separately

Dinner Date Etiquette - Quick Question

64 posts in this topic

Hi folks,

Long time lurker, but signed up for some assistance.

Next punt sees me upgrade myself to a dinner date, followed by an hour in a hotel. I'm keen to get to know her a little better and enjoy a different sort of experience.

What's the etiquette on payment in your experiences?

Typically with a simple incall or outcall at a hotel I pay almost immediately upon meeting the lady. However, with a dinner date I'm unsure - she clearly wants to know she's getting paid, but equally I don't want her to do a runner mid way through dinner.

What's standard? I'm considering 'milestone' payments - ie £X before dinner, and then £X back at the hotel, but that to me seems untrusting and a little bit like a business contract (which on some levels it is).

Any advice appreciated.

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Payment tends to be the same as when you are visiting a lady in her apartment or she visits you in her hotel room. If she is someone who takes the money up front then she will still expect it up front, if she is someone who takes it at the end she will still take it at the end. Miles stone payment, mmm. 

 

You need to find the lady you want to see then ask her how she requires payment, she may take your wishes into mind, or she may wonder why the hell you want to stagger the payments, find it lacking and demand it all up front at the start even if she hadnt planned that in the first place lol xx

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Payment upfront is usually what I would mostly expect, unless I know someone well and we have some trust to work on, then at end is fine,

I do understand why you suggest paying in stages, as I have heard several things about horrid ladies running off with the money half way through dinner saying they need to use the bathroom etc... But i dont think its a good idea and as chloe said, the lady will wonder why you want to do this and feel on edge. So I would say, pick your companion wisely and check her reviews, anyone who values themselves and their reputation would never dream of doing something like that.

Good luck!

Lia x

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Just me, but I couldn't do a dinner date unless I had seen her before and was sure the conversation would flow. By which time I would have built trust and hopefully it would be a mutually enjoyable occasion.

I would pay up front (perhaps discreetly in a nice card with some flowers) that way it's done and you can both then relax.

Good luck!

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Hi folks,

Long time lurker, but signed up for some assistance.

Next punt sees me upgrade myself to a dinner date, followed by an hour in a hotel. I'm keen to get to know her a little better and enjoy a different sort of experience.

What's the etiquette on payment in your experiences?

Typically with a simple incall or outcall at a hotel I pay almost immediately upon meeting the lady. However, with a dinner date I'm unsure - she clearly wants to know she's getting paid, but equally I don't want her to do a runner mid way through dinner.

What's standard? I'm considering 'milestone' payments - ie £X before dinner, and then £X back at the hotel, but that to me seems untrusting and a little bit like a business contract (which on some levels it is).

Any advice appreciated.

Ask her, politely?

She might not want to be walking around with a purse full of cash.

CB

Edited by Corus Boy

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Just me, but I couldn't do a dinner date unless I had seen her before and was sure the conversation would flow. By which time I would have built trust and hopefully it would be a mutually enjoyable occasion.

I would pay up front (perhaps discreetly in a nice card with some flowers) that way it's done and you can both then relax.

Good luck!

Exactly what I was thinking. If going out in a social situation I'd want to already know it was with someone I could be sociable with and trust to not bolt out the door before dessert arrived.

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Is there any particular reason you want to have dinner first and then the sex after? Shagging with a full stomach is unpleasant in the extreme, although not as excruciating as trying to make small talk over the dinner table with a stranger. I wouldn't accept a dinner booking unless the food was last - there are far too many outside factors (bad food, crap service, massive delays) that can fuck it up in a restaurant which will all seem far worse if you haven't broken the ice first, plus it's not as crucial to keep an eye on the time over dinner either.

 

Payment should be upfront, by the way. Don't fish a wedge out of your pocket, peel off the notes to pay the restaurant bill and hand the rest loose across the table though - that happened to me in the Tate once (and whilst I didn't really care, somebody else might :)).

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I couldn't do a dinner date unless I had seen her before and was sure the conversation would flow.

I'm with you all the way there, James. I've met some ladies who were very nice in the bedroom but I would never consider taking them out to dinner. Unfortunately it also works the other way. There are a couple of ladies that I would like to take to dinner but can't. One because of privacy issues on my part and the other because of privacy issues for her.

