juan47

At Discretion

204 posts in this topic

just wanted peoples opinions on this situation i had yesterday.

went to see a girl who had cim (at discretion) on her profile

the meeting is going fine, then she decides to give me oral. she doesnt put on a condom, when i came she didnt move away or take it out of her mouth

she gets up, spits it out and says i dont do that. goes to the bathroom to wash her mouth and then comes back and says i have to leave as i should have known she doesnt do that as it says on her profile. i didnt get my whole hour. i apologized that i upset her but there was no point arguing as the meeting was already ruined.

 

was i wrong to assume she was ok with it?

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Being no expert on these matters, however the fact she hadn't got you to rubber up, would give you every reason to think that she was ok with it.  Name and shame I say!

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Seems strange that she let you do the dirty deed without a problem and only as an afterthought decided to get rid of you...I'm a little baffled to be honest...

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Suspect just a ploy to get rid of you! 

 

I don't do CIM but if I feel a man is getting close when I'm sucking him I gently remind him and ask if he wants to come on my face or tits instead! 

 

Just because she doesn't use a condom for oral doesn't mean she is OK with CIM (as one poster has noted) 

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Very unprofessional imho. I have no problem in principle of a girl listing a service as at discretion, but if you turn up clean and tidy and respectful I think you can reasonably presume that the service will be delivered.  I am sure the SPs on this forum may want to comment on the taste of precum or you coming in their mouth without warning though. But overall I think you have been hard done by.  Who was she? Please do name.

 

Presuming the clients cock is clean enough to go down in the first place, I am curious though to know from the girls here though for what reasons you would allow one client to cim, but decline another?

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Suspect just a ploy to get rid of you! 

 

I don't do CIM but if I feel a man is getting close when I'm sucking him I gently remind him and ask if he wants to come on my face or tits instead! 

 

Just because she doesn't use a condom for oral doesn't mean she is OK with CIM (as one poster has noted) 

And to be absolutely fair to you it is clear on your website that you don't allow cim.

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Sorry to rattle on, but this also one reason why I think there should be some degree of explicit detail in a field report, if only to confirm that advertised services are available.

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I sometimes find that a lot of discretionary practices actually mean it's a chargeable extra.  But that is probably the subject for a different topic.

 

TBH, I would have asked at the start, leaves no room for ambuguity or misunderstnading

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Yes you were slightly wrong to assume. Always ask if its still okay. She shouldnt have cim even at discretion on her profile if she doenst do it so she was in the wrong too, more in the wrong than you though. A guy should still always double check that cim is on the cards even if he is having owo. To be honest we cannot always feel when you are cumming and I ask my guys to let me know when they know they are past the point of no return so that I know he is about to cum, I dont want to take a deep breathe and inhale his spunk thankyou very much. 

 

As I said though, she shouldnt even have it on her profile. The only stipulation I have for CIM is that you can have OWO, if you can have the latter then you automatically can have the former too. If there is a problem then there is no OWO in the first place. Sounds to me like she puts more services on her profile to get more bookings which is a form of scamming and unfair to the ladies who really do offer these services as they lose out on bookings from guys who want them. Its totally unfair all round, to you the client and to other escorts.

 

Check services when you call to make a booking, if she says yes on the phone then does this then you have the full right to a refund on the time you have not had. If she says no then you can always just leave it and call someone else. 

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I sometimes find that a lot of discretionary practices actually mean it's a chargeable extra.  But that is probably the subject for a different topic.

 

TBH, I would have asked at the start, leaves no room for ambuguity or misunderstnading

Personally I feel it should either not be on offer at all or always at discretion. I know a lot of guys dont trust the at discretion and thats because of woman like this one, saying they do it when in reality they dont. If you think hard though, does any decent guy really want his cock sucked by an escort who DOESNT exercise discretion when faced with a dodgy dick. If a girl guarantees owo to you before she has seen what state your cock is in then you have to wonder if she ever does say no no matter what state its in which I would find a bit worrying. 

