Sarah Summers

Don't Be So Cynical That Man!

100 posts in this topic

In the light of recent posts made by guys asking if we think they are naive, I thought a 'heads up' on the professionalism of ladies might be appropriate.

 

We've all heard the tongue in cheek stuff said about ladies who are a bit 'loose'  haven't we?  Things that make you smile...  "she's a friendly girl"... LOL  And what about this one  'The Town Bike - everybody gets a ride'..

 

In the main, I do not believe that working girls are like this - not at all.  Maybe some are, but speaking for myself only and remembering some ladies I have known from the biz - not them either.

 

You may wonder why we do this?  This is where the cynicism creeps in from guys who just can't help the misogyny :)

 

Some of us are only in this for the money.  Oh Quelle surprise!  Some of us like the work, some of us do not consider it to be work, some of us feel it is like a vocation even and love it probably even more than our punters do, and some of us hate it !....  some of us fake orgasms, and some of us cum like trains...  some ladies even squirt :).. but we are all of us - always, always in it for the dosh.

 

So if you are a punter who has seen a really nice lady - no matter what services she provides or what age spectrum she happens to be within...  she is not your girlfriend.

 

I read the comments made by guys saying to some hapless besotted soul - ask her out for a coffee and see what her response is then mate.............

 

Why should she go for a coffee with you?  Give me one good reason why.  

I can give you a few which begin with Discretion for starters, and the fact that she may have seen you and given sterling service, but she might not like you, let alone fancy you - especially if you did something she did not particularly like, such as - shove your cock down her throat and make her choke just because it got your rocks off..........

 

We are businesswomen.  We are not a dating service.  We are not looking for a boyfriend.

 

You should not be looking for anything more than you paid for Sir, and if you really liked her and what she did, then go and see her again - professionally.  Please don't call her for chats, and ask to meet up outside of the paid for arena, because that is when you will find that cynicism creeping in and it usually starts at the bottom of your leg and finds its way upwards. When it gets you your brain, you are doomed.

 

 

Please do not misunderstand.  I have clients who I like and enjoy very much, and I exchange emails, but not texts, and not chats on the 'phone, and never go out for coffee, unless it is on my terms.

 

When I read posts by guys who say they really like this girl and then they find out she has a boyfriend and that she has lied to them..  what planet are they on?  

I can imagine the pressure the poor girl is under, having to pretend she is single because this guy is getting too personal.  

One of my ex-clients told me he would not see me if he knew I had a partner, and he was married !

We do not have to tell you anything about ourselves if we do not want to, and if you find out that your lady has lied to you, then maybe you should be asking yourself why, and not questioning her for being a liar and a hard faced bitch when in fact she is the opposite of that - just a girl doing her job.

 

Would anyone else like to add to this because I feel it is a massive subject which I have only brushed over.

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In the light of recent posts made by guys asking if we think they are naive, I thought a 'heads up' on the professionalism of ladies might be appropriate.

 

We've all heard the tongue in cheek stuff said about ladies who are a bit 'loose'  haven't we?  Things that make you smile...  "she's a friendly girl"... LOL  And what about this one  'The Town Bike - everybody gets a ride'..

 

In the main, I do not believe that working girls are like this - not at all.  Maybe some are, but speaking for myself only and remembering some ladies I have known from the biz - not them either.

 

You may wonder why we do this?  This is where the cynicism creeps in from guys who just can't help the misogyny :)

 

Some of us are only in this for the money.  Oh Quelle surprise!  Some of us like the work, some of us do not consider it to be work, some of us feel it is like a vocation even and love it probably even more than our punters do, and some of us hate it !....  some of us fake orgasms, and some of us cum like trains...  some ladies even squirt :).. but we are all of us - always, always in it for the dosh.

 

So if you are a punter who has seen a really nice lady - no matter what services she provides or what age spectrum she happens to be within...  she is not your girlfriend.

 

I read the comments made by guys saying to some hapless besotted soul - ask her out for a coffee and see what her response is then mate.............

 

Why should she go for a coffee with you?  Give me one good reason why.  

I can give you a few which begin with Discretion for starters, and the fact that she may have seen you and given sterling service, but she might not like you, let alone fancy you - especially if you did something she did not particularly like, such as - shove your cock down her throat and make her choke just because it got your rocks off..........

