and thinking she sounded more like she was in her 40's and had a pretty impressive smoking habit. You'd think I'd put 2 and 2 together. I didn't.

[2] Similar to [1]. When you've talked to her on the phone, how did the conversation go or "feel". If it was "flat" or strained again be nice, but run. Big warning triangle.

[3] Always trust your instincts - they are telling you things you've missed eg that photo showed the lady in a lovely apartment and you've just arrived at a seriously run-down block of flats. You ignore this because you're thinking with your pants. Or worse, you are like me - an idiot thinking with their pants.

[4] You knock on the door and it's opened to reveal an absolute dive with the woman hiding behind the door. There might as well be a neon sign on the door flashing the words "bait and switch". Nothing good is going to happen here.

[5] Never, EVER go ahead with a punt starting from the point of "lets get this over with and get me the hell out of here". Be polite, pay for inconvenience etc but NEVER go ahead. The money you lose is immaterial - this is going to cost you a bit of your soul. It's really hard to back out when your this far committed so 9 times out of ten you're in hell. Hopefully following 1 -4 above should mean you never get this far, but I seem to mess this up every bloody time.

[6] Treat everything on a*w with utter, utter suspicion. If you ever find what looks to be a undiscovered gem with no feedback, repeat after me - I'm being an idiot :). Read between the lines. If it says "I'm in my 30's and new to this", remember that could also be translated as "my life's just gone down the pan and I'm turning to tricks in complete desperation". Even if the person has glowing feedback, again [3] trumps those. A recent punt I did with somebody from a* with perfect feedback was a nightmare, but looking back I broke 1, 2 and 4 above.

At the risk of getting flamed, I would also recommend parlors as the safest bet. Find a really good, well run, classy parlour (they are hard to find, but do exist). And still be exceptionally selective with the ladies there. I guess it's obvious - for a lady to be top of the tree in this environment AND make it past your super-selective radar, that - in my experience - is the best way to reduce the chance of feeling how I feel now.

Sorry - needed to vent. Totally screwed up after that last encounter. 24 hours later and I still feel messed up :wacko:

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Very interesting analysis, and a real example of why you should think with your upper brain, not the one in your boxers.

I have experienced some of the above but have generally had my worst punts in parlours so I still stick to indies.

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My run of luck with independent ladies has been dire, capped by a meeting yesterday which was awful beyond words. I know my experience isn't typically but I thought I'd share my "things to watch out for" list for what it's worth (probably not much). Appologies if this has been done to death or just common sense.

Before I start I want to state the obvious that I'm sure there are many, many excellent independent ladies out there. I just - with a comic run of bad luck - have managed to run into horror after horror.

Here goes ....

[1] When phoning an independent - her voice will tell you everything you need to know. I don't know how to explain this, but if your looking at a picture of a gorgeous woman she will also sound gorgeous on the phone. If you get that spider-sense you've just be talking to somebody different, look back at that picture and realise the obvious. Politely run a mile. For my last encounter, the pictures appeared to show a smoking-hot ~25 year-old. On the phone I can remember hanging up and thinking she sounded more like she was in her 40's and had a pretty impressive smoking habit. You'd think I'd put 2 and 2 together. I didn't.

[2] Similar to [1]. When you've talked to her on the phone, how did the conversation go or "feel". If it was "flat" or strained again be nice, but run. Big warning triangle.

[3] Always trust your instincts - they are telling you things you've missed eg that photo showed the lady in a lovely apartment and you've just arrived at a seriously run-down block of flats. You ignore this because you're thinking with your pants. Or worse, you are like me - an idiot thinking with their pants.

[4] You knock on the door and it's opened to reveal an absolute dive with the woman hiding behind the door. There might as well be a neon sign on the door flashing the words "bait and switch". Nothing good is going to happen here.

[5] Never, EVER go ahead with a punt starting from the point of "lets get this over with and get me the hell out of here". Be polite, pay for inconvenience etc but NEVER go ahead. The money you lose is immaterial - this is going to cost you a bit of your soul. It's really hard to back out when your this far committed so 9 times out of ten you're in hell. Hopefully following 1 -4 above should mean you never get this far, but I seem to mess this up every bloody time.