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Personally I feel it should either not be on offer at all or always at discretion. I know a lot of guys dont trust the at discretion and thats because of woman like this one, saying they do it when in reality they dont. If you think hard though, does any decent guy really want his cock sucked by an escort who DOESNT exercise discretion when faced with a dodgy dick. If a girl guarantees owo to you before she has seen what state your cock is in then you have to wonder if she ever does say no no matter what state its in which I would find a bit worrying. 

Excellent point Chloe.  

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It's definitely your fault for assuming she was OK with it. I always clarify the services before handing over cash.

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I saw a girl the other day who offered owo on her profile but didn't mention cim. I therefore assumed it wasn't on offer and didn't press the subject as I wasn't that bothered. If I had been I would have clarified beforehand.

If it had said she offered both owo AND cim at discretion, then rightly or wrongly I would assume that if she was happy to perform owo on me then she would also allow cim..... Me being me, however, I would have checked anyway beforehand.

In the case you describe, I'd say the girl was at fault as she told you she doesn't do it, but yet it was on her profile.....

If she flat out doesn't do it, why does it state 'at discretion'?

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okay i can understand her being annoyed as you coming in her mouth when it was not expected, but....

it said on her profile that she only does CIM in discretion, yet when you did it, she said she didnt do that service.

 

And then she said you had to leave......well as you said the mood was ruined, but you paid for the hour, so I hope she offered you some of your money back, as she cut the booking time short.

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why does anything have to be 'at discretion' why not just put on the profile what they are willing to do and then punters would know exactly what they can get from a particular wg

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The way I see it is that if 'at discretion' is used honestly then its ok. I can see why a wg would not want to offer owo on an unclean client for example.

The problems start when a wg puts things 'at discretion' when she has no intention of offering that service to anyone, as seems to be the case here.

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Agree with Lydia: smells like a ploy to get you out , for whatever reason.

no bother to continue, so yeah, you have to cut loss and walk away. pity.

 

No real need to name + shame the girl, I'd say, but you have to judge that for yourself.

Kinda depends on how she treated the exit-part of the encounter.

 

Who's fault? presumably Both.

 

Next time: make  sure you gently read her the miranda as in "please let me know if you are uncomfortable with anythying. do you have any preferences yourself? I like a, b, c, I dont do d, e, f. Are you ok with those things? "

Basically, make sure you both know what can and cannot be done. 

It does clarify and ease the rest of the meeting.

 

For ex, I always state that CIM is not my thing and that I will not attempt A, no matter what we play at. And that she can at any time during the meeting say "no" or make it clear there are things she doesnt  like. I will not be offended (or try to).

 

(Yes, EE girls will often abuse that by quickly stating: no kissing, no licking, no touching my breast, no caressing my bum, no..... 

Ooh-Kaaay. I will probably still try to obtain a nice orgasm, but I wont return, and there will be no tip. I may even try to keep her on the bed for the full 60min just to annoy her, but she will reply by needed a wee, and leave early anyway).

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I had always found this strange. If a girl does not want you coming in her mouth then she should tell you to pull out before you shoot before she goes down on you, otherwise how are you to know? Lack of communication.

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If it says at discretion on her profile then its not automatically done,and as such you should have checked before hand if she was ok with it.Also,was she a Brit or a foreign lass,because as we've seen sometimes the profile isnt written by them,or sometimes they dont understand the abbreviations and just tick them.
The threads i've seen now with people saying to clarify services before hand.It doesnt take much to ask.Theres been a few about double checking services before booking and pre punt.If you do that you shouldnt get problems.If it'd said watersports would you just have started spraying away? And i realise thats a bit glib but hopefully people will see the point

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The whole point is.......

 

You paid for the full hour.

 

Was given oral without, and as it stated on her profile cim is with discretion, and at no point did she say you cant come in mouth,

 

And she was annoyed with you for doing cim, so you were asked to leave early.

