brothelcreeper

Brothel Living: A Civilians Perspective (Pt 1 Of 6)

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Brothel living; insights, anecdotes and stats

 

I live in a Brothel. I have lived in Brothels for 2 years. I came as a punter and never left I guess. The full story I’ll get to... probably.  Some details are changed to protect, well, the guilty really. 

 

It’s suited me. In the sense that it’s allowed me to retrain and entirely switch professions, without the burden of rent. I pay none. And I don’t pay bills. And I don’t pay for food. And I don’t pay for sex, not that much of that happens anyway these days.  Personally speaking obviously. There’s a whole load of sex going on generally within earshot most of the time.

 

From a legal perspective, I’m a pimp. I live off immoral earnings. Or rather I benefit from immoral earnings.  I reassure myself that I think I could argue the case in a court of law. I don’t take money. I can prove that I make enough money to live – just. And I exert no pressure on anyone to work. I’m a benign presence. And there is an unwritten contract that makes me the go-to person for any number of tasks in a given day. I’ll bore you with the extraordinary breadth of these later. But in return I get a free place to stay. A place that is centrally located, well appointed, but at times fucking annoying to live in. In fact, it’s mostly fucking annoying to live in. But it’s free. 

 

Also I would claim (not that I’d take this route in court) that how the word "pimp" is used in the common vernacular, that I am far from a classical pimp. I do not own a fur coat. Or any gold in any medallion formats. I do not wear sunglasses at night. I am not Shaft or Ice T. I am not black. I do not wear flared trousers.

 

It is of course ridiculous  that the stereotype of black, fur coat wearing, disco-loving pimps endures in the collective imagination of popular culture (ok maybe just mine then)

 

In all my exposure to the underworld of hookers, pimps, drug dealers, amateur taxi drivers with an eye on any chances, food sellers who sell exclusively to w.g’s, escort agency owners and their money collectors, organised crime syndicates, disorganized gangsters, the removal guys you call when you need to move flats quick who specialize in w.g’s, men who think they are w.g boyfriends, robbers who target w.g’s, robbers who target anyone, psychos, vibrator and condom sellers, dodgy estate agents, landlords and fake landlords who represent landlords who “know” but don’t want to know and fucking rental agents who keep deposits and never fix anything because they know they don’t have to, and the Adultwork emails where a "customer" asks you repeatedly to look at pictures of his cum and “is it an average quantity, would you say in your experience, don’t worry, be honest?” and the furious neighbors who fear the neighborhood in decline but then also just want free sex, and the guys you can call and then send £13,000 who can get a girl in the country with fake boobs instead of visas and then there are fake Doctors with fake Botox, and fake doctors with real Botox, and skin lighteners, and lotions and oils and truckloads of shower gel  and Amway agents selling stuff to you (toothpaste £7?!) , and fixers and go-getters who do anything for 20 quid, and tax free cigarette sellers and the "I can get you an i-phone on a contract for a one off cost" people and the amateur escort agency wannabees and their web build guys and the sheer incompetence with which this business is largely run, and the girls that think giving a girl one of her customers phone number without even asking him makes her eligible for £50 every hour if he ever books and loan sharks, and the professional Adultwork aggregators and w.g photographers and their hangers on, and the customer handymen who come and put a shelf up who have clearly never ever put a shelf up and they want a blowjob, and husbands for sale, yes really husbands for sale and is it worth £8000? Shit it could be prison if they catch you, and visa lawyers to work their magic if you came illegally but want to stay and live happily ever after in a 2 up, 2 down in Bolton with your new husband who does not yet know that 2 weeks after the honeymoon he’ll never see his wife again as she skips to a metropolis to set up shop, and Skype and Argos and the £1 shop and Selfridges and newsagents who sell scat DVD’s and Poppers that don’t work, and rental agreement lease "signers" in exchange for a one off £1000 of course, and building security guards who take the £50 a week and laugh, and the fucking building communal area cleaners who ask for a Xmas box, and the angry ex-customers who stalk, and write letters and book fake appointments  and contact aged family back home to poison memories and sadden lives that have been hard enough already, and the real boyfriends – the ones they loved who ALWAYS ALWAYS take the money and run, and the customers who say they’ll pay afterwards, yes after I have fucked you in the arse and here is my phone as security, and I’m rich goddammit and we know how that ends, and the convenience stores where the proprietor wants to leer and touch and the girls go along with it, and the sending money to Thailand amateur Western Union types, and the bloody timewasters oh the bloody timewasters and various leeches and chancers, and girls who have stopped work but work anyway and the husbands who think they are real husbands, and the girls who think they have real husbands but who have to work anyway…….and everyone is  trying to make a margin, taking a cut, or get a blowjob, or cop a feel, or make a living, boosting the GDP and its messy and interesting and repugnant and it’s tiring and it is the orbit of a lot of w.g’s but specifically the ones I have known and live with, the Thai girls and ladyboys who came here to fuck to make money for themselves and in most cases to support their families. 