 

We are businesswomen.  We are not a dating service.  We are not looking for a boyfriend.

 

You should not be looking for anything more than you paid for Sir, and if you really liked her and what she did, then go and see her again - professionally.  Please don't call her for chats, and ask to meet up outside of the paid for arena, because that is when you will find that cynicism creeping in and it usually starts at the bottom of your leg and finds its way upwards. When it gets you your brain, you are doomed.

 

 

Please do not misunderstand.  I have clients who I like and enjoy very much, and I exchange emails, but not texts, and not chats on the 'phone, and never go out for coffee, unless it is on my terms.

 

When I read posts by guys who say they really like this girl and then they find out she has a boyfriend and that she has lied to them..  what planet are they on?  

I can imagine the pressure the poor girl is under, having to pretend she is single because this guy is getting too personal.  

One of my ex-clients told me he would not see me if he knew I had a partner, and he was married !

We do not have to tell you anything about ourselves if we do not want to, and if you find out that your lady has lied to you, then maybe you should be asking yourself why, and not questioning her for being a liar and a hard faced bitch when in fact she is the opposite of that - just a girl doing her job.

 

Would anyone else like to add to this because I feel it is a massive subject which I have only brushed over.

Brilliant post. You'll know as much as anyone else the amount of 'confusion' which seems to reign for some guys - if we are nice and friendly, provide a good service, are genuinely interested in the client some draw the conclusion that we want a relationship them, or that a relationship would work.

 

When chatting with guys about my interests and things I do outside of bookings, one or two have said "but none of this is on your website?". Of course it isn't, does any other business-person post details of their personal life on their adverts?No they do not. 

 

If someone asks me about my marital status I either throw it back, or tell them that it doesn't matter whether I'm an a relationship or not-my bookings are never affected by a partner real or imagined. One or two clients have actually had the cheek to actually criticise something I had done in my private life, thought they could tell me what I should or shouldn't do. I'd not dream of telling them what to do with themselves. I'll give advise if asked, but it's not for me to tell anyone how to live their lives.

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The other phenomenon of course is the guy who announces that should be win the lottery he'd take you away from all of this, or who starts offering free holidays. Errr, I'm quite happy thank you and if I were to go on holiday it would be alone or with someone I'm involved with. It's nice to be offered these things but the perplexed "I'm offering you a holiday, surely that must be temptation enough" looks are still there. Would these guys offer the same to other persons they buy services from?or go away with people they come into contact with at work?Perhaps they would!

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Great post.

 

When I've posted similar conclusions (admonishing other punters, a large percentage of whom seem to be fantasists on this board, which makes the endless repetition of surreal threads more than a little dull) I tend to get flayed because punters don't like having their balloons deflated.

 

Interesting that when a girl says the same thing, the silence is deafening.

 

Keep it up and I might end up besotted with you, Sarah. Seriously, though, fantastic post.

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Nothing at all to argue with in the OP- looks spot on.

 

The problem is, in part, a biological one. Most blokes are fully able to appreciate (if you tell them loudly and frequently enough) what a  WG's professionalism is, and what it means. This is an intellectual understanding- it's processed by that bit of the brain which deals with concepts and reason, and can look beyond appearances.

 

 However, the signals which are received whan a WG is  doing her best work -  making you feel like you are on cloud nine - are processed intially by a different  part of the brain.  Many of the impressions and feelings never even get passed over to the conscious control centre for evaluation before they are logged and used as a basis for some emotional, and occasionally a physical, response. These reactions are hard-wired into the brain, so it's not surprising that it's a common problem, especially for new players.

 

Being able to discount the  'mutual attraction' signals  takes practice and life experience. It's a lesson which everyone has to learn for themselves, so while it can seem a bit tiresome that the subject keeps cropping up, it's an inevitable part of the scene. Best we can do is help people through it gently but firmly. Sarah's post could act as a user guide to all first-timers!

 

You can over-do the discounting  course, and go too far the other way : you end up a cynical old fart, and miss out on the enjoyment there is to be had within the mutually agreed, but implicit, terms of 'so far, but no further'.

