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Curious Rose

The Way We Discuss Service Providers

53 posts in this topic

Lately I've noticed that some around here seem to forget they're talking about real human beings (with feelings) when they're describing their experiences with service providers. Now I have no problem with anyone saying that they didn't click with someone, or were scammed, misled or ripped off (or making other fair criticisms) -- but nasty comments about highly subjective aspects of a lady's appearance or behaviour strike me as unnecessary.

Funnily enough, when it's about me I'm only mildly irritated, but reading nasty remarks about ladies I know personally has really upset me! In the past I've seen girls cry their eyes out over cruel, dehumanising comments about their bodies and personalities on here. I urge people to think about what they're saying.

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I don't really like it when guys talk of 'using' WGs - surely it'd be nicer to say they 'visit' WGs instead?

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Lately I've noticed that some around here seem to forget they're talking about real human beings (with feelings) when they're describing their experiences with service providers. Now I have no problem with anyone saying that they didn't click with someone, or were scammed, misled or ripped off (or making other fair criticisms) -- but nasty comments about highly subjective aspects of a lady's appearance or behaviour strike me as unnecessary.

Funnily enough, when it's about me I'm only mildly irritated, but reading nasty remarks about ladies I know personally has really upset me! In the past I've seen girls cry their eyes out over cruel, dehumanising comments about their bodies and personalities on here. I urge people to think about what they're saying.

I am not so bothered these days but I know what you mean. When it first happens it can be very upsetting. I have stopped crying over what people say these days I let it all wash over me and SMILE

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I admit its a grey area between being honest and reviewing an experience with a service provider for the benefit for punters and giving public feedback that the girl herself may get pointed out to her or read herself. Not all may be exactly what she hopes to hear.

I admit theres been girls who even with glowing feedback and FRs, were just a dissapointment when I met them.. Others I thought were fantastic and then other people said the opposite.

Its a thin line when we are trying to give feedback on an expensive but very personal service. No client wants to leave dissapointed and should know what to expect...but then no SP wants to be publicly personally criticised about her personality, physical attriubutes or her sexual technique

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People shouldn't be cruel, they shouldn't set out to insult or give deliberately false information, but sometimes speaking frankly can sound harsh, just giving the facts as one understands them so that some other punter has the objective information he needs to decide if he should visit a particular SP might sound unkind to the lady concerned.

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Maybe some guys are just undiplomatic or incapable of writing sensitively?

Like Overworked, I've booked a girl on the strength of several glowing FRs, but found on the day she was mediocre. It really is down to personal preferences and how you click on the day - or not.

I'm not an avid FR writer, but if I really like the girl, then she get the full FR, not just a positive on AW, but I'd never tear a girl to shreds verbally in an FR, there's a diplomatic way of saying your time was not one of the best. Or just say nothing at all, perhaps? Even, so there are punters who want to rubbish certain WGs for their own perverse reasons.

In a similar vein, I cannot fathom out why people have to jump on the tweet or facebook bandwagon. I dont use social networking and have no plans to. It's such a waste of time, and of limited interest.

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People shouldn't be cruel, they shouldn't set out to insult or give deliberately false information, but sometimes speaking frankly can sound harsh, just giving the facts as one understands them so that some other punter has the objective information he needs to decide if he should visit a particular SP might sound unkind to the lady concerned.

I think part of the problem lies in the difficulty of separating the service from the provider, especially when the service is such an intimate one. It's very difficult to be critical of someone who puts every effort into trying to provide a good service when the end result is disappointing: after all, that may be down as much to the service seeker as provider. On the other hand, if someone clearly does not provide what they say they will or makes no effort to do so, it is easier then to give critical feedback.

Apart from that, I just don't think it's possible to provide 'objective information' where there are so many variables, personal preferences and simply things about a girl which may appeal to me but not to anyone else

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I think the criticism and the comments about physical appearance of a lady could and should be discussed in reviews? General comments on a message forum can be construed as sheer rudeness when the lady reads sometimes wholly innacurate info on herself.

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On a similar vein:

Is it time I stopped referring to escorts as WG's and started using SP as per a lot of posts?