 

Anyway,,,

 

And not a single one of these buggers has been black. Not one. Hardly any of the customers either. Because the girls in the main don’t want to see them! Which is partly to be blamed on ignorant prejudiced nonsense but also partly as the myth endures that black guys are more likely to be dangerous and criminal and potentially violent.  What irony indeed, when they are in fact the only color absent from the kaleidoscope of people circling them in their daily life. Alanis my love, that is ironic. 

 

Next - Part 2 Money

 

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Wow, a this could be the sequel to Ivrine Welsh's "Porno", it comes across just like a Renton monologue (take that as a big compliment!).

 

I look forward to reading the next installment.

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This is brilliant. Eagerly awaiting the next instalment.

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What can i say, Wow!!. Very good reading, if a little sad at what the girls have to put up with and everything that goes on. All who want a cut.

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Always good to see stereotypes challenged and dismantled, and you sir have done it in an engrossing literary style.

 

I'm gonna put down my copy of the Olesia Anderson Thrillers and await your next posting ^_^

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A real eye-opener, thanks for sharing!

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Beautiful - you are going to do the cause of protitution no end of good my friend.

 

When does the book come out?

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It is poor writing , it may be a deliberate style but lacking in spaces to take a mental breath and a solid block of text is not encouraging to read. Also for all the plaudits so far gathered it is just a single opinion with no supporting information. Like many circumstances it would depend on where this was located.

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God, this takes me back to when I first started working for an agency that belonged in essence to a brothel but the agency was only a 'sister company' and nothing to do with the brothel of course, but the woman who was the receptionist at the brothel who ran the agency (who poached the girls who came for work in the brothel who subsequently ran off with the fees) had two sets of books (and a shredder) - one for herself and one to show to the boss to prove she was not ripping him off big time............... oh yes!  I can identify with all of the above and more.  Next page please !

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Wow, a this could be the sequel to Ivrine Welsh's "Porno", it comes across just like a Renton monologue (take that as a big compliment!).

 

I look forward to reading the next installment.

 

Though you won't get Kelly McDonald when the film of the book comes out.

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God, this takes me back to when I first started working for an agency that belonged in essence to a brothel but the agency was only a 'sister company' and nothing to do with the brothel of course, but the woman who was the receptionist at the brothel who ran the agency (who poached the girls who came for work in the brothel who subsequently ran off with the fees) had two sets of books (and a shredder) - one for herself and one to show to the boss to prove she was not ripping him off big time............... oh yes!  I can identify with all of the above and more.  Next page please !

Jeezus I have worked in several brothels and half of that lot I cant identify with in the least. It does make for amusing reading though

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Jeezus I have worked in several brothels and half of that lot I cant identify with in the least. It does make for amusing reading though

Chloe if he doesn't write a page 2 I can do it for him - including the girls who could not speak one word of English but stuck their tongues out and licked their top lips very fast to show the punters they would do it BB and of course - all of their passports in the safe.  I witnessed bad brothel keeping (or is that typical) at first hand.  It was my initiation into this industry.  I did not work in the brothel - but did work for the agency and had to go there to pay my fees.  I saw girls sit in there all day taking drugs to stay thin and keep awake and drinking alcohol  to relieve the boredom.  If one of them got a punter late into the shift she would actually be in debt to the house. I saw the receptionist pretend to feel sorry for these girls but go on to shop them to the benefits people if she didn't  want the bother of sacking them.

I know other girls have had better experiences than I when they first started but I had my eyes well and truly opened I can tell ya!

I saw some people making money hand over fist before they even got out of bed - sorry for the pun but these people were not doing the 'job'.  When the agency who look after sexual health came into the place to talk to the girls about their welfare they would bring boxes of free condoms and the receptionist took the lot, put the boxes into the boot of her car and  pretended she had bought them and then sold them to the girls.

Edited by Sarah Summers

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There's a lot to be said for speaking succinctly. Obviously, this chap has yet to develop this skill.

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It is poor writing , it may be a deliberate style but lacking in spaces to take a mental breath and a solid block of text is not encouraging to read. Also for all the plaudits so far gathered it is just a single opinion with no supporting information. Like many circumstances it would depend on where this was located.

I suspect somebody has started a book and is doing some market research - part 2 probably will not appear as it has not been written.

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Well I've not worked in a brothel or an agency but can still identify with a lot he says.

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Part 2 of 6

MONEY

 

“Let’s talk about sex, baby…” Actually brothel chat is largely centred on MONEY. I worked with battery hens in a huge battery hen concentration camp in the 80’s and we didn’t talk much about chickens. We did talk about sex. But what I’m getting at I suppose is that no-one really gets off on talking shop do they? Work talk is dull.  Talk is more focused; it’s all about the cash.