 

You know you are in the right place when you can see a WG as an actress, and regard that as a good thing rather than an implicit criticism. After all, the theatre is built on the (willing) suspension of disbelief, yet we keep going...

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Great post.

When I've posted similar conclusions (admonishing other punters, a large percentage of whom seem to be fantasists on this board, which makes the endless repetition of surreal threads more than a little dull) I tend to get flayed because punters don't like having their balloons deflated.

Interesting that when a girl says the same thing, the silence is deafening.

Keep it up and I might end up besotted with you, Sarah. Seriously, though, fantastic post.

I quite agree with you Lohengrin.

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In the light of recent posts made by guys asking if we think they are naive, I thought a 'heads up' on the professionalism of ladies might be appropriate.

 

We've all heard the tongue in cheek stuff said about ladies who are a bit 'loose'  haven't we?  Things that make you smile...  "she's a friendly girl"... LOL  And what about this one  'The Town Bike - everybody gets a ride'..

 

In the main, I do not believe that working girls are like this - not at all.  Maybe some are, but speaking for myself only and remembering some ladies I have known from the biz - not them either.

 

You may wonder why we do this?  This is where the cynicism creeps in from guys who just can't help the misogyny :)

 

Some of us are only in this for the money.  Oh Quelle surprise!  Some of us like the work, some of us do not consider it to be work, some of us feel it is like a vocation even and love it probably even more than our punters do, and some of us hate it !....  some of us fake orgasms, and some of us cum like trains...  some ladies even squirt :).. but we are all of us - always, always in it for the dosh.

 

So if you are a punter who has seen a really nice lady - no matter what services she provides or what age spectrum she happens to be within...  she is not your girlfriend.

 

I read the comments made by guys saying to some hapless besotted soul - ask her out for a coffee and see what her response is then mate.............

 

Why should she go for a coffee with you?  Give me one good reason why.  

I can give you a few which begin with Discretion for starters, and the fact that she may have seen you and given sterling service, but she might not like you, let alone fancy you - especially if you did something she did not particularly like, such as - shove your cock down her throat and make her choke just because it got your rocks off..........

 

We are businesswomen.  We are not a dating service.  We are not looking for a boyfriend.

 

You should not be looking for anything more than you paid for Sir, and if you really liked her and what she did, then go and see her again - professionally.  Please don't call her for chats, and ask to meet up outside of the paid for arena, because that is when you will find that cynicism creeping in and it usually starts at the bottom of your leg and finds its way upwards. When it gets you your brain, you are doomed.

 

 

Please do not misunderstand.  I have clients who I like and enjoy very much, and I exchange emails, but not texts, and not chats on the 'phone, and never go out for coffee, unless it is on my terms.

 

When I read posts by guys who say they really like this girl and then they find out she has a boyfriend and that she has lied to them..  what planet are they on?  

I can imagine the pressure the poor girl is under, having to pretend she is single because this guy is getting too personal.  

One of my ex-clients told me he would not see me if he knew I had a partner, and he was married !

We do not have to tell you anything about ourselves if we do not want to, and if you find out that your lady has lied to you, then maybe you should be asking yourself why, and not questioning her for being a liar and a hard faced bitch when in fact she is the opposite of that - just a girl doing her job.

 

Would anyone else like to add to this because I feel it is a massive subject which I have only brushed over.

 

Well said, a good post. At last a touch of reality.

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As has been said the OP by Sarah is brilliant and the followups by Strawberry. Hopefully the responses from other guys will be as good as those from Lohengrin and BlueRememberedHills.

Out of the 20+ ladies that I have seen there are a handful that I'm "friendly" with and with whom I exchange e-mails on an occasional basis. One of them on a more regular basis. But with none of them am I more than "friendly" and they don't form part of my private life and I don't form part of there private life.

If they asked me to go for a coffee then I would accept (with one exception because it's too close to home). But I would never dream of asking them to go for a coffee. Know the boundaries. Observe the boundaries.

If I am able to offer advice or help to any of them without it impinging on or endangering my private life then I am very happy to do so and have done so. One of the ladies has been very helpful to me and I like to think vice-versa. But I don't want to be part of her personal life.

I will tell a lady what I want her to know. I won't lie. If it was going to be a lie then I don't give any information at all. I expect the lady to do exactly the same. The lady is a sex worker not a social worker. She is operating a business and her private life is her own.

