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FigureFour

When Punting And Real-Life Clash

31 posts in this topic

Hello All

I am currently facing a bit of a dilemma that hits a bit too close to home for my comfort and was wondering how to navigate it so things stay as they are with my punting life remaining unexposed.

Out of habit, I would see a regular every few months / quarterly or so that does escorting part-time (who despite possessing attractive qualities is not really my type) and recently have found out that she (along with another woman who does escorting) has become best friends with a close relative of mine that is aware of my past punting activities (though as far as I know they are unaware of my recent punting escapades of the past few years or so).

Adding to the whole situation is the fact that a friend of mine has “befriended” (to what extent I cannot yet say) her roommate with all 3 of them knowing my relative’s womanising ex who has recently started to hang out with my group of friends.

While I know that I can count on her being discreet and have little inclination / intention in finding another regular (being that I only see her a few times a year), should I stop seeing her given the potential risks of exposure even though I seem to be getting a thrill out of it due to that very risk? Am I even obligated to tell her that there may be people we both mutually know since there is a strong chance we may bump into each other in real-life even if I stopped visiting her (given that the relative is the sort of person to connect the dots fairly quickly)?

As for my relative (depending on whether the regular has divulged the escorting side of herself to them or not), though the regular I visit escorts part-time and am aware of the fact that there is very little one can do to deter the someone from entering this realm (free-will and all), hypocritical or not I am personally not thrilled with the prospect of the relative taking up this lifestyle and have reason to believe that they may have already done so (or at least a variation of sorts).

To the experienced Ladies / Punters - How should I approach this situation so my punting life does not potentially encroach into real-life given the concerns I have for my relative's welfare or should I just simply drop the whole thing and move on in order to continue seeing the regular?

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My brain hurts. Any chance of a diagram?

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Mine too, but you just know that only real life gets this complicated !

*will come back later after giving it some thought.. or maybe not*

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Ok, here are the basics.

1 - A regular who I visit now and again has become best friends with a relative of mine (who knows about my past punting) and I have reason to believe the relative has taken up this lifestyle.

2 - The relative in question does not possess the maturity this lifestyle requires (for both punters and escorts) and am concerned for their welfare.

3 - Additionally, a friend of mine has "befriended" my regular's roomate with all 3 of them knowing my relative's ex who recently hangs out with my group.

4 - I fear a situation developing where my punting life is exposed yet I still want to continue visiting my regular though at the same time I also want to deter my relative from taking on this lifestyle, which would risk my punting being exposed.

5 - Advice needed.

Is that good enough?

Edited by FigureFour

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Talk to your regular lady. Talking is good. Simples :D

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There was an american tv series, back in the eighties I think, that was a parody of the "soap opera" that was itself called " SOAP". After the usual recap at the beginning of what had occurred in previous episodes the male voice over came on with the tagline " confused? you will be! ".

I think I need a few sheets of blank paper, pencil and pencil sharpener and some considerable time with this one. Best of luck FigureFour. The grass may be greener on the other side of the hill but not this time!!

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Ok, here are the basics.

1 - A regular who I visit now and again has become best friends with a relative of mine (who knows about my past punting) and I have reason to believe the relative has taken up this lifestyle.

2 - The relative in question does not possess the maturity this lifestyle requires (for both punters and escorts) and am concerned for their welfare.

3 - Additionally, a friend of mine has "befriended" my regular's roomate with all 3 of them knowing my relative's ex who recently hangs out with my group.

4 - I fear a situation developing where my punting life is exposed yet I still want to continue visiting my regular though at the same time I also want to deter my relative from taking on this lifestyle, which would risk my punting being exposed.

5 - Advice needed.

Is that good enough?

Please don't get annoyed FigureFour. There are plenty of very nice people who use this forum who are only too happy to give genuine helpful advice to anyone with a problem. I've benefitted from it myself on more than one occasion.

You just have to look at the difference between your first and second post to see why you received flippant responses. Your second post is an excellent example of how to set out your predicament perfectly. Bullet points. Clear. Concise. Easy to read. Well prepared

Unfortunately your first post was a rambling story that was not that easy to follow particularly early in the morning. I'm sure you will now receive plenty of well meant advice. What you ultimately decide to do or not do is up to you of course.

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Please don't get annoyed FigureFour. There are plenty of very nice people who use this forum who are only too happy to give genuine helpful advice to anyone with a problem. I've benefitted from it myself on more than one occasion.

You just have to look at the difference between your first and second post to see why you received flippant responses. Your second post is an excellent example of how to set out your predicament perfectly. Bullet points. Clear. Concise. Easy to read. Well prepared

Unfortunately your first post was a rambling story that was not that easy to follow particularly early in the morning. I'm sure you will now receive plenty of well meant advice. What you ultimately decide to do or not do is up to you of course.

