john0711

I Upset Someone On Aw

163 posts in this topic

Hello Folks,

 

Long time lurker, I did post under another username but that email account is no longer active so, sorry for having to change.

 

It seems that I have upset one of the ladies from AW and know she is going to advise other girls to stay clear of me....why is she taking such an action?

 

Well basically before I meet with anyone from any site I always do a search for the mobile phone number using google. The reason for this it quickly shows up some of the scammers who have multiple IDs or are shifting folk around (take some of the asians for starters)...also if anyone has written any FRs on other sites it usually brings them up as well.

 

The issue is that I did a search on a number and I found an advert in gumtree by the lady in question selling some a some household goods (no not the naughty kind). I thought oh thats not so good that info being linked to the ladys phone number as some folk might use it for the WRONG reasons.

 

I decided to info the lady of this and she came back, very nicely written may I add, and said my email was distrubing that I had carried out such a search and that she would not want to meet someone that did such a thing.

 

So now she is going to post on the AW escort forum about me being creepy. So it seems that these days your not allowed to do a search on the person that you wish to spend time and money with to make sure that the person is not a false AW profile or some sort of mobile number being used all over the place for multiple women.

 

I think the mistake I made was actually advising the woman in question about the results of a harmless search. It seems that you try and do the right thing but its taken totally out of context. I suppose I have learned my lesson, next time I will not bother and maybe the woman in question will have learned a lesson and be careful about what she does.

 

Take care folks

J

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I see where she is coming from - so she uses her phone for escorting and also other purposes - but who are you to carry out risk assessment? It's entirely her business.

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I see where she is coming from - so she uses her phone for escorting and also other purposes - but who are you to carry out risk assessment? It's entirely her business.

 

The fact that she decided to use her private mobile for escrting puproses was her choice, stupid it may be. Most punters are aware

of this and use a separate punting SIM/Phone.

 

She displayed her number in an open forum, for the entire world to see. If john0711, or any other punter, wanted to carry out

a search, it would be of no one's business, as you are trying to minimise being scammed/conned or end up up seeing a

timewasting WG.

 

Nowadays, most people will google any small piece of info they have, if planning to spend money on a site, etc.

 

Perhaps john0711 was being too helpful and ended up with egg on his face. I myself would have done that as well,

to point out or advise the WG to get a separate phone for her escorting purposes.

 

In terms of her not wanting to see me as a result, I would move on. However, she may have been vindictive and left

a negative remark in the "notes" field (which punters can't see) informing other escorts what she thought of him.

Sadly, punters can't do much about this, other than to get their next WG booked/seen to post a positive note against them.

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still unsure as to why her using her phone number to sell stuff on gumtree was concerning to you

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I did the same thing before & still I'm doing it if I doubt any lady then search the phone number if she is using it for escorting or any other purposes and I've found some of them are using for multi purposes. Even when any lady give me her personal number I still carry out the search and I use my personal number to almost all ladies except newbies. I don't see here any reason of upsetting or offence as I won't tell her I searched your number and found it there......well to minimize the risk it's a good idea to search in terms of risk assessment. :P 

Edited by lewishamguy

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still unsure as to why her using her phone number to sell stuff on gumtree was concerning to you

 

Concerned (for her welfare/wellbeing) that further down the line, if someone puts together 2 and 2 and works out that she

is an escort (from the given private mobile number which was inadvertently put in public display), thereby compromising

her relationship with friends/family/employer.

 

Surely he's helping her in NOT getting outed?

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Hmmm...

 

The word Creepy get's bandied about so much these days it's starting to lose all meaning. If you told this to her and she knew you looked like Richard Gere you would be an Officer and a Gentleman, unfortunately she probably thinks of you as a balding Richard Nixon lookalike, so you're a lowly, gutter dwelling creep.

 

Googling a phone number/pictures/information is not creepy in 2013. If I get a missed call from a business I don't recognise I Google the number and usually I find out who was calling and mostly what it would be about.

 

As a punter you should be checking cross referencing phone numbers/profiles and pictures. It makes complete sense if you are going to spend a lot of money on something/service to find out as much information about it as you can in the public domain. I've googled numbers and found details of scams, and links to profiles which are clearly not the same person so it's very useful to do this sometimes as a check.