Having said which I can understand some men becoming besotted with a lady because there are some very personable and attractive ladies out there. Don't do it.

Edited by gibbs

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Agree with all of the above. There are a fai number of posters who are self deluded and or naive.

That's not a criticism cos I genuinely feel for them if they have fallen for a WG

What we are dealing with here is ego. We all have one and if someone pushes the right buttons they can make you dance like a puppet.

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Sarah, IMO  I do not tend like some of your opinions - but on this ocassion I think you have got it spot on with an excellent post/thread.

It is exactly how I imagine alot of wgs feel.

 

 

 

There is such a wide varied type of "punter" out there that it can not be typically typecast what the average client is like, but there are some clients

that as Lohengrin points out are disillushioned on what an escort/prostitute is.

 

I imagine that some just can not get the thought out of their mind that girls are sitting around in stockings and fuck me high heels 24/7 just waiting around, even on their days off or do not have a life outside of work, because they love sex so much they will practically go with anything that moves, which includes seeing them personally outside of hours if persuaded and thinking along the lines of dating agency.

 

Fantasy and Reality are two seperate things entirely.  The mundane business or the other side to a wgs life deflates not only the ego of some clients but the erection shrinks.

 

An escort will simple remove all layers of her job when she is out of work mode. The "job" is not her personally.  Where some confusion lies is that

if an escort gives a couple of details away about herself personally to a client- this will be misinterpreted by some  as to think they know her (the escort)

in a personal way, and again the disillusion is there thinking that there is a connection of some sort between the escort and the real person behind (facade) and

them the client. Especially if they particular like a GFE experience, which is an intimate experience, it causes more confusion. 

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 if someone pushes the right buttons they can make you dance like a puppet.

I guess it's not what you meant, but this can read as though the manipulation is deliberate and in some way malicious. The point of Sarah's original post was that a girl - just by doing her job - is going to send out signals which can be misinterpreted by those who don't understand, or try to ignore, the ground rules. The irony is that the better she is - and the less cynical - the stronger the signals. That's professional, not manipulative: for those who misread it, it's unfortunate ( but you will get over it); for the rest of us, it makes an encounter sing and lifts it above the purely mechanical.

 

We've dealt here largely with the naive end of the inappropriate behaviour spectrum. But I wonder if there are men who let themselves fall for a WG precisely because it is a doomed venture? Cynicism squared!

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You may wonder why we do this?  This is where the cynicism creeps in from guys who just can't help the misogyny :)

 

Some of us are only in this for the money.  Oh Quelle surprise!  Some of us like the work, some of us do not consider it to be work, some of us feel it is like a vocation even and love it probably even more than our punters do, and some of us hate it !....  some of us fake orgasms, and some of us cum like trains...  some ladies even squirt :).. but we are all of us - always, always in it for the dosh.

 

So if you are a punter who has seen a really nice lady - no matter what services she provides or what age spectrum she happens to be within...  she is not your girlfriend.

 

 

 

Absolutely agreed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We are businesswomen.  We are not a dating service.  We are not looking for a boyfriend.

 

 

 

Ok but why do you (NOT specifically you) say if you are looking for a real girl friend experience , a great company don't look any where come and see me enjoy the most memorable day of your life.....

 

 

 

You should not be looking for anything more than you paid for Sir, and if you really liked her and what she did, then go and see her again - professionally.  

 

 

Good idea but you're  (NOT specifically you) cheating with guys by providing a set-up GFE but behind the scene making some guys feeling for you like those who posted to other threads. 

 

 

I have no question to you if you simply say it's all about a "F**K & GO" I'll pay for it & I'll get it. :)

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I would say people are properly in Love when they care more something outside of themselves more than they do of themself. So the odds are against it being real, if you're paying someone money and expecting something back. Though who knows? It might develop! (So gentlemen, ask her out for a coffee, she can only say no, which is the same as not asking. ;-).) Personally I think Love is better reserved for a deity of ones choice (real or imagined), mortals just have too much built in obsolescence.

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Ok but why do you (NOT specifically you) say if you are looking for a real girl friend experience , a great company don't look any where come and see me enjoy the most memorable day of your life.....