 

I love the fact that Thai working girls favourite shops are the £1 shop and Selfridges. Both are about money. At different ends of the spectrum obviously. Selfridges should consider a name change to the £1000shop just for the sake of clarity.

 

It would be the perfect shopping trip for Lek or Tan or P’Pa to start at Selfridges (P’ is put before any name if your older than the person who’s talking. So an older guy called Bob is called P’Bob. I’ve often hoped to for an older Peter to arrive on the scene so we can all stutter our way through P’Peter) 

 

As I was saying the perfect shopping day would be to visit both ends of the shopping spectrum. To push open the doors of Selfridges in tottering heels and eBay fur and buy the hard earned Louis Vuitton bag that is the accessory du jour of your well-to-do w.g (That is 8 facials? Or 8 cocks in arse, Or 8 cums in mouth? Is a bag worth that to you?) And with the soft brown leather bag nestling in its softer felt LV storage bag, and then in crepe paper and then in the biggest possible signature yellow Selfridges bag a short taxi ride to the Bell St £1 shop to pick up a mountain of baby wipes, and massive packs of penguin biscuits. (Older penguin biscuits would be p’penguins wouldn’t they? So it would be “ppppppick up a p’penguin”. Brilliant) 

 

That is the dream day, the dizzy zenith of the 2-5 year slog, the ”Jim’ll Fix It” letter answered (“Jim’ll Fuck It” would have been more appropriate but would have made it definitely a post 9pm watershed broadcast) Perhaps with the day ending with a 2 hour booking with an easy customer i.e one who doesn’t cum on face, fuck arse or in fact preferably cum anywhere other than in a fucking condom. That is the day when, utterly content, and having posted on Facebook 29 pictures of the bloody bag, P’Pa (she’s 34, not 24) can drift off to never-never land, perhaps even not having the recurring dream that wakes her at 4am every single night the one she has of her first husband who became her husband only because he raped her and made her pregnant when she was 14.

 

I have digressed.  And in fact further digression. They do love Primark too. And it’s almost opposite Selfridges so IDEAL ka. But all girls love Primark and it’s just a better story with the £1 shop thing. Which they do fucking love. 

 

Let’s talk hard cash.

 

And let’s try and think of it in business terms (I’ve just completed my Masters in Business Administration so I know all about business…theory. I know the theory I know fuck all about business)

 

The “Thai Girl in London Sex Business Plan” would look like this….maybe in PowerPoint would be better. But let’s press on

 

Executive Summary

 

Business Category: Sex

 

Core Proposition: Selling Sex

 

Target Consumer: Men

 

(All good so far, compelling business proposition and a bloody big target market, a market broadly unaffected by economic downturn)

 

Pricing: £150 an hour 

 

(£100 per hour volume discount or if direct to consumer with no commission to be paid perhaps as low as £100-£125) 

 

Revenues: 

 

Note on Revenues: The year below used for illustration is the mode. The mode is the most common occurring. Not the median year which would be say the 5 years revenues added up and divided by 5. 

 

The mode I’ve calculated as taking the 5 years, 3 of them look like the below. It is safe to say the first year is much busier than this and also that the last year (not that most actually plan this or plan anything actually) perhaps less busy unless they’ve found a scatty or dommy niche to offset the slow decline in looks or to offset a converse increase in impatience with “fucking stupid customers”. And finally to offset the escort agencies complete disregard for older girls who may feature on the web-site (scroll down below the fold, they are there) but who push the new girls out there in their bizarre doll like photo-shopped glory. By the way they are all 28. Not 22. 

 

Average number of 1 hour jobs per day: 3

Average number per week: 20

Average per month: 80

Total monthly revenue: £12,000

Annualised revenues: £144,000 (no tax)

Grossed up tax equivalent: £240,000 (for the purposes of comparison with a UK salary most of which are taxed at source)

Total Business Revenues (5 years in UK)

Ø £1,200,000 (£1.2million gross and tax equivalent)

@ 50 TB per £ = 60,000,000 Thai Baht

(Fuck me. In Thailand that makes you very rich. The only people that rich are politicians or crooks, which in Thailand is a synonym)

 

A few thoughts may spring through your minds. And in fact mine too. 

1. Wow

2. I may never, ever earn that much

3. Now I understand why my 2 up 2 down in Bolton wasn’t that appealing

4. I can understand the risk/reward thing. That’s a lot of cash. 

5. She will never, ever give up work for you, you poor naïve fool

 

But of course as all us professional businessmen know….ok I know I only know the theory. There is something missing in this analysis. And in fact it’s missing from the girls assessments too when they agree to come here (and it’s their call in every single instance of every single Thai girl coming here ever..Amen) 

 

It is of course the cost of doing business, its overheads.

