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IsThereHopeForMe

Hidradenitis Suppurativa Nightmare

7 posts in this topic

Hi, I am posting now out of desperation.

 

I have hidradenitis suppurativa albeit a very mild form, my wife has refused any sexual contact since I first got the condition and it is going on nearly two years now hence why I started looking for WGs

 

As I mentioned it is a VERY mild form and most similar to this (Google "mild hidradenitis suppurativa" and it is most like the first arm pit image, although mine are on my inner thighs)

 

I booked a WG a couple of weeks ago and explained the situation and forwarded the same link and she verbally confirmed this was fine.... And when I got there she changed her mind after being paid and asked me to leave as there was no point continuing the appointment. This crushed me and has taken all my confidence away, I do not know what to do or where to turn now and need some advice on how to proceed.

 

I read a topic on saafe about a guy with testicular cysts and their advice was to get a GPs letter explaining the issue but I do not feel comfortable with this as I then lose my anonymity completely.

 

I am getting to breaking point with this and really need some helpful advice.

 

 

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My understanding is that it is not contagious and if your form is as mild as the photo you've attached it is hardly likely to be even noticed. It is uncommon but harmless.  Please correct me if this is not the case.

 

If it is not contagious and as mild as in the photo, raising it as an issue with the girl before the event is akin to telling a working girl you have skin tags (again not contagious or harmful).  What would be the point?

 

If you feel you need to tell the girl beforehand, you should probably just show her the area and let her know you have a rare form of acne (which it is) called Hidradenitis suppurativa and that this is not in anyway contagious or dangerous to you or her.

 

But, to be honest, I do think that would be making a mountain out of a mole hill.

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I did think of this but got paranoid that I would get there and essentially be turned around as I was before out of pocket and out of luck. 

 

I have emailed a couple of WGs and have not heard back from any of them which again has kind of knocked my confidence but I will try your advice and see what happens.

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I'd be confronting your wife because it's not a reason not to have sex.

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Sorry you are having such a bad time of it, it really is not that bad that you should be turned back from a booking and you have full right to take your money back if that happens again to you.

 

If you are using AW try and search for ladies who have Disable friendly on their likes but it really is nothing to be embarrassed about. 

 

One more thing you do not need a doctors letter any "professional" WG worth her salt would rise above it and treat you to an utterly enjoyable time.  Just keep on looking and do not make it sound as bad as you originally did as by the photo it certainly does not look that bad.  I see a lot of clients with Psoriasis ranging from mild to the extreme and never allow it to phase me or get in the way of an enjoyable appointment.

Edited by DeliciousMsDee

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Strawberry,

My wife and I have discussed it numerous times and we are working on things as best we can but progress is hard and she struggles to get past the appearance especially as she sees the worst of the condition.

 

The image I linked to is the result of the condition but they do flare up from time to time and become very sore and painful and eventually have to be drained or lanced. I am on a very strong course of meds to try to stop the condition that has prevented additional flare-ups but the scarring will be permanent.

 

 

DeliciousMsDee

Thanks, I did agree with the girl (perhaps stupidly) that I would pay regardless of sexual contact but was frankly too shocked at the time to ask for money back when asked to leave.

Do you think there is much point booking a V short appt with the sole intention of finding out if the girl is happy to have further longer sexual bookings? 

 

I have been looking at this from the point of view of the girl and not wanting to have that awkward "what the **** is that moment" I know if the situation was reversed I would have reservations especially as it is not really appropriate to start googling the condition at the start of the booking. 

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If you are going to book someone I would suggest a 30 min booking, that way you will be able to judge whether you connect and feel comfortable and have an enjoyable time with the person.  You really do not need to mention it to anybody unless it is in the groin region or around your mouth.  Stop stressing about it and try and relax not all wg's are bad and will gladly see you and treat you like a lover.

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