 

 

 

I should have thought that's pretty obvious. Because that's the service that's being sold. You know: fantasy girlfriend. I mean, the goal of video games (for instance) is to simulate whatever the subject of the game is (war or football or whatever) as closely as possible. Ditto an escort service. But playing "Gears of War" doesn't imply you want live ammunition raining down on you any more than seeing an escort implies you're in the market for a real-life girlfriend/boyfriend. In both cases, the pitch is that it's the most believable version of the fantasy available and that is good. It shouldn't, however, mean we can't tell reality from make believe. Do you really need to ask the question above?

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Great posts Sarah and Strawberry.

It's well worth the reminder that us ladies provide a service for the time booked and nothing more should be expected. I recently had a first time enquiry from a gent, who ultimately was unable to visit, who then asked if he could be my "long term friend and to send  me Birthday and christmas cards every year". At the risk of sounding mercenary I had to gently remind him that the escort business does not run that way; we are not "friends" (unless a friendship naturally develops over time) or pen pals. To those we meet, no matter how friendly we are, this does not translate as anything more than what it is; that we gave you what you booked to the best of our ability. That is not to say we fake enjoying your company (people often get on), just that once you leave, no matter how cool we think you are, that the transaction (for want of a better word) is over unless you chose to book us again. I, for one, do not need or want rescuing/taking away from all this as I like my life as it is thank you. I liken the escort service to the counsellor service; we may genuinely care about you while you are with us, but we have to let go when you leave, and everyone must respect the boundaries.

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Ok but why do you (NOT specifically you) say if you are looking for a real girl friend experience , a great company don't look any where come and see me enjoy the most memorable day of your life.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Its called marketing Jemca.

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Super post Sarah and I hope it strikes home for some people.  Jemca13 the ladies are not actually offering a GFE, they are offering the illusion of a GFE, its all fantasy and that's what some men don't seem to be able to grasp.

 

The one thing that really used to wind me up, and sadly it nearly always came from well meaning nice gentlemen was having someone say 'what's a lovely girl or articulate woman like you doing in a job like this'?  They meant well by it I'm sure, but didn't realise the inference they were making when saying it.  None of them could understand why I enjoyed my job and could even say I took a pride in doing it well, which I did.

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Jemca13 the ladies are not actually offering a GFE, they are offering the illusion of a GFE, its all fantasy and that's what some men don't seem to be able to grasp.

 

Well more pertinently they are actually offering a GFE - a Girl Friend Experience, just like the Earthquake ride at Universal Studios offers an earthquake experience. It's not a real earthquake and a WG is not offering to really be your girlfriend.

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Great posts....

I can see why it can be difficult for those of us who like the 'GFE', but the way I see it is that is what I am paying for and nothing more. There are a couple of girls I've seen that I like as they are really nice girls, but I don't like them in any kind of romantic way. All I would hope they (or any wg) would think of me is that they know I'm someone who is decent, will turn up to a booking as arranged, be clean, polite, with the required amount of money and not push any boundaries or give them any hassle.

I do text one of the girls occasionally, and she sometimes texts me, but there is never any personal stuff involved more like the odd 'how's it going' and to make a booking - and even then that was only after she mentioned it was something she didn't mind. I know she only does it because she is looking after her business interests and I'm quite happy with that.

I'd never expect to meet up with any wg in unpaid time, nor would I in the highly unlikely event I'd ever be asked to! ;)

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I think I'm going to throw a spanner in the works here.  Not that I disagree much with any of the posts so far, but there are all sorts of guys out there and they don't all neatly fit into the 'into the fuck 'em and go' mentality, or the 'totally deluded and naive' camp.

 

I've only been punting a short time (first ever punt 12th September last year) but I've already gone through a few different phases of what I am looking for from my punting.  My first aim was just to shag as many women in as many different ways as I could get around to. 

 

But then it changed as I discovered just how lovely some of these girls are and how much I liked them as individuals.  Some of you probably recollect early posts of mine talking about how I'd fallen hook, line and sinker for a few different girls I'd met.  However, at the same time as feeling blown away by how lovely these girls I'd met were, whenever the fairy tale ended I accepted it and moved on without too much of a backward look.

 

Recently, I have been back to the numbers game and gone through a range of enjoyable but emotionally dead punts principally to feel I had done my bit for experiencing the delights of many diverse girls.