 

You have not infringed her privacy in any way, she made the information public and you found it. You then try to help her...What a creep!  She's making out as if you went Columbo on her when all you did was put her phone number into Google as a  basic check. She then tries to get you blacklisted for trying to help her, by using your information that you supplied in good faith, she's the creep.  Seriously, she's a moron and a drama queen.

 

When doing reverse image searches on Google to check for fake pics, I have found that  some ladies have even used their "escort pics" in "real life" media profiles which can be linked by Google. I won't be telling them, because that's just "creepy." 

 

Last year I was at a lady's house, she had certificates on her wall with her real name and place of work detailed. I didn't say anything, pointing that out would be "creepy"

 

It's so ridiculous - Look out those horrible punters are out to get you! - with the information you put out on display. Yikes!

Edited by willsmith

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Like the OP I carried out a "risk assessment" & found out the lady in question used her phone number to advertise on gum tree for a baby sitter !!..... I mentioned this to the lady towards the end of the booking after we had a nice time together & she was appalled she had put herself in that situation & thanked me & changed the gum tree number.

 

Carrying out a risk assessment is a good idea....

 

but when you found out all she was doing was selling cleaning products prob to earn a bit of extra money what was the need to sound her out about it?..... help her not getting outed??..... 

 

Like most people I'm sure she does not take kindly to strangers ( esp on a site which is renown for time wasters, both SP & clients* ) telling her how to live her life, maybe you could have bought it if you decided to book her & spent some intimate time with her as she might then be interested in what you have to say.

 

 

 

* ....before someone moans about how SP are happy to meet strangers for a bonk, Some people forget most SP treat escorting purely as a business & don't take kindly to someone they have not met giving them advice about their personal life.

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Wonder why she thought it was creepy? I wouldn't mind if my number was googled. Why would I?

 

You did her a favour. You are not the only one who does searches, and the next person may not have been as helpful as you. Only takes one wally to make trouble for her. Hopefully she's seen sense and got a seperate number for escorting/private life

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There is imo an art to trying to be helpful.  I don't personally think the OP did anything wrong in principle, however it is not something I would do because of the risk of my motives being misunderstood.

 

I've seen photos, text info, or website registration details which I've thought unwise for the service provider to be disclosing.  On a couple of occasions I have said something to the WG concerned, but in those cases there has already been an established "relationship" between us, so I would hope that she did not take my remarks to be of a stalkerish nature.

 

In the other cases I've decided not to say anything because it is so easy for motives to be mis-interpreted, I think this info is far better discussed face to face to reduce the risk of misunderstandings.  Perhaps the OP could have gone through with his booking, and mentioned his concern at the end if he judged it ok to do so.  The outcome then might have been wholly different.

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Wonder why she thought it was creepy? I wouldn't mind if my number was googled. Why would I?

 

You did her a favour. You are not the only one who does searches, and the next person may not have been as helpful as you. Only takes one wally to make trouble for her. Hopefully she's seen sense and got a seperate number for escorting/private life

I think it can be quite alarming for some to have this done to them. Sometimes guys think it's being friendly, helpful or clever, or showing how 'genuine' they are to try and work out who you are, adamant you are such and such. I've also offered friendly advice at request to ladies new to the business, to be told Oh it'll be ok even if I am using an email linked to a personal facebook account.

 

At least you know you only had good intentions, but unfortunately have managed to scare her off.

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I once had a client bring my post upstairs for me (I work live in a small block of flats), obviously with my full real name on it. He was only being helpful as he said it was sitting in the door mat when I let him in.  I was a bit creeped out at the time, but didn't say so to him, because he seemed oblivious that it might be an issue and thought he was being helpful. I was more cross with myself for not thinking of this and now check there is no post for me before my first booking of the day. I think this guy was genuinely being kind and probably not the sort to care about my identity, but what if it had been a nutter or trouble maker? 

 

I could easily have shouted at him for being creepy and trying to find out more about me, but decided to take it in good faith and see it as an alert to my shoddy security!  I can see why an escort's immediate reaction might be to be defensive and worried though, but a shame because I do think the OP was genuinely being concerned and helpful.