[6] Treat everything on a*w with utter, utter suspicion. If you ever find what looks to be a undiscovered gem with no feedback, repeat after me - I'm being an idiot :). Read between the lines. If it says "I'm in my 30's and new to this", remember that could also be translated as "my life's just gone down the pan and I'm turning to tricks in complete desperation". Even if the person has glowing feedback, again [3] trumps those. A recent punt I did with somebody from a* with perfect feedback was a nightmare, but looking back I broke 1, 2 and 4 above.

At the risk of getting flamed, I would also recommend parlors as the safest bet. Find a really good, well run, classy parlour (they are hard to find, but do exist). And still be exceptionally selective with the ladies there. I guess it's obvious - for a lady to be top of the tree in this environment AND make it past your super-selective radar, that - in my experience - is the best way to reduce the chance of feeling how I feel now.

Sorry - needed to vent. Totally screwed up after that last encounter. 24 hours later and I still feel messed up :wacko:

All sounds good advice to me except in my area Parlours are too expensive in comparison to Indies so i punt mostly with them and at Parties myself. Any hint of coldness on the phone when enquiring or in person and i am off nowadays, i dont want to punt with such WGs. Clearly seek confirmation of services advertised to do all i can to ensure they are actually on offer, if they arent its because i have been lied to. Some WGs tick as many services on their enjoys lists as possible on the purple site so treat it as fiction till you have spoken, some punters prefer email but not me.

I also NEVER think with my dick nowadays, i always have a plan B option. I treat the purple site as Jackanory, i still use it as its still the best location tool there is though and have punted with many good or better WGs who advertised on it, far more good than bad, but it allows scammers to operate if not is the scammer itself. So great caution is required in my experience.

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I have had good and bad experiences both with indies and parlours. I tend to favour indies for the 1-2-1 feeling. I have developed my "radar" over the years. When younger, I did too much thinking with my dick. I would aopproach / arrive at a tip to be greeted by your worst nightmare and have a conversation with my dick...

Brain..."bail out, this is crap"

Dick...." no, no - it's not that bad"

Brain..."I can do better than this"

Dick "You'll have to wait ages to fix another punt up, look it's getting late...we can do this she's not that bad,

shut your eyes and cover your nose"

Result - dick 1 brain 0

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"remain sceptical until proven otherwise and NEVER think with your dick"

I think I might have that as my epitaph. Would certainly give future generations of fututor genealogists something to ponder.

Edited by fututor

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Sound advice, JP.

Across scores of meetings with independents, I've never once had a bad experience. I avoid:

- Those who charge too low

- Those who have very poor English

- Those whose pictures indicate a complete lack of thought as to the impression they're creating

- Those below the (claimed) age of 23

- Those who charge for extras

- Those whose skin tone/appearance might indicate drug use, ill-health, an excessively hard life lol etc etc

- Those too keen to stress how horny they are

- Those too keen to stress how very lady-like and sophisticated they are

- Those without reviews

On the back of that, those escorts who I've seen have been smart, friendly, sexy, and (seemingly) doing the job more through choice than desperation.

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christ thanks dudley just around again zero reviews and must now go for lessons in how to speak like a right slapper then xxx

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Sound advice, JP.

Across scores of meetings with independents, I've never once had a bad experience. I avoid:

- Those who charge too low

- Those who have very poor English

- Those whose pictures indicate a complete lack of thought as to the impression they're creating

- Those below the (claimed) age of 23

- Those who charge for extras

- Those whose skin tone/appearance might indicate drug use, ill-health, an excessively hard life lol etc etc

- Those too keen to stress how horny they are

- Those too keen to stress how very lady-like and sophisticated they are

- Those without reviews

On the back of that, those escorts who I've seen have been smart, friendly, sexy, and (seemingly) doing the job more through choice than desperation.

Despite my limited experience, which is much much much less than Dudley, I would agree with all the above but add one of my own.

I know it's a generalisation and there will be many ladies who disagree but it is only my personal opinion.

If when I am talking to a lady on the phone attempting to make a meeting and she starts calling me " sweetheart " or " love " or " darling " I instantly start to lose interest. It doesn't matter what her accent is or the pitch of her voice. Rightly or wrongly it comes across to me as someone who thinks rather a lot of themselves. Selfishly I would like to spend time with a lady who thought about me for an hour rather than her own ego.

I'm sure that everyone, punter or wg, has their own little quirks about what switches their interest off.

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Sound advice, JP.