 

No idea how far you were into the booking, but you had paid for a set time, and she cut that short.....shame on her for doing so.

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I think both parties were at fault but I also think it is easy enough for this to happen - it was a fault of overlooking something, I suspect, not of intentional deceit.

 

The man should always check if he is allowed to cim after all it's a pretty intimate element of a punt and hopefully one would ask before sticking a finger or a cock in a bum.

 

The girl should have been careful to say she wasn't doing cim with the punter (it may have been this punter among others or because she charges extra and it hadn't been asked for and agreed and she just didn't get round to saying this this time.

 

At discretion is a good thing even though it will inevitably produce some problems or disappointments.

 

Anal dependant on size is an obvious reason for discretion, owo dependant on cleanliness or no sores in SP's mouth etc. 

 

i think it is then to be expected there will be disappointments if a discretionary activity turns out to be not available or chargeable but there you go.

 

i would call myself extremely reluctant to risk doing anything I am not sure is acceptable but have then misinterpreted a movement or just for some reason not asked and put a finger in a bum or gone for a kiss on the lips or flicked a tongue out and they've not been welcomed.

 

it's two people being intimate and hiccups will occur.

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Agree with Lydia: smells like a ploy to get you out , for whatever reason.

no bother to continue, so yeah, you have to cut loss and walk away. pity.

 

No real need to name + shame the girl, I'd say, but you have to judge that for yourself.

Kinda depends on how she treated the exit-part of the encounter.

 

Who's fault? presumably Both.

 

Next time: make  sure you gently read her the miranda as in "please let me know if you are uncomfortable with anythying. do you have any preferences yourself? I like a, b, c, I dont do d, e, f. Are you ok with those things? "

Basically, make sure you both know what can and cannot be done. 

It does clarify and ease the rest of the meeting.

 

For ex, I always state that CIM is not my thing and that I will not attempt A, no matter what we play at. And that she can at any time during the meeting say "no" or make it clear there are things she doesnt  like. I will not be offended (or try to).

 

(Yes, EE girls will often abuse that by quickly stating: no kissing, no licking, no touching my breast, no caressing my bum, no..... 

Ooh-Kaaay. I will probably still try to obtain a nice orgasm, but I wont return, and there will be no tip. I may even try to keep her on the bed for the full 60min just to annoy her, but she will reply by needed a wee, and leave early anyway).

A well-considered post - but what has miranda got to do with anything ?

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I have never ever used 'at discretion' - I know some women will work differently so I'm expecting the backlash! 

 

The way I see it I only want to offer services that I want to do and enjoy doing all the time. I'm not adverse to some of the things I say I don't do but only when I am in the mood and with the 'right' man. I made a conscious choice not to offer certain things as extras with a charge because I think it can mess up with the fluidity of the punt. One fee payable and then we can get on with the action.

 

It also means I don't end up in a situation when a man wants something and I have to decide if I want to do it or not. Why would I want to put myself in a position when a man might wish to argue with me that I said I might do it and why won't I do it with him?

 

I can sort of see how anal can be decided on by the size of a man, but as we have heard many times here men are told they are' too big' when they don't have a particularly big cock. It all seems like a ploy to get clients through the door.  I'm not sure how CIM can be at discretion though, how can you tell if a man has icky tasting lumpy cum by looking at him?! 

 

It just seems like a ploy to be able to offer all services without having to actually go through with them, although I am sure some of the ladies here will argue otherwise, which I respect because they are mainly good honest professional escorts and they have their own policies on what and why things are at discretion. However, in this industry their are a lot of people who are not honest or reasonable. 

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If it says at discretion you have to ask first. Even with the ladies that cim with me I always provide a heads-up just before. In my experience if you are careful with the girls it reaps rewards . 

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My understanding is that if and where you see "at discretion" after a service, all you can say is that it MAY be offered. Never expect anything more

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