 

However, things are once again taking a turn for me.  I find that I miss the connection and emotions of getting to know individual girls well and fostering a 'relationship'.  I have one regular at the moment, and she is lovely, but I am now firmly of the opinion that I would like a few regulars and just the occasional new girl, rather than six new girls to every trip to my regular as is the case at the moment.

 

What I am trying to say is that I love punting that has an extra edge to it.  The 'fantasy' that this is beyond just sex for cash.  I don't actually care too much that it isn't anything more, as long as it feels like it's more.  I love to flirt with it being more, and I love it to get those flirty bits coming back at me too.  It's just so much more exciting.

 

I have rules. 

 

- Rule one: never, ever actually believe anything is real

- Rule two: if the girl wishes to discontinue matters for whatever reason, it's over, full stop

- Rule three: never ask any girl for any service I am not willing to pay for (but be prepared to accept any offers made by any girl ;) ).

 

A few weeks ago my regular declined a meeting with me, as she had her period.  When I saw her the following week I told her I had been missing her and that I would have been happy to meet her just for coffee.  She admonished me for not telling her this at the time. :unsure:   Under my rules, I didn't see it as my place to ask her to meet for coffee, but at the same time I am very happy to hear from her that she would have liked to have met.

 

Sorry for blurbing away, but the whole point of my post is that I think that I am probably not the only guy who likes things to be beyond just sex for cash, but who is also capable of handling the situation so that there is still a separation between a service that is paid for and any 'real' relationship.

 

Anyone get this?

 

Ok, I am now picturing nearly half of the readers of my post who think I'm nuts, nearly half who have got bored of my rambling and moved on to the next post, but mayby just the odd somebody who may get where I'm coming from.

 

:lol:

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I think I'm going to throw a spanner in the works here. Not that I disagree much with any of the posts so far, but there are all sorts of guys out there and they don't all neatly fit into the 'into the fuck 'em and go' mentality, or the 'totally deluded and naive' camp.

I've only been punting a short time (first ever punt 12th September last year) but I've already gone through a few different phases of what I am looking for from my punting. My first aim was just to shag as many women in as many different ways as I could get around to.

But then it changed as I discovered just how lovely some of these girls are and how much I liked them as individuals. Some of you probably recollect early posts of mine talking about how I'd fallen hook, line and sinker for a few different girls I'd met. However, at the same time as feeling blown away by how lovely these girls I'd met were, whenever the fairy tale ended I accepted it and moved on without too much of a backward look.

Recently, I have been back to the numbers game and gone through a range of enjoyable but emotionally dead punts principally to feel I had done my bit for experiencing the delights of many diverse girls.

However, things are once again taking a turn for me. I find that I miss the connection and emotions of getting to know individual girls well and fostering a 'relationship'. I have one regular at the moment, and she is lovely, but I am now firmly of the opinion that I would like a few regulars and just the occasional new girl, rather than six new girls to every trip to my regular as is the case at the moment.

What I am trying to say is that I love punting that has an extra edge to it. The 'fantasy' that this is beyond just sex for cash. I don't actually care too much that it isn't anything more, as long as it feels like it's more. I love to flirt with it being more, and I love it to get those flirty bits coming back at me too. It's just so much more exciting.

I have rules.

- Rule one: never, ever actually believe anything is real

- Rule two: if the girl wishes to discontinue matters for whatever reason, it's over, full stop

- Rule three: never ask any girl for any service I am not willing to pay for (but be prepared to accept any offers made by any girl ;) ).

A few weeks ago my regular declined a meeting with me, as she had her period. When I saw her the following week I told her I had been missing her and that I would have been happy to meet her just for coffee. She admonished me for not telling her this at the time. :unsure: Under my rules, I didn't see it as my place to ask her to meet for coffee, but at the same time I am very happy to hear from her that she would have liked to have met.

Sorry for blurbing away, but the whole point of my post is that I think that I am probably not the only guy who likes things to be beyond just sex for cash, but who is also capable of handling the situation so that there is still a separation between a service that is paid for and any 'real' relationship.

Anyone get this?