I prefer Working Girl purely because Service Provider sounds clinical and be used for any business (indeed, I'm a service provider) whereas there's a hint of sexiness about WG. I'll change if it's what the ladies (and the forum) prefer.

DG

Edited by Diamond Geezer

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On a similar vein:

Is it time I stopped referring to escorts as WG's and started using SP as per a lot of posts?

I prefer Working Girl purely because Service Provider sounds clinical and be used for any business (indeed, I'm a service provider) whereas there's a hint of sexiness about WG. I'll change if it's what the ladies (and the forum) prefer.

DG

You should post as you see fit. I think we are women not girls am tending to use either SP or 'ladies' these days.

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Hi all

Couldn't agree with Rose more re feelings

When mentioning a SP I usually refer to them as "the lady" and I for one would never be outrightlt rude to them in this forum

Lets face it, it is meant to be a two way deal and when both parties click and walk away from something that has got a benefit for both, thats great

Yes both sides have feeling and lets always respect that and not lower our standards because of the way people earn a living or the way some guys spend their money

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Respect is given and taken by all usually, and so it should be, after all a guy is not always wanting to be called babe or hun all the time.

Im 60 and still get called that by some ladies, and its just a term they use I know for everyone, so I just accept it, but its not a true feeling of the escort, after all im not a babe, or their hun.

Yes I agree that when writing a fr people should always be aware of how it is going to read to others, and try to give an honest opinion without hurtfull feelings. I tend to keep my reports healthy and intresting, and give a bit of detail without describing the lady too much, after all it was my choice to see the lady and if she is as she said on her rofile, then why shoild I criticise her for being whom she is, after all im sure some ladies would say im less than an adonis, and I might be respectful, but I might fart if I cant help it.

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Aye, I usually talk about the lady or ladies I've visited. It's just when I'm referring globally to the "Hobby" I'll sometimes refer to WG's.

DG

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In a similar vein, I cannot fathom out why people have to jump on the tweet or facebook bandwagon. I dont use social networking and have no plans to. It's such a waste of time, and of limited interest.

I don't understand the connection here :unsure:

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It's a very difficult one, Rose!

How do you balance the honest reporting that you owe to fellow punters with an awareness and sensitivity to a WGs feelings should she ever come across what you've written about her publicly?

I'm sure the equilibrium lies in the reporters expressing very carefully the negative aspects, perhaps by using hints, couching it in carefully-worded language along with fulsome praise of the things that were great.

On the ladies part, I think it is beneficial for her to develop a thick skin as far as these things are concerned, she's not going to please all the people all the time. Of course, feedback, even when negative, is helpful as it gives you the opportunity to make improvement. Sadly, I think this career is not well-suited to the hyper-sensitive and those lacking self-confidence.

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On a similar vein:

Is it time I stopped referring to escorts as WG's and started using SP as per a lot of posts?

I prefer Working Girl purely because Service Provider sounds clinical and be used for any business (indeed, I'm a service provider) whereas there's a hint of sexiness about WG. I'll change if it's what the ladies (and the forum) prefer.

DG

Thats up to you DG. I will continue to use WG and SP sometimes when referring to Establishments. Being honest without being personally abusive is what i will also continue being.

If i have something to post i post it as i see fit within the rules, punting involves positives and negatives on occassion so if posters wish to discuss either its their business. No need to be insulting but if your lied to you may wish to inform other posters of that.

Overall though most posters are great and there are certainly less problems that i see across the forum nowadays than there used to be in all my time as a member. :)

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I agree. I used to be so sensitive about things people would say about me when I first started in this industry. Now, jeez, say what you like, you can't please everyone all the time. I think personally, I am at an age and confidence in myself, and if people want to say horrible things, then who am I to stop them. Every one is entitled to express their own opinions, this is of course a PUNTER website, so punters should be allowed to state what they thought about their experiences. Of course some are cynical, foul mouthed little sh!ts that have no respect for a "WG's" feelings, but those types are the MINORITY after reading loads of forums on here. If you want to read really harsh opinions of escorts, there are other sites on the web that have posts from contributors that do not hold back at all! So this site is quite tame to be honest.