Hey! *looks at Gibbs hard*

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I would think you need to chat with your regular before you bump into her in a real life situation, so at least she's prepared for it if it happens!! Also....if you did decide it's far too risky to keep seeing her, at least she would know why.

And also, she would understand hopefully that when you book to see her, she can't be in a flat with your relative there when you walk in :eek: You need to take extra precautions to know you won't ever be disturbed accidentally!!

Edited by partylover

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Dissuading your friend from taking up this pursuit is not very fair if that is purely out of your own interests, if you are that concerned then it's up to you to stop your own punting.

If you think you are going to meet in public then it can be a good idea to put this to the lady you see, so you are both prepared and brief each other on the name(s) which will be used then neither of you commits a gaff or faux pas.

It can be a very small world at times and this is a risk you run however everyone has their own life, and is entitled to get on with it unhindered.

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Hey! *looks at Gibbs hard*

Hopefully I would be. I think I'm falling in love with you Sarah! One of a long line I should think. By the way that catsuit looks great. Do you always wear it in a morning? Also if you would open the blinds a little more I would appreciate it. Please!

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I would find a new regular, talk to your existing regular and say that you will be visiting less frequently due to the recession and then keep a low profile.

It may all blow over.

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I don't really follow all the details but most people will act in their own best interest if give the opportunity,

It seems to be the best interest of most of the people you mention is to keep this all discrete.

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In my opinion if you don't want your punting exploits known about town you stop seeing any of these people and punt a bit further out! It all sounds a bit close for comfort. As for your relative, as long as they are of age then there's not much you can do. She (I assume it's a she) will make her own decisions and won't thank you for interfering.

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most people will act in their own best interest

Now that although on the face of it might seem very harsh is very good advice. There are occasions for everyone when however sympathetic or otherwise they feel that the only course of action is to out themselves first.

In my opinion if you don't want your punting exploits known about town you stop seeing any of these people and punt a bit further out! It all sounds a bit close for comfort. As for your relative, as long as they are of age then there's not much you can do. She (I assume it's a she) will make her own decisions and won't thank you for interfering.

Another two pieces of good advice.

Edited by gibbs

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Ok, here are the basics.

1 - A regular who I visit now and again has become best friends with a relative of mine (who knows about my past punting) and I have reason to believe the relative has taken up this lifestyle.

2 - The relative in question does not possess the maturity this lifestyle requires (for both punters and escorts) and am concerned for their welfare.

3 - Additionally, a friend of mine has "befriended" my regular's roomate with all 3 of them knowing my relative's ex who recently hangs out with my group.

4 - I fear a situation developing where my punting life is exposed yet I still want to continue visiting my regular though at the same time I also want to deter my relative from taking on this lifestyle, which would risk my punting being exposed.

5 - Advice needed.

Is that good enough?

My advice is bin the regular, that is now too dangerous to continue with and you would be very unwise to see her again in my view. As to your relative assuming she is over 18 and thus an adult its her business what she does. Obviously you could try giving her some advice but who knows how she might react. If her family dont know she is a WG you are in the assured nuclear destruction scenario with her, i imagine she wont say anything if you dont if thats a possible concern.

Edited by smiths

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Not sure my fivepenneth worth will help but I think you need to distance yourself from the situation altogether. When my brother found out what I was doing he went mental, his attitude was very similair to yours and I know he had my best interests at heart but..... I'm grown adult that can and will make my own choices in life as are you (you choose to punt and I'll bet there are members of your family that aren't happy about that either), I was angry that he chose to interfer and it put my back up. If you feel that you must get involved and seriously are concerned about this relative then maybe take them for a drink (always better in unfamilair surroundings) and talk to them, gently and voice your concerns but be very careful that you don't come across as being judgemental. If they still choose to go ahead then point them in the direction of saafe and understand that its down to them as an adult to make their own choices and mistakes in life.

By the way this job is nowhere near as bad as people seem to think and as long as all measures are taken to stay safe, it can be damn good fun and is a good living.

Good luck and please let us know how it pans out.

Holly x

Edited by Holly Maddison

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Get out, stay out. live and let live.

not your business. and keep it that way.

safer (sorry if this sounds a bit cowardish, but safety first)

Similar case here?

26yo niece of Mrs Ptr. very pretty, curvy, and a real boy-magnet since highschool, and she knew it, and used to laugh at it (she was our live-in babysit for a while too). Dropped out of uni. used to sit at checkout counters in supermarket, did some table-waiting in restaurants/cafes at night (undeclared, for extra cash). She looks and behaves quite normal, but is a Stunner all the same, and she still knows it.

Suddenly move up into very posh appartment, is now driving a very large, sporty car, and has a boyfriend with dodgy connections.

She is also very good to her sister who is a single mum struggling (sad case, dont ask).

Says it is all due to the great tips men give her....

I dont ask.

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Get out, stay out. live and let live.

not your business. and keep it that way.

safer (sorry if this sounds a bit cowardish, but safety first)

Similar case here?

