Lynn

Shortest Email Ever.

55 posts in this topic

Or can you do better?

 

I received one today which read:

 

you free now

 

no punctuation .... no anything.....

 

what a treat I must have missed there   :( 

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I get stuff like that all the ..time via email or text...'u free'?'Hi'....'Sexy'.....do they wonder why they don't get replies?

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R U avlble? is very common, though more via text than email. 

I've also had  'Where are you?' and U workin? several times via AW email. 

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These messages are daft enough if by phone text but at least we have our phones with us all the time.

 

To assume we are sitting in front of our screens every moment of every day ready to respond to emails is just plain loopy.

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I had once:

 

"outcall"

 

And I asked what time?


"9oclock"

 

Very funny, but also makes me less likely to want to accept the punter for a booking. Yikes! :P

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Is we free at last?

 

Great Gosh almighty! What has been happening  while I have been offline?

 

 

:D:D

Edited by Lynn

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Or can you do better?

 

I received one today which read:

 

you free now

 

no punctuation .... no anything.....

 

what a treat I must have missed there   :( 

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We were all kidnapped by a strange looking creature and threatened with deportation to North Korea.....

 

but Porker Paul came to the rescue and we are once again safely in the confines of PunterPalace.

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The world's shortest correspondence was between two movie moguls asking how a film did at the box office

?

!

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Haven't had any for ages but the ones who just say 'Details?' not 'Can I have some details please' or any sort of pleasant greeting, are beyond contempt. What more details do you need man, I've got plenty of details on the site, blog etc?

So when they ring and grunt 'details?' I answer back mimicking their grunt and reply 'website?' and put the phone down!

The reason they continue to do this is.... Some girls actually answer their rudeness and think this shoddy treatment is normal.

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Long may the fuckwits continue with there rudeness and dickhead behaviour, it means that people like myself who take time to craft an email get a proper reponse.

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My favourite text message to my regular wg is "are u whoring today perchance" - I always feel its the kind of text message Lord Byron would have sent had he had a mobile phone.

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no punctuation .... no anything.....

 

I think lack of punctuation by itself is a good enough reason to reject a punter. I use it to filter out AW profiles or ladies' websites. Spelling too.

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I just ignore messages with a lack of any sort of punctuation and use of terms like babe and hun.

Spelling mistakes I don't mind, as long as the message is polite. 

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My favourite, a few days ago "are you open?"

 

another was "can i get your services"

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My favourite text message to my regular wg is "are u whoring today perchance" - I always feel its the kind of text message Lord Byron would have sent had he had a mobile phone.

That would make me howl! That's right, he would say it just so!

I have a funny visitor who asks if he can come for 'a bounce in the boudoir' haha.

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I am afraid many women forget some basic facts about many men.

Firstly we are bred and conditioned to have huge difficulties in communicated and many of us take decades to grow out of our teenage years where we only communicate at all in a series of grunts.

Secondly most of us cannot multitask. Therefore for us to think about sex and type/text becomes a huge challange which alludes most of us.

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I am afraid many women forget some basic facts about many men.

Firstly we are bred and conditioned to have huge difficulties in communicated and many of us take decades to grow out of our teenage years where we only communicate at all in a series of grunts.

Secondly most of us cannot multitask. Therefore for us to think about sex and type/text becomes a huge challange which alludes most of us.

Yes bigjohn we ladies do understand this and we try to make allowances for your shortfalls.

 

Bend forward please for a little pat on the head.   ^_^ 

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Or can you do better?

 

I received one today which read:

 

you free now

 

no punctuation .... no anything.....

 

what a treat I must have missed there   :( 

I am.

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Now I understand why I get people saying my communications are good.

A little politeness, compliment the profile and express interest - i would love to meet you on etc - best wishes.

On another topic I remember the shortest ever film review I ever read was "Complete Turd".

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This isn't an email message - it was a telegram*.

 

When General Sir Charles Napier annexed the Indian province of Sind to the British Empire in 1853 he is said to have sent the single word "peccavi" (Latin: I have sinned, thus: I have Sind) ny telegram back to London.

 

The story was believed for many years until it emerged that it was a joke perpetrated by a young woman, Catherine Winkworth,. She sent the idea, as a joke to Punch who printed it underneath a cartoon of Napier implying it was fact.

 

Those wacky Victorians! :D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* Except that it wasn't in fact even that!

Edited by zipless

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Yes bigjohn we ladies do understand this and we try to make allowances for your shortfalls.

 

Bend forward please for a little pat on the head.   ^_^ 

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I regularly receive the same type of messages, you can waste time replying (any contact opened this way isn't going to be great), best to simply ignore.

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