Chloe Kisses

Listening To Us

241 posts in this topic

I have just had a client get huffy with me and walk off before he even arrived.

 

Gentleman arrived at direction point late, only 5 minutes. I then gave directions to my car park. He didnt go there, he parked up the road randomly. He called, I directed him to the carpark in front of him and directions to my apartment and the number of the apartment. Its literally a 20 second walk from the car park to my front door. He walked straight past my landmark which is outside my front door and up a side street, stopping at the top to call me. 

 

When I answered i said this "Hi, yes I can see you, would you mind staying where you are till I have finished explaining as its not good having people walking up and down outside the building on the phone looking at the building" . He agreed and I started to explain, he started walking down the street towards my building whilst on the phone so I said "Im sorry would you mind just waiting where you are till we finish talking" he agreed and stopped. He then walked to directly outside my building, staring across the road straight at it whilst still on the phone to me, I said again "Im sorry but you are doing what I asked you not to do" . By now he is 17 minutes late. He then very huffily said "Im going!!".

 

He then called my friend and tried to book in with her telling her that he had been "let down", personally I feel its the other way around. I was the one who was let down, both on the discretionary front and regarding the loss of earnings as I had another guy who called wanting to see me earlier in the day who couldnt make it at another time on this particular day.

 

Was it me? Am I unreasonable in not wanting guys to be standing outside my building regularly scanning it whilst on the phone then walking up to my front door whilst still on the phone.

 

I dont have nosey neighbours, its a nice quiet area, but Im sure it doesnt take too long for people to start noticing guys regularly doing what this gentleman has done. It doesnt really matter at the moment as its cold but once its summer and people have their windows open it could be a different matter.

 

Why do some guys assume their way is the best way. When I mentioned to the guy at one point that he was late rather than say "yes yes im sorry" he just said "yes yes im aware of that!!". Was this just a cocky guy do you think or am I expecting too much in the way of discretion, as lets face it, the guys expect the utmost discretion from us, I feel it should be a mutual thing.

Edited by Chloe Kisses

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Hi Chole

No I don't think you are being unresonable, however maybe you are better off not seeing a pratt like this!!

I prefer to know where I am going rather than bringing attention to myself and making myself obvious

Look upon it as a lucky escape

Peter

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If he couldn't find your door whilst looking at it just think what instructions  he might have needed once he was inside.

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If he couldn't find your door whilst looking at it just think what instructions  he might have needed once he was inside.

 I like this alot

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YANBU.

This one sounds so bad, you probably lucky to have missed him.

 

otoh, he possibly was a bit nervous. 

and males are never good at following directions given by females...

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I have just had a client get huffy with me and walk off before he even arrived.

 

Gentleman arrived at direction point late, only 5 minutes. I then gave directions to my car park. He didnt go there, he parked up the road randomly. He called, I directed him to the carpark in front of him and directions to my apartment and the number of the apartment. Its literally a 20 second walk from the car park to my front door. He walked straight past my landmark which is outside my front door and up a side street, stopping at the top to call me. 

 

When I answered i said this "Hi, yes I can see you, would you mind staying where you are till I have finished explaining as its not good having people walking up and down outside the building on the phone looking at the building" . He agreed and I started to explain, he started walking down the street towards my building whilst on the phone so I said "Im sorry would you mind just waiting where you are till we finish talking" he agreed and stopped. He then walked to directly outside my building, staring across the road straight at it whilst still on the phone to me, I said again "Im sorry but you are doing what I asked you not to do" . By now he is 17 minutes late. He then very huffily said "Im going!!".

 

He then called my friend and tried to book in with her telling her that he had been "let down", personally I feel its the other way around. I was the one who was let down, both on the discretionary front and regarding the loss of earnings as I had another guy who called wanting to see me earlier in the day who couldnt make it at another time on this particular day.

 

Was it me? Am I unreasonable in not wanting guys to be standing outside my building regularly scanning it whilst on the phone then walking up to my front door whilst still on the phone.

 

I dont have nosey neighbours, its a nice quiet area, but Im sure it doesnt take too long for people to start noticing guys regularly doing what this gentleman has done. It doesnt really matter at the moment as its cold but once its summer and people have their windows open it could be a different matter.

 

Why do some guys assume their way is the best way. When I mentioned to the guy at one point that he was late rather than say "yes yes im sorry" he just said "yes yes im aware of that!!". Was this just a cocky guy do you think or am I expecting too much in the way of discretion, as lets face it, the guys expect the utmost discretion from us, I feel it should be a mutual thing.