Across scores of meetings with independents, I've never once had a bad experience. I avoid:

- Those who charge too low

- Those who have very poor English

- Those whose pictures indicate a complete lack of thought as to the impression they're creating

- Those below the (claimed) age of 23

- Those who charge for extras

- Those whose skin tone/appearance might indicate drug use, ill-health, an excessively hard life lol etc etc

- Those too keen to stress how horny they are

- Those too keen to stress how very lady-like and sophisticated they are

- Those without reviews

On the back of that, those escorts who I've seen have been smart, friendly, sexy, and (seemingly) doing the job more through choice than desperation.

Welcome to the forum Dudley. :) If i had followed your list i would of missed out on many gems, charging too little, lack of English and lack of reviews dont necessarily put me off, and age wise as long as i believe a WG is over 18 then it could be punt on. Obviously we all have our own views and way of punting, if it works for you thats all that matters. :)

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Your advice seems to completely leave out the fact that there are plenty of established and reputable independent ladies. Please don't bung us all in as one.

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good to know you guys are on the ball - dudley why would you be turned off my girls charging extra? i charge extra for a and w/s. if i didnt, everyone would want it (a especially, which being only human i can deal with a little bit at a time!)

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Welcome to the forum Dudley. :) If i had followed your list i would of missed out on many gems, charging too little, lack of English and lack of reviews dont necessarily put me off, and age wise as long as i believe a WG is over 18 then it could be punt on. Obviously we all have our own views and way of punting, if it works for you thats all that matters. :)

Thanks, smiths. No doubt I have missed out here and there but while punting is fun and all, I do also want to be able to sleep at night. (This is not to impugn your choices.)

Despite my limited experience, which is much much much less than Dudley, I would agree with all the above but add one of my own.

I know it's a generalisation and there will be many ladies who disagree but it is only my personal opinion.

If when I am talking to a lady on the phone attempting to make a meeting and she starts calling me " sweetheart " or " love " or " darling " I instantly start to lose interest. It doesn't matter what her accent is or the pitch of her voice. Rightly or wrongly it comes across to me as someone who thinks rather a lot of themselves. Selfishly I would like to spend time with a lady who thought about me for an hour rather than her own ego.

I'm sure that everyone, punter or wg, has their own little quirks about what switches their interest off.

The use of the word 'hun' turns my blood cold. 'Babe', on the other hand, makes me go all squishy.

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Your advice seems to completely leave out the fact that there are plenty of established and reputable independent ladies. Please don't bung us all in as one.

Rose, the OP did say "Before I start I want to state the obvious that I'm sure there are many, many excellent independent ladies out there. I just - with a comic run of bad luck - have managed to run into horror after horror."

Judging from these boards and stories from clients there are as many lousy independent girls out there as there are great ones.

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I imagine if a girl creates her own website, and runs the operation like a small business, you would probably find a decent independant, but when someone is running up a profile on **, in five minutes, you are unlikely to have a positive experience. I have visited over 20 independants, and all have been the type that silenty buzzed you up the stairs, and after a fairly rubbish experience, you arent even offered the chance to wash your cock in the sink. Parlours by contrast offer a moulin rouge type of experience imo,greeted at the door as an old friend,the nice showers, towels, offer of coffee, nice viewing opportunities in the lounge, the walk to the room,videos if you wish, mirrors all over the place , and often cheaper than an independant.

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Sorry to hear of your troubles JustPassing

Here are my own thoughts inPassing:

[1] When phoning an independent - her voice will tell you everything you need to know. I don't know how to explain this, but if your looking at a picture of a gorgeous woman she will also sound gorgeous on the phone. If you get that spider-sense you've just be talking to somebody different, look back at that picture and realise the obvious. Politely run a mile. For my last encounter, the pictures appeared to show a smoking-hot ~25 year-old. On the phone I can remember hanging up and thinking she sounded more like she was in her 40's and had a pretty impressive smoking habit. You'd think I'd put 2 and 2 together. I didn't.

I agree that much can be gleaned from a telephone conversation but with so many variables to contend with. I suspect any conclusion is only in the mind of the caller - the punter in this case

[2] Similar to [1]. When you've talked to her on the phone, how did the conversation go or "feel". If it was "flat" or strained again be nice, but run. Big warning triangle.

Again you have a point, but just as a photo only takes a particular moment in time so does a phone call which could be entirely different with the same person 2 mins later (after hanging up)

[3] Always trust your instincts - they are telling you things you've missed eg that photo showed the lady in a lovely apartment and you've just arrived at a seriously run-down block of flats. You ignore this because you're thinking with your pants. Or worse, you are like me - an idiot thinking with their pants.