 

 

Costs

 

Commissions Paid:

£50 of the £150 goes immediately to the agency. Scaled down for longer

Appointments but this is the rule of thumb

 

One-off costs Year 1: £30,000 to get here illegally. To be paid back when they get here. Paid back to their Sponsor, usually another girl. In fact I don’t know of a case when it isn’t another girl. It’s not usually the agencies (though it has and does happen) because they need to put some distance between themselves and how the girls got here. If they aren’t careful they’ll end up in a (A1Asian and OG style) situation where the agencies and the girls become part of a misguided “trafficking” investigation. And you go to prison for that. The Sponsor paid £13K so makes £17K over the 4-9 months it takes to pay the money back. All agreed as fair and equitable. Though everyone complains about their sponsor. But then everyone complains about fucking everything. 

 

One-off costs 3 times a year recurring: 

They move 3 times a year. It’s usually the neighbours. Or a rather unfortunately timed visit from the landlord. 

It’s the biggest fucking shag in the business. I know I have to do it all the time. £1000 to get a lease signed. And maybe £200 to pay for a man to move. The girls never pack anything. They buy a lot of stuff (for stuff read crap and detritus) its £100 on those unbreakable massive red and blue plastic zip bags alone. And yet another deposit to find. I estimate £10,000 a year minimum on lost deposits, dodgy middle men etc. 

 

Rent:

£375 - £500 a week. 

Let’s say £425 a week for the sake of argument. 

This gets you a room in a decent flat in w2. And W2 is where, as we all know, it is AT. 

425 x 52 = £22,000

 

Summary 

So let’s summarise so far.

We established revenues at £144,000 

There is no point using the tax equivalent figure for costs because this is how much money she has

So let’s take out commission to bring the figure to a probably accurate £110,000

Take out one-offs and rent and that leaves £78,000

 

We’ll have to ignore the 1st year £30K, but bear in mind the effect that would have on numbers - hugely significant

 

Other Costs:

Monthly send home minimum: £1000 x 12 = £12K 

Utilities: £400 per month x 12 = £4.8K

Food: £20 per day = £7.3K

Mobile top up: £200 per week = £10K

Theft: £1000 = £1K

Drugs and Sundries: £10K

Cosmetics, Laundry, Bathroom, Make-up: £5K 

Photography:  £750 x 2 = £1.5K

Adultwork Ads: £50 per week = £2.5K

Taxis: £7.5K

Total other costs: £61.5K leaving £17k?

 

Summary

 

This business is not a business anyone would invest in. 

The headline figures look good.  But the cash surplus after costs just isn’t there

 

The cost side of the equation is so unremittingly expensive that a girl needs to maintain the revenues of a year 1 i.e maybe 5 jobs a day to make a really decent, transformative amount of money. And imagine the impact of that kind of workload. 

 

Because let’s move out of business talk for a moment. We could forget that the work that generates the cash is not for the faint hearted. I’m not of the “these girls are all in the job because they are in some way damaged” school. They all made choices. Ok some made choices that in a way were predetermined. But in terms of being drawn to this because of trauma and early formative experiences, well some are…some aren’t …some are just well …they are doing what they feel they have to do. 

 

And they are tough. And they are so strong. And I am so full of wonder and respect for what they do for their children (and that is what it’s all about in most cases) 

 

What do they do?

 

They give up motherhood. 

The biggest fucking sacrifice imaginable.

 

They don’t just fuck to make money for their family to eat and be schooled and have a house and hopefully one day a Lexus, and for their kids to be better and more hi-so than them, they give up the years that anyone as a parent can tell you are the years that bring some unimaginable joy and meaning to your life. 

 

And well…life can be tough sometimes can’t it?

 

Next week: part 3 of 6. The Customers and The Boyfriends

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@brothelcreeper

Is that you Sammy?

Sammy Who??

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GLOL at "Jim'll Fuck It" (I know one shouldn't)

 

 

Rent:
£375 - £500 a week.
Let’s say £425 a week for the sake of argument.
This gets you a room in a decent flat in w2.

 

Surely you couldn't operate as a WG from one room in a shared house?

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Surely you couldn't operate as a WG from one room in a shared house?

I bet there are plenty who will try to do just that. Folk will be queueing up to tell us.

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I suspect somebody has started a book and is doing some market research - part 2 probably will not appear as it has not been written.

 

So your first comment before this that started 'Beautiful' was ironic? We have to be quick witted to keep up with you.

 

And then spot on with the pronouncement that the second part has not been written and probably won't appear.

 

Would you be the same Lancelot of said:

 

"In other words - I have to have to acquire a disbaility before my behaviour becomes acceptable."

 

Hope you don't get into bed with me on any topic, mate.

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