Understand perfectly  what you are saying here.  I think some guys just do not listen !  Listening to what you said to him, I think he might have got a bit miffed at being told off...  you might not have thought so but he must have been annoyed to have walked off like that. You were not being unreasonable but to be told off even when in the wrong  - it's not a good start to a punt IMHO

There are two entrances to my apartment complex.  One is the right entrance and one is for the other block.  I have lost count of the times the guy has called me and said I am at your door but can't get in. No - because you are at the wrong door which I did tell you as you were walking down the street.  I think I might not have worded it the way you did though Chloe x

Edited by Sarah Summers

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I don't blame you Chloe. I always try to sus out the lie of the land in advance, so I can walk right up and go straight in. That arouses very little suspicion, I hope.

 

You can do a lot of research through Google earth etc, so you can plan your walk up without ever going close.

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YANBU.

This one sounds so bad, you probably lucky to have missed him.

otoh, he possibly was a bit nervous.

and males are never good at following directions given by females...

Pretty much this. The first punt I had was quite late at night. The girl had told me where to park, and text when I arrived. She then text a long list of instructions of how to get to her place, which was in reality about 150 yards away.

I was nervous anyway, it being my first punt, but her instructions said cross over the road, walk past a car park and then my place is no xx, and the address. Unfortunately, having walked past the car park, there were 2 walkways on either side of a row of houses. The right hand one had the road name on, the left hand one didn't - so I had no clue which one to take. The one without the road name had the correct house number, but being late I didn't want to risk ringing the wrong bell! So I walked back to the main road and texted her again to clarify.

I didn't want to hang about round the houses using my phone for the reasons Chloe gave. So what was about a 20 second walk took about 10 minutes! Didn't help the nerves so much either! Lol.

Edited by Burty

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Chloe I've given up asking guys not to do (a),( :cool:,© because it still happens whatever I say or do, and causes both parties frustration and angst. I've built up a lot of regulars over the years so there's not much need to be going through all of this these days, which is a big relief! If someone is indiscrete I just take it in my stride and remember most people don't notice most of the time.

 

Not sure what to suggest because I know people interpret directions their own way, and guys like to park/walk/call from the point they think is best - which is fair enough but at the end of the day it can cause them more hassle.

Edited by Strawberry

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 I think I might not have worded it the way you did though Chloe x

But how would you have worded it? I didnt actually speak to him in a rude way. I was very polite about it, I wanted to scream though lol x

Edited by Chloe Kisses

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I think sometimes nerves come into play mixed with their little brain taking over and makes it impossible to take instructions.  You forget how difficult it Is for men to multi task. 

 

I caught a bloke peeing outside my doorstep once, now that was drawing attention to himself.

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I like to thoroughly confirm the walk up directions before I get out of the car unless the lady has a secondary calling in point once on foot. As Paul said, a confident walk up appearing to know where one is going feels much more comfortable and is certainly more discreet for the lady.

I must admit I had a dreadful time finding a lady's house once as she'd given me a "landmark" in her garden that just wasn't there in my opinion, on top of that the house numbers weren't clear until you were virtually up the path and at the front door. I called her from the other end of the street and she actually said she could see me and directed me back whilst keeping the call going - I felt very conscious of this but she was instigating the indiscretion.

On another occasion I was visiting my favourite lady for the second time, got to her front door and had a total blank - which bloody buzzer is it! :eek: Had to nip round the corner and call her :D That button is etched on my mind now never to be forgotten.

DG

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You told him off 3 times. What, you were you expecting him to pay to shag you? You need to work on your tone.

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I think sometimes nerves come into play mixed with their little brain taking over and makes it impossible to take instructions.  You forget how difficult it Is for men to multi task. 

 

If women are so good at multi-tasking, how come they can't have a headache and have sex??? :D  :D

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You told him off 3 times. What, you were you expecting him to pay to shag you? You need to work on your tone.

Having received clarification from Chloe on this(and re reading her post), he turned what should have been a 20 second walk into a 10+ minute faff around because he wouldn't listen to her clear directions. I can understand the frustation.

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Having received clarification from Chloe on this(and re reading her post), he turned what should have been a 20 second walk into a 10+ minute faff around because he wouldn't listen to her clear directions. I can understand the frustation.

 

 

I understand too, but telling somebody off is seriously going to ruin the dynamic. I would walk off if someone had a go at me on the phone even once, I wouldn't want to meet them , get naked with them and let alone pay them. What kind of business sense is that? Insult the customer? that's a new one....perhaps customer sales advisors at ailing high street stores should tell women that the dresses they have for sale "won't cover up the fat on your thighs"

 

Can some escorts get away with it? Sure, but they look like Kate Upton.