Agreed on the instincts thing - but again sometimes they can be wrong. Being rational like Mr Spock, instincts are usually based upon something tangeable in the real world as opposed to say a premonition or vision that comes out of nowhere :P

[4] You knock on the door and it's opened to reveal an absolute dive with the woman hiding behind the door. There might as well be a neon sign on the door flashing the words "bait and switch". Nothing good is going to happen here.

Many WGs open the door this way presumably because of privacy (ie dressed provocatively)

[5] Never, EVER go ahead with a punt starting from the point of "lets get this over with and get me the hell out of here". Be polite, pay for inconvenience etc but NEVER go ahead. The money you lose is immaterial - this is going to cost you a bit of your soul. It's really hard to back out when your this far committed so 9 times out of ten you're in hell. Hopefully following 1 -4 above should mean you never get this far, but I seem to mess this up every bloody time.

No comments- Since not sure if the basis to jump ship is based on how the lady looked per se and/or she has not put up a fair representation on A.W.??

[6] Treat everything on a*w with utter, utter suspicion. If you ever find what looks to be a undiscovered gem with no feedback, repeat after me - I'm being an idiot . Read between the lines. If it says "I'm in my 30's and new to this", remember that could also be translated as "my life's just gone down the pan and I'm turning to tricks in complete desperation". Even if the person has glowing feedback, again [3] trumps those. A recent punt I did with somebody from a* with perfect feedback was a nightmare, but looking back I broke 1, 2 and 4 above.

Good point but I have met with a lady from A.W. who has had no reviews , who used a false picture (albeit that the photo did present a protopype of her), had

an inaccurate profile to services provided. I know what your thinking what else could be wrong - and yet this WG was :wub::)

At the risk of getting flamed, I would also recommend parlors as the safest bet. Find a really good, well run, classy parlour (they are hard to find, but do exist). And still be exceptionally selective with the ladies there. I guess it's obvious - for a lady to be top of the tree in this environment AND make it past your super-selective radar, that - in my experience - is the best way to reduce the chance of feeling how I feel now.

After all my rhetorical responses...Dust yourself down young man and begin again :) . I know many of the commentators here will also say invest more

in doing your research. I have my view about that still - but it is still something worth considering - if you have not done so already.

Good luck!!

Edited by Superego

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Your advice seems to completely leave out the fact that there are plenty of established and reputable independent ladies. Please don't bung us all in as one.

Exactly. Honestly, I wonder why some men bother to punt at all.

And I always hide behind the door. It's what I do, I can't help it - it's a part of the game for me. I do however, place my fingers on the door itself so the guy knows there is a smiling slightly nervous lady hiding behind it.

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Exactly. Honestly, I wonder why some men bother to punt at all.

And I always hide behind the door. It's what I do, I can't help it - it's a part of the game for me. I do however, place my fingers on the door itself so the guy knows there is a smiling slightly nervous lady hiding behind it.

"It's what I do, I can't help it" !!

Oh Sarah

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I imagine if a girl creates her own website, and runs the operation like a small business, you would probably find a decent independant, but when someone is running up a profile on **, in five minutes, you are unlikely to have a positive experience.

I have never visited a parlour so it's impossible for me to give an opinion on their merits.

Since I started visiting ladies a few months ago I have visited 3 ladies who have their own websites and also profiles on the purple site. Only one of those sites is 100% accurate and that's one of the reasons that I've visited that lady three times so far and plan a fourth visit before the end of the year. Both the other sites were very misleading one of them very much so and I have no intention of revisiting either lady because of it.

Of the four ladies that I've seen who only have profiles on the purple site two of them were accurate and I had a very enjoyable encounter with both ladies and intend returning. The third lady's profile was 50/50 and the fourth lady's was about 90% inaccurate.

So at the moment I'm running 3 positive ; 1 maybe ; and 3 negative. Hopefully the percentages improve as I gain more experience and knowledge and my judgement improves ( along with my luck ).

I think there are a lot of factors to take into account in all areas of punting.

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Yes. Follow this mans advice.

In fact my own analysis now has me visiting only thai escorts as the only ones that can be trusted to look good and give good service.

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-dudley why would you be turned off my girls charging extra? i charge extra for a and w/s. if i didnt, everyone would want it (a especially, which being only human i can deal with a little bit at a time!)

I might budge a little on the extras thing, CG. It might not always be a deal breaker.