Ok, I am now picturing nearly half of the readers of my post who think I'm nuts, nearly half who have got bored of my rambling and moved on to the next post, but mayby just the odd somebody who may get where I'm coming from.

:lol:

I know what you mean, and am sort of similar in that I'm not in the "fuck 'em and go" camp either, and I'm certainly not deluded or naïve! I sort of wish I could "fuck em and go" then I could go to parlours and save a bit of cash or get more punts for my money! :). I prefer a longer meeting with a bit of banter/conversation thrown in. I also like punts with social time followed by private time, where the social time might involve a meal or whatever. With a wg who is happy to indulge that kind of booking of course, which I always try to emphasise when contact is made. I also prefer to have just a couple of regular girls at any one time rather than a different girl every punt, as I think the 'social' side of things becomes easier as you get to know one another.

I've seen it posted that guys who do that kind of thing would be better joining a dating site or getting a girlfriend. I don't want either of those things, but I like the interaction with the girl knowing what will be following later - it just makes the whole thing more enjoyable for me, and that's what it's all about right? It's still all within the SP / client business deal to me, and when the booking ends, that's it until the next time.

As you say Thurson, I think there is a bit more to it than the two categories you mention at the beginning of your post.

Edited by Burty

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In the light of recent posts made by guys asking if we think they are naive, I thought a 'heads up' on the professionalism of ladies might be appropriate.

 

We've all heard the tongue in cheek stuff said about ladies who are a bit 'loose'  haven't we?  Things that make you smile...  "she's a friendly girl"... LOL  And what about this one  'The Town Bike - everybody gets a ride'..

 

In the main, I do not believe that working girls are like this - not at all.  Maybe some are, but speaking for myself only and remembering some ladies I have known from the biz - not them either.

 

You may wonder why we do this?  This is where the cynicism creeps in from guys who just can't help the misogyny :)

 

Some of us are only in this for the money.  Oh Quelle surprise!  Some of us like the work, some of us do not consider it to be work, some of us feel it is like a vocation even and love it probably even more than our punters do, and some of us hate it !....  some of us fake orgasms, and some of us cum like trains...  some ladies even squirt :).. but we are all of us - always, always in it for the dosh.

 

So if you are a punter who has seen a really nice lady - no matter what services she provides or what age spectrum she happens to be within...  she is not your girlfriend.

 

I read the comments made by guys saying to some hapless besotted soul - ask her out for a coffee and see what her response is then mate.............

 

Why should she go for a coffee with you?  Give me one good reason why.  

I can give you a few which begin with Discretion for starters, and the fact that she may have seen you and given sterling service, but she might not like you, let alone fancy you - especially if you did something she did not particularly like, such as - shove your cock down her throat and make her choke just because it got your rocks off..........

 

We are businesswomen.  We are not a dating service.  We are not looking for a boyfriend.

 

You should not be looking for anything more than you paid for Sir, and if you really liked her and what she did, then go and see her again - professionally.  Please don't call her for chats, and ask to meet up outside of the paid for arena, because that is when you will find that cynicism creeping in and it usually starts at the bottom of your leg and finds its way upwards. When it gets you your brain, you are doomed.

 

 

Please do not misunderstand.  I have clients who I like and enjoy very much, and I exchange emails, but not texts, and not chats on the 'phone, and never go out for coffee, unless it is on my terms.

 

When I read posts by guys who say they really like this girl and then they find out she has a boyfriend and that she has lied to them..  what planet are they on?  

I can imagine the pressure the poor girl is under, having to pretend she is single because this guy is getting too personal.  

One of my ex-clients told me he would not see me if he knew I had a partner, and he was married !

We do not have to tell you anything about ourselves if we do not want to, and if you find out that your lady has lied to you, then maybe you should be asking yourself why, and not questioning her for being a liar and a hard faced bitch when in fact she is the opposite of that - just a girl doing her job.

 

Would anyone else like to add to this because I feel it is a massive subject which I have only brushed over.

 

Sarah my friend I couldn't agree with you more. You know I am a woman of only a few words on here but girl you are spot on.

Shelly x

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I think I'm going to throw a spanner in the works here.  Not that I disagree much with any of the posts so far, but there are all sorts of guys out there and they don't all neatly fit into the 'into the fuck 'em and go' mentality, or the 'totally deluded and naive' camp.