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I agree. I used to be so sensitive about things people would say about me when I first started in this industry. Now, jeez, say what you like, you can't please everyone all the time. I think personally, I am at an age and confidence in myself, and if people want to say horrible things, then who am I to stop them. Every one is entitled to express their own opinions, this is of course a PUNTER website, so punters should be allowed to state what they thought about their experiences. Of course some are cynical, foul mouthed little sh!ts that have no respect for a "WG's" feelings, but those types are the MINORITY after reading loads of forums on here. If you want to read really harsh opinions of escorts, there are other sites on the web that have posts from contributors that do not hold back at all! So this site is quite tame to be honest.

Maybe I'm a fluffy then but I like it here. I've browsed UKP occasionally but never had the urge to join. I have joined a couple of regional places just for local info but this is the best place as far I'm concerned.

DG

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I urge people to think about what they're saying.

In my trade we often get exasperated by clients' almost total inability to distinguish between bad advice and unwelcome advice. I think that you are, with justice, making exactly the same point.

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On the whole I find most guys are respectful and do realise that one mans meat is another mans poison. You will always get those that see SP's as nothing more than commodities (thats putting it nicely was going to put spunk buckets). I do think men forget sometimes that chemistry plays a big part in a punt and its not all about looks, so they should remember that if they were dissapointed in a lady that has good reviews, it may be that the chemistry just isn't there for them whilst it is for others.

Its hard to cope with when your first starting out and can be upsetting when you read personal stuff about yourself if its derogatory, but after a while you start to realise that for every guy that is unhappy with you there are at least ten that aren't. A thick skin is definately needed in this business thats for sure.

Edited by Holly Maddison

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I agree with Rose completely. Honesty of course is needed in a field report and when reviewing a girl. But rather than absolutely slating a girls appearance/personality you should probably think how you phrase things. Such as not clicking or finding her not as attractive in pictures sounds better than destroying every little or large flaw a working lady may have in graphic detail.

Cx

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I am not so bothered these days but I know what you mean. When it first happens it can be very upsetting. I have stopped crying over what people say these days I let it all wash over me and SMILE

Is it extra to let it all wash over you whilst you smile? :blink:

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Aye, I usually talk about the lady or ladies I've visited. It's just when I'm referring globally to the "Hobby" I'll sometimes refer to WG's.

Same here, I think. I use WG as it seemed to be a convention of this forum, but if the ladies here would prefer SP then I'll use that instead (even though I think it sounds a bit too businesslike).

If you write what you'd be prepared to say to someone face-to-face then you probably won't go far wrong, unless you're an ignorant bugger face-to-face as well. Not being able to those you're writing about, and a username providing anonymity, does seem to rob some people of their courtesy and sensitivity when on the internet.

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On a similar vein:

Is it time I stopped referring to escorts as WG's and started using SP as per a lot of posts?

I prefer Working Girl purely because Service Provider sounds clinical and be used for any business (indeed, I'm a service provider) whereas there's a hint of sexiness about WG. I'll change if it's what the ladies (and the forum) prefer.

DG

The GUM clinic refer to 'sex workers' - Nothing offensive about that (in my opinion) because that is what they are. It's a nonsense fo people to be offended by correct terminology such as prostitute, escort, working girl, service provider.

However, I do agree that some people can be unecessarily hurtful when relating their opinion on a SWs appearance and I find this unreasonable unless she is significantly different to photos in their profile.

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In my trade we often get exasperated by clients' almost total inability to distinguish between bad advice and unwelcome advice. I think that you are, with justice, making exactly the same point.

I understand the first sentence but... this is a service like no other - you surely agree with that? It's not about advice - it's about criticism on a strictly personal level and that is where feelings get hurt. I also understand why a punter might feel aggrieved if a WG is not representative of her images or does not provide the service that she says or infers she will provide, but again I say this could be cleared up in a review and not on a message forum where said lady posts and more importantly reads.............. ;) ... and gets hurt.

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