26yo niece of Mrs Ptr. very pretty, curvy, and a real boy-magnet since highschool, and she knew it, and used to laugh at it (she was our live-in babysit for a while too). Dropped out of uni. used to sit at checkout counters in supermarket, did some table-waiting in restaurants/cafes at night (undeclared, for extra cash). She looks and behaves quite normal, but is a Stunner all the same, and she still knows it.

Suddenly move up into very posh appartment, is now driving a very large, sporty car, and has a boyfriend with dodgy connections.

She is also very good to her sister who is a single mum struggling (sad case, dont ask).

Says it is all due to the great tips men give her....

I dont ask.

You just stereotyped your own niece! Wow!

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Rule 1

Dont shit on your own doorstep.

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Thanks for the advice; the rambling first post was just me being overtired and not thinking straight.

It is worth mentioning that due to my own circumstances my family are aware to some degree that I have engaged in punting in the past and thus have a rather liberal attitude considering they are pretty traditional, I accept that there is little I can do with regard to my relative even though I do not like the situation (assuming the relative has indeed embraced this lifestyle).

I have very high regard for women who Escort and have stated so here in past threads, what bothers me is the fact that I’d rather NOT know that my relative (who knows I’ve punted in the past) has also embraced this lifestyle let alone have her become aware of the fact that I regularly visit her best friend.

The other wildcards in all this are my mate who has recently befriended my regular’s roommate and the relative’s ex who is starting to hang out with my group.

I will talk this through with the regular when I next visit her about what to do in the event that we see each other in real-life and will gradually stop seeing her while I look for another regular, as at least I'd be able to do some pre-emptive damage control in the event that the situation gets out of hand.

Edited by FigureFour

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Thanks for the advice; the rambling first post was just me being overtired and not thinking straight.

It is worth mentioning that due to my own circumstances my family are aware to some degree that I have engaged in punting in the past and thus have a rather liberal attitude considering they are pretty traditional, I accept that there is little I can do with regard to my relative even though I do not like the situation (assuming the relative has indeed embraced this lifestyle).

I have very high regard for women who Escort and have stated so here in past threads, what bothers me is the fact that I’d rather NOT know that my relative (who knows I’ve punted in the past) has also embraced this lifestyle let alone have her become aware of the fact that I regularly visit her best friend.

The other wildcards in all this are my mate who has recently befriended my regular’s roommate and the relative’s ex who is starting to hang out with my group.

I will talk this through with the regular when I next visit her about what to do in the event that we see each other in real-life and will gradually stop seeing her while I look for another regular, as at least I'd be able to do some pre-emptive damage control in the event that the situation gets out of hand.

It's not uncommon for men to look upon women who aren't related, completely differently to those who are related to them(and I don't mean the fact you aren't supposed to have sex with family members) for some the switch can be remarkable.

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Figure Four

What is the benefit of seeing the regular ...

How does it compare with (long term) problems of having your hobby "outed" with your relatives?

Your call ...

regrds

J

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Get out, stay out. live and let live.

not your business. and keep it that way.

safer (sorry if this sounds a bit cowardish, but safety first)

Similar case here?

26yo niece of Mrs Ptr. very pretty, curvy, and a real boy-magnet since highschool, and she knew it, and used to laugh at it (she was our live-in babysit for a while too). Dropped out of uni. used to sit at checkout counters in supermarket, did some table-waiting in restaurants/cafes at night (undeclared, for extra cash). She looks and behaves quite normal, but is a Stunner all the same, and she still knows it.

Suddenly move up into very posh appartment, is now driving a very large, sporty car, and has a boyfriend with dodgy connections.

She is also very good to her sister who is a single mum struggling (sad case, dont ask).

Says it is all due to the great tips men give her....

I dont ask.

Well, no, who would need to? As a matter of curiosity, what is Mrs Ptr's interpretation of events?

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High regard for those that escort - boy thats big of you...... IT's The Person That Matters - you can get numpties in all walks of life, and likewise you can get some great people. You are looking way too deep into this and need to take a step back. Dont get involved as if you do then it will bite back. These things always have a habot of doing so and maybe you will learn to play AWAY from home ! keep that distance and dont let it get heavy.

I had a friend a while back that decided to go down the escorting route - in a pickle and then realised just how much she could make doing tricks. I had some deep thought about this and if its good for me to go and have fun then its just as good for missie to get money, were just at different ends of the transaction. She was a close friend of the family daughter of a friend of the parents - so quite close. Like previous she was a stunner and went to uni then struggled a bit came home and took a while to get back on track - she met up with when she was escorting a girl that I had an arrangement with and that chilled my blood.

Anyways I had a session with 'donna' and during that session she had a visit from her friend who knew me - just turned up at the door and when she came in I looked at her and she looked at me. What do you do ? anyways we had a bit of a talk about things and we both knew about each other then and left it at that. But these things can happen and you need to be careful.

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