Edited by willsmith

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I ask new clients to park up then call me from inside the car   so I can give them simple directions to my door.  It is so easy and takes just a moment yet I watch from my window on occasions when they park.... get straight out of the car and walk around looking lost while phoning me.

 

Looking lost also means looking conspicuous. 

 

Annoyed though I may be I bite my tongue and remain calm and polite and once they are inside I tick them off with a big smile... it makes all the difference.

Edited by Lynn

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Well, for the sake of the odd kerfuffle, its par for the course.

 

The guy was there, but you let him get away. All he needed was talking in.

 

Besides, being able to operate effectively, may well be because your neighbours do know what you do. Which means they would understand that such occurrences are inevitable.

 

I have to say that much of what occurred, is also very similar in technique to some of the bait and switch, con reports which come in. ie a frustrating run about making the punter more desperate and easier to work over. So the guy erred on caution and baled out on principle.

 

Having an alternative was already pre-thought by your fellow. It was something I used to do when using dating agencies. I often ended up discovering some other new venue, when a date had gone tits up. On some occasions it also involved meeting someone else quite unexpectedly.

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Can't comment objectively as I wasn't there, but I would say that some punters are very nervous by nature and all the more so when they're being told to walk up and down streets and stand here or there prior to an appointment. I can see your side of this, but I can also see his. On the whole, I think oddbloke has a point. He was there...for whatever reason, you were not able to reel him in.

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You told him off 3 times. What, you were you expecting him to pay to shag you? You need to work on your tone.

Oh look its you again  :cool:

 

As I said in my other posts. I didnt tell him off. The first two times I asked him to do something in a perfectly nice tone. The third time I didnt tell him off, I made a statement. At no point did I tell him off. He was rude to me first in his dismissive tone when speaking to me and in his disregard for my very simple wishes. I wasnt asking him to go to ten different points of reference, I simply asked him if he would stay where he was for a minute while we spoke. 

 

You  have absolutley no way to know what my tone was, I have simply typed out text, written word to explain what occurred. We all just guess each others tone when reading what we each have written. 

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I understand too, but telling somebody off is seriously going to ruin the dynamic. I would walk off if someone had a go at me on the phone even once, I wouldn't want to meet them , get naked with them and let alone pay them. What kind of business sense is that? Insult the customer? that's a new one....perhaps customer sales advisors at ailing high street stores should tell women that the dresses they have for sale "won't cover up the fat on your thighs"

 

Can some escorts get away with it? Sure, but they look like Kate Upton.

Oh dear, we really do have a little bee in our ear again dont we. 

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if you go for any appointment you turn up early and if you dont where your going get directions and take care to follow them as the appointment is for your benefit so if you get lost or late then its you who loses out  :(

 

chloe im sure your 'tone' was fine

Edited by Dib Cochran

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Can't comment objectively as I wasn't there, but I would say that some punters are very nervous by nature and all the more so when they're being told to walk up and down streets and stand here or there prior to an appointment. I can see your side of this, but I can also see his. On the whole, I think oddbloke has a point. He was there...for whatever reason, you were not able to reel him in.

Well considering the simple fact that this is the only time its ever happened to me I think the problem was his, not mine. I think he had a bad attitude, I think he was the sort of person who thinks he knows better, that its his way or no way. He came across as somone who usually tells others how to do it. He was dismissive of me in his tone more than once.

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It sounds like the guy was stressed out before he got to the car park, sometimes the more you get flustered the more harder it is to take an easy instruction.

 

When we dont know the place we are heading towards, it can phase us guys, as we dont want to draw attention to ourselves, so we do what we think is right, even if it sounds stupd at the time.

 

I am not saying the guy was not an idiot, all im trying to say is I have found myself in this position, and it can be intimidating, even the smallestr detail like turning 45 degrees can have us heading the wrong way.

 

There is a parlour in Manchester I know, where you are instructed to park and then phone, and the receptionist will guide you to the parlour, I dont drive, so I explained this is not going to assist me, and could I have a post code, needless to say I never visited the parlour.

 

the best way, is to text someone a way to your flat, with very few instructions, that way people can get an idea what tasks lie before them.

 

Its easy tio follow instructions when you know the layout, but if you are stressed and walk into a new place, you can get confussed, as I pressume this guy was, should have given himself more time to calm down before he was given instructions how to park where.

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if you go for any appointment you turn up early and if you dont where your going get directions and take care to follow them as the appointment is for your benefit so if you get lost or late then its you who loses out  :(

 

chloe im sure your 'tone' was fine

Thanks, he arrived late, no call to say he was going to be late and thats before the  phone call. Plenty of times guys have been late, but if I ask them to do something they do it because I ask nicely x

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