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If you are doing dinner then you should know the girl well enough to trust her enough to pay upfront.

 

Dinner dates, like overnights, should not be first encounters.

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Many thanks for all of your replies - I'm starting to think I haven't thought this through properly!

I'll have a chat with the lady in question, but I'm leaning towards cash in a card with flowers at the start to get it out of the way.

I appreciate the risk of dinner upfront, however I routinely entertain clients on a 1:1 basis, and don't struggle with small talk, even with the most 'dry' of characters. For me this is part of the experience - a lot of getting to know each other before any intimate contact. Similar to a first date.

I've left more than enough time for dinner and a couple of drinks before retiring to my room - I appreciate that sex on a full stomach won't be great for either party, so that isn't on the agenda!

Thanks again for the helpful responses! I'll pop back and let you know how it goes :)

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On my recent overnight which involved dinner first, the paperwork was sorted when we got back to the hotel. We met up in the hotel bar, then went to the room for her to drop her bag etc off. I asked her then if she wanted to sort it but she just said leave it for later.

It's going to depend on the girl so best to ask her. I agree that I'd only do a dinner date or overnight with a girl I knew I got on ok with, and trust!

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Hi Seperately,

 

 

I agree with other posters here in that the etiquette on payment would be upfront, (unless you know the wg/lady have seen before

and then payment is/can be a little less formal/flexible.) This just reasures her and also covers you in remembering that fee has been paid

so both parties remove potential source of awkwardness and can get on with the date.

 

 

Enjoy & have fun :)

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Yes, I had a dinner date last night with Paris and it was excellent - dinner was good too! ;)

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Is there any particular reason you want to have dinner first and then the sex after?

It's so that if the sex is crap you're not left with an empty feeling in the pit of your stomach. :D

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If you are doing dinner then you should know the girl well enough to trust her enough to pay upfront.

 

Dinner dates, like overnights, should not be first encounters.

Hmmm, depends. I've had some excellent first-time dinner dates and overnights, and some not so great overnights with clients I'd got on with brilliantly on previous occasions.

 

Payment upfront is to avoid those who would try and avoid paying. The agreement of payment for sex contract is deemed immoral and not recognised in criminal law, so there's not much redress apart from a clip around the ear 'ole should the client suddenly discover he's not brought the cash. In a business where customers conceal their name and tend not to give 'fixed' or home contact details there's not much chance of redress. Payment upfront is protection against this however scammers exist on both sides and the ones that leg it with the cash are just as bad, if not worse than those who withhold payment with no intention of paying. The only thing I can advise is to book a lady with good reviews, speak to her in person on the phone and just generally be aware. 

Edited by Strawberry

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doubt a lady with an internet profile or works for an agency would do a runner, bizzare

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Again, thanks for the helpful replies. I've just never done this sort of activity (dinner date) so genuinely want too sure!

I'm sure it will all go smoothly :)

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Interesting thread, especially the answers.   I've done hundreds of dinner dates in this manner and nearly always received payment when in the room, never in the restaurant.

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Pay her the money up front, she may want to put it somewhere safe.

 If she loses the money or has purse/handbag stolen then its her responsibility as its up to her to look after her money.

 

Personally I would be only too glad to hand the money over first in case of losing it myself.

 

SP

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I've done hundreds of dinner dates in this manner and nearly always received payment when in the room, never in the restaurant.

 

Holly, it is usually the case. However I think where OP concerned about, when WG will be paid in the room, then might take this cash with her in restaurant and then run away with it. (as it was described in this thread).

 

Separately: Please don't tell her that you going to give her part of money at the start then another later. Its just will create an awful atmosphere right from the start.  If I personally encountered the situation where client offered some amount paid at the start, and another amount later, I would terminate the meeting and go home. I would rather not get any money at the beginning at all.

 

The best way, as the most guy do: Give her a cash. She can check it or might not. Go out to enjoy yourself. However, I will be concerned if she did took this cash with her from the hotel room. Usually girls just leave it on the table in the hotel, or put it in theirs "whore bags", then take small clutch bag with a lippy and "powdering nose" stuff to go out for a dinner.