But it puts me off because it smacks, just a little, of the street scene, parlours, a high volume approach etc etc and that's simply not my thing and is rather at odds with the sort of relaxed GF vibe I'm after.

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How many gentlemen though are sometimes quite rude on the phone....asking lots of questions which are clearly covered in the ladies advertising, asking if they will do services they clearly say they don't...oh please my willy is really small, please let me do anal...or haggling? Or just generally being very abrupt and pushy,. I always try and be polite on the phone and professional however I do adhere to the adage of respect going both ways.

I must admit to calling people love on the phone but being a Yorkshire girl its just a term of affection I use in day to day life,its not meant in an up myself kind of way.

My advice is always take your time to read the ladies advert/website/reviews and when you make the initial phonecall be clear, concise and polite. Same as on the actual punt turn up with the attitude of having a mutual good time. There are some cracking indy ladies out there and some great resources to find out the information you want about her.

So don't give up on indies, we are not all wanting to fleece you and give you a bad time!

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Sound advice, JP.

Across scores of meetings with independents, I've never once had a bad experience. I avoid:

- Those who charge too low

- Those who have very poor English

- Those whose pictures indicate a complete lack of thought as to the impression they're creating

- Those below the (claimed) age of 23

- Those who charge for extras

- Those whose skin tone/appearance might indicate drug use, ill-health, an excessively hard life lol etc etc

- Those too keen to stress how horny they are

- Those too keen to stress how very lady-like and sophisticated they are

- Those without reviews

On the back of that, those escorts who I've seen have been smart, friendly, sexy, and (seemingly) doing the job more through choice than desperation.

Omg by what this says then i should be screwed o.O i hit 2 of your points lol im 22 (yes im actually 22) and i don't have reviews (i don't book over the booking system, it bugs me) But like most people have said in here, think with your brain and not your cock, at the end of the day the brain will keep you out of trouble (hopefully)

Panda -x-

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Exactly. Honestly, I wonder why some men bother to punt at all.

And I always hide behind the door. It's what I do, I can't help it - it's a part of the game for me. I do however, place my fingers on the door itself so the guy knows there is a smiling slightly nervous lady hiding behind it.

I like that idea I must try it when I have an outcall with a girl I have never met before, should get her heart rate going :)

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Most of the girls I see tend to be agency girls, but occasionally I do see indie girls. These have all been memorable encounters, and I've never had a problem with the indie scene.

But reading the OP and a couple of replies, there's a vital ingredient missing which the punter must do when planning to see a WG whether she be indie, agency or parlour based ....... and that is doing the homework before hand. Its a necessity. Trusting your instincts whilst trawling thru the purple site is not enough. Any girl that you're planning to see for the 1st time has to backed up by doing the necessary homework and that means checking the FRs on this site and then making your decision. ;)

I know that this approach will rule out any girls new to the scene who therefore haven't had the chance to build up FRs yet, and many of those girls will be diamonds, but if you're the type of punter who has the unfortunate experience of having one too many awful encounters with WGs, then its best to move on to an established WG who has FRs to back up her service and give the newbie WG time to build up her credentials (via FRs).

If you do your homework properly, then the chances of having a disasterous punt are greatly reduced :cool:

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How many gentlemen though are sometimes quite rude on the phone....asking lots of questions which are clearly covered in the ladies advertising, asking if they will do services they clearly say they don't...oh please my willy is really small, please let me do anal...or haggling? Or just generally being very abrupt and pushy,. I always try and be polite on the phone and professional however I do adhere to the adage of respect going both ways.

I must admit to calling people love on the phone but being a Yorkshire girl its just a term of affection I use in day to day life,its not meant in an up myself kind of way.

My advice is always take your time to read the ladies advert/website/reviews and when you make the initial phonecall be clear, concise and polite. Same as on the actual punt turn up with the attitude of having a mutual good time. There are some cracking indy ladies out there and some great resources to find out the information you want about her.

So don't give up on indies, we are not all wanting to fleece you and give you a bad time!

First of all Bibi I think I must apologise for lumping " love " in with " darling and sweetheart ". Where I live, which us also where I was born and bred, it is used a lot as a term of endearment as well as a casual throwaway line whereas the other two are not.

Your comments about the phone calls are accurate as well. Keep it polite, courteous and professional on both sides. Show the lady from the manner of your enquiry that you have actually got past the rates/gallery pages and read the information that she has probably taken considerable time to prepare.

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