 

I also think it's mad for escorts not to have separate work and personal phones for many reasons. 

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I have recently come to believe that the best thing is to pay your money, have a good time (hopefully), and bugger off home. Don't try to be helpful under any circumstances.

Leave the post lying on the mat. If she has a problem because she is silly enough not to keep her work phone strictly for work then then that's not your problem. Perhaps you feel that you can help her with a problem because you are a doctor or solicitor or dustbinman or policeman (?) Resist the impulse. It will backfire. Next week. Next month. Next year.

The OP is a case in point as to why you should keep it strictly business. It's a business for the ladies. A lady might like some punters more than others but it would be very unusual if any punter figured in the long term plans of any WG. So in the same way as WG's keep out of the lives of punters (hopefully) then punters should keep out of the lives of WG's.

If you are specifically invited in then it's different. But then it's private and confidential. Both ways.

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I once had a client bring my post upstairs for me (I work live in a small block of flats), obviously with my full real name on it. He was only being helpful as he said it was sitting in the door mat when I let him in.  I was a bit creeped out at the time, but didn't say so to him, because he seemed oblivious that it might be an issue and thought he was being helpful. I was more cross with myself for not thinking of this and now check there is no post for me before my first booking of the day. I think this guy was genuinely being kind and probably not the sort to care about my identity, but what if it had been a nutter or trouble maker? 

 

I could easily have shouted at him for being creepy and trying to find out more about me, but decided to take it in good faith and see it as an alert to my shoddy security!  I can see why an escort's immediate reaction might be to be defensive and worried though, but a shame because I do think the OP was genuinely being concerned and helpful.

 

I also think it's mad for escorts not to have separate work and personal phones for many reasons. 

The postman once gave a client the post for my address, thing is they didn't know them from Adam and not even at my door - simply asked "are you going to number 6?if so drop this off". I was pretty cross - at the postman, it is actually a serious offence to give the post to some random person to deliver. Some posties won't even give it to you outside the address.

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Hello Folks,

 

Long time lurker, I did post under another username but that email account is no longer active so, sorry for having to change.

 

It seems that I have upset one of the ladies from AW and know she is going to advise other girls to stay clear of me....why is she taking such an action?

 

Well basically before I meet with anyone from any site I always do a search for the mobile phone number using google. The reason for this it quickly shows up some of the scammers who have multiple IDs or are shifting folk around (take some of the asians for starters)...also if anyone has written any FRs on other sites it usually brings them up as well.

 

The issue is that I did a search on a number and I found an advert in gumtree by the lady in question selling some a some household goods (no not the naughty kind). I thought oh thats not so good that info being linked to the ladys phone number as some folk might use it for the WRONG reasons.

 

I decided to info the lady of this and she came back, very nicely written may I add, and said my email was distrubing that I had carried out such a search and that she would not want to meet someone that did such a thing.

 

So now she is going to post on the AW escort forum about me being creepy. So it seems that these days your not allowed to do a search on the person that you wish to spend time and money with to make sure that the person is not a false AW profile or some sort of mobile number being used all over the place for multiple women.

 

I think the mistake I made was actually advising the woman in question about the results of a harmless search. It seems that you try and do the right thing but its taken totally out of context. I suppose I have learned my lesson, next time I will not bother and maybe the woman in question will have learned a lesson and be careful about what she does.

 

Take care folks

J

Why go this far?  What the fuck

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I would expect clients to double check numbers ect in light of the amount of scammers out there and also they are allowed to ensure they are not at risk from us as much as we are them.  The girl is over reacting (not that its not understandable because some guys are obsessive and creepy, who knows she may have been victim of someone like this and now over sensitive). 

 

Some girls are incredibly stupid in the places they put things, that's down to them not their clients. If she does mention it on AW and puts your details there why not just direct her to this thread?

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I would expect clients to double check numbers ect in light of the amount of scammers out there and also they are allowed to ensure they are not at risk from us as much as we are them.  The girl is over reacting (not that its not understandable because some guys are obsessive and creepy, who knows she may have been victim of someone like this and now over sensitive). 