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Holly, it is usually the case. However I think where OP concerned about, when WG will be paid in the room, then might take this cash with her in restaurant and then run away with it. (as it was described in this thread).

 

Separately: Please don't tell her that you going to give her part of money at the start then another later. Its just will create an awful atmosphere right from the start.  If I personally encountered the situation where client offered some amount paid at the start, and another amount later, I would terminate the meeting and go home. I would rather not get any money at the beginning at all.

 

The best way, as the most guy do: Give her a cash. She can check it or might not. Go out to enjoy yourself. However, I will be concerned if she did took this cash with her from the hotel room. Usually girls just leave it on the table in the hotel, or put it in theirs "whore bags", then take small clutch bag with a lippy and "powdering nose" stuff to go out for a dinner.

Exactly right !  I am glad some else said this because if I had said it I would have been shot down in flames.

 

When I used to go out on dinner date appointments where we met in the room, went out and then returned for a few hours or overnight - I always accepted the money in the room and left it there until I returned.

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Is there any particular reason you want to have dinner first and then the sex after? Shagging with a full stomach is unpleasant in the extreme, although not as excruciating as trying to make small talk over the dinner table with a stranger. I wouldn't accept a dinner booking unless the food was last - there are far too many outside factors (bad food, crap service, massive delays) that can fuck it up in a restaurant which will all seem far worse if you haven't broken the ice first, plus it's not as crucial to keep an eye on the time over dinner either.

 

 

 

How different we are! There is no way I would be able to have even a quickie before going out for a dinner. I thought that was a whole point of dinner date: to have a chance to socially interact with a person, before the naughty part. A bit like a date. (apart of that the sex guaranteed after). If it was other way round, ie: sex before dinner,  it will felt like a "work" for me.  (Yes it is still a work, no matter how you twist it, but anything which is slightly diminish the feeling of it impacting a lot)

 

I never could understand the notion of "shagging on the full stomach". You having a lttle meal to indulge, (hopefully) not to gorge yourself. In fact you comeback from the restaurant you are feel much more hungry, then when you got there. LOL. (bar over £100 lighter for the client).

 

Amy: in which kind of restaurants you go, to make your "stomach full"? Impossible! lol

Edited by Xenia

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Exactly right !  I am glad some else said this because if I had said it I would have been shot down in flames.

 

When I used to go out on dinner date appointments where we met in the room, went out and then returned for a few hours or overnight - I always accepted the money in the room and left it there until I returned.

 

Sarah! Nobody would shoot you down in flames. LOL. Its nothing exactly controversial I've posted, and us "oldies" operating in the well proven and trustful  (for a both sides) ways.

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How different we are! There is no way I would be able to have even a quickie before going out for a dinner. I thought that was a whole point of dinner date: to have a chance to socially interact with a person, before the naughty part. A bit like a date. (apart of that the sex guaranteed after). If it was other way round, ie: sex before dinner,  it will felt like a "work" for me.  (Yes it is still a work, no matter how you twist it, but anything which is slightly diminish the feeling of it impacting a lot)

 

I never could understand the notion of "shagging on the full stomach". You having a lttle meal to indulge, (hopefully) not to gorge yourself. In fact you comeback from the restaurant you are feel much more hungry, then when you got there. LOL. (bar over £100 lighter for the client).

 

Amy: in which kind of restaurants you go, to make your "stomach full"? Impossible! lol

 

I completely agree with you Xenia. The meal would be sort of foreplay. No point in having the foreplay after the sex !

 

I have had a few dinner dates and drinks and dinner and wine etc have always been on the cards before any fun afterwards.( Once, I decided to leave it at just drinks-- cost me a bomb but...... :(  )

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Exactly right !  I am glad some else said this because if I had said it I would have been shot down in flames.

 

When I used to go out on dinner date appointments where we met in the room, went out and then returned for a few hours or overnight - I always accepted the money in the room and left it there until I returned.

 

 

The money is always paid at the start as far as I am concerned. Why, because it's in my interest that the WG relaxes 100%  and she is not going to if there is any element of doubt over the fee. You pays your money and you take the risk. If the lady walk out on me half way, then I would just accept that its my problem. You have to trust people to a certain extent. The chances of someone reputable doing a runner must be near zero if everything else is ok .

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