 

I've only been punting a short time (first ever punt 12th September last year) but I've already gone through a few different phases of what I am looking for from my punting.  My first aim was just to shag as many women in as many different ways as I could get around to. 

 

But then it changed as I discovered just how lovely some of these girls are and how much I liked them as individuals.  Some of you probably recollect early posts of mine talking about how I'd fallen hook, line and sinker for a few different girls I'd met.  However, at the same time as feeling blown away by how lovely these girls I'd met were, whenever the fairy tale ended I accepted it and moved on without too much of a backward look.

 

Recently, I have been back to the numbers game and gone through a range of enjoyable but emotionally dead punts principally to feel I had done my bit for experiencing the delights of many diverse girls.

 

However, things are once again taking a turn for me.  I find that I miss the connection and emotions of getting to know individual girls well and fostering a 'relationship'.  I have one regular at the moment, and she is lovely, but I am now firmly of the opinion that I would like a few regulars and just the occasional new girl, rather than six new girls to every trip to my regular as is the case at the moment.

 

What I am trying to say is that I love punting that has an extra edge to it.  The 'fantasy' that this is beyond just sex for cash.  I don't actually care too much that it isn't anything more, as long as it feels like it's more.  I love to flirt with it being more, and I love it to get those flirty bits coming back at me too.  It's just so much more exciting.

 

I have rules. 

 

- Rule one: never, ever actually believe anything is real

- Rule two: if the girl wishes to discontinue matters for whatever reason, it's over, full stop

- Rule three: never ask any girl for any service I am not willing to pay for (but be prepared to accept any offers made by any girl ;) ).

 

A few weeks ago my regular declined a meeting with me, as she had her period.  When I saw her the following week I told her I had been missing her and that I would have been happy to meet her just for coffee.  She admonished me for not telling her this at the time. :unsure:   Under my rules, I didn't see it as my place to ask her to meet for coffee, but at the same time I am very happy to hear from her that she would have liked to have met.

 

Sorry for blurbing away, but the whole point of my post is that I think that I am probably not the only guy who likes things to be beyond just sex for cash, but who is also capable of handling the situation so that there is still a separation between a service that is paid for and any 'real' relationship.

 

Anyone get this?

 

Ok, I am now picturing nearly half of the readers of my post who think I'm nuts, nearly half who have got bored of my rambling and moved on to the next post, but mayby just the odd somebody who may get where I'm coming from.

 

:lol:

 

Well said Thurson.

 

I'm exactly in the same space you are now. Somewhere between the 'F*ck & Go' type and the Stalker type, are the type who are rational, sensible & fully understand the game being played here, but yet have a wonderful internal battle between the heart and the head. I would never try to change the relationship from being anything other than a business transaction. But man, I have felt some genuine emotion, and even some pain with 1 or 2 regulars. But i don't do anything about it. It's just the price I gave to pay from opening myself up to this kind of interaction.

 

I do hope that some of the girls realise that this 3rd type exists and that we aren't all of the extremes. I choose to play this game. I have so much respect for the tough career these ladies have chosen. I always support them and respect their boundaries. And I often fall in love a little bit :wub:

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I think I'm going to throw a spanner in the works here. 

 

I don't think so at all: there's nothing in what you say which is inconsistent with what others ( ladies and gents) have said. I certainly get it.

 

 Fact is that there is a very wide range of behaviours which are in the acceptable band, and many of us find that something richer than the 'wham bam thank you ma'am ' approach can be both satisfiying and realistic.

 Setting the boundaries isn't that hard. As a wise wonk once said- "I may not be able to define twilight with any precision, but I can sure tell day from night".

 

I think we are all violently agreeing....

 

If Sarah's OP is becoming definitive as a statement of reality, it would be interesting to hear what handling strategies have been developed to cope with chaps who need to smell the coffee. Lara mentioned one above which seems well balanced and designed to be firm but gentle; but what do other WGs do to nudge clients towards the sort of sweet spot Thurson has landed in?

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Being able to discount the  'mutual attraction' signals  takes practice and life experience. It's a lesson which everyone has to learn for themselves, so while it can seem a bit tiresome that the subject keeps cropping up, it's an inevitable part of the scene. 

 This is sooooooo true!

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