 

Some girls are incredibly stupid in the places they put things, that's down to them not their clients. If she does mention it on AW and puts your details there why not just direct her to this thread?

 

Punter would be deemed even more creepy for giving further advice, lol.

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Why go this far?  What the fuck

 

 

I would expect clients to double check numbers ect in light of the amount of scammers out there and also they are allowed to ensure they are not at risk from us as much as we are them.  The girl is over reacting (not that its not understandable because some guys are obsessive and creepy, who knows she may have been victim of someone like this and now over sensitive). 

 

Some girls are incredibly stupid in the places they put things, that's down to them not their clients. If she does mention it on AW and puts your details there why not just direct her to this thread?

I think Holly hit the nail on the head Sarah.

 

Are you under the impression that only service providers are taking a risk by letting men into their homes?

 

The clients are also taking a risk, there are more and more unscrupulous people out there who are quite happy to steal from the unsuspecting, usually with menaces.  There was a WG recently imprisoned for just that offence, she had an AW account, had the guys come round to an appointment, and then with the aid of her boyfriend relieved the client of his valuables.

 

You don't know if the OP has been or felt threatened in the past, and is merely taking a precaution for his own safety.  Maybe he didn't need to tell the woman in question that he had seen her gumtree ad though.

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I think Holly hit the nail on the head Sarah.

 

Are you under the impression that only service providers are taking a risk by letting men into their homes?

 

The clients are also taking a risk, there are more and more unscrupulous people out there who are quite happy to steal from the unsuspecting, usually with menaces.  There was a WG recently imprisoned for just that offence, she had an AW account, had the guys come round to an appointment, and then with the aid of her boyfriend relieved the client of his valuables.

 

You don't know if the OP has been or felt threatened in the past, and is merely taking a precaution for his own safety.  Maybe he didn't need to tell the woman in question that he had seen her gumtree ad though.

 

This is still happening in my neck of the woods (Loughborough). Her profile is active, feedback hidden so that even comments cannot be left there. We keep posting

updates of her mobile numbers, hoping punters google her mobile before going to see her.

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I once had a client bring my post upstairs for me (I work live in a small block of flats), obviously with my full real name on it. He was only being helpful as he said it was sitting in the door mat when I let him in.  I was a bit creeped out at the time, but didn't say so to him, because he seemed oblivious that it might be an issue and thought he was being helpful. I was more cross with myself for not thinking of this and now check there is no post for me before my first booking of the day. I think this guy was genuinely being kind and probably not the sort to care about my identity, but what if it had been a nutter or trouble maker? 

 

I could easily have shouted at him for being creepy and trying to find out more about me, but decided to take it in good faith and see it as an alert to my shoddy security!  I can see why an escort's immediate reaction might be to be defensive and worried though, but a shame because I do think the OP was genuinely being concerned and helpful.

 

I also think it's mad for escorts not to have separate work and personal phones for many reasons. 

 

I've been in a similar situation to this, only in my case the post had arrived during the visit.  As I was leaving and the WG was showing me to the door it became apparent that the post had arrived.  In most non-punting situations I'd have picked it as a matter of courtesy, but being aware of the sensitivity of doing so in a punting context I did not.  I had no wish to spoil what had just been an excellent meeting :D

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The fact that she decided to use her private mobile for escrting puproses was her choice, stupid it may be. Most punters are aware

of this and use a separate punting SIM/Phone.

 

She displayed her number in an open forum, for the entire world to see. If john0711, or any other punter, wanted to carry out

a search, it would be of no one's business, as you are trying to minimise being scammed/conned or end up up seeing a

timewasting WG.

 

Nowadays, most people will google any small piece of info they have, if planning to spend money on a site, etc.

 

Perhaps john0711 was being too helpful and ended up with egg on his face. I myself would have done that as well,

to point out or advise the WG to get a separate phone for her escorting purposes.

 

In terms of her not wanting to see me as a result, I would move on. However, she may have been vindictive and left

a negative remark in the "notes" field (which punters can't see) informing other escorts what she thought of him.

Sadly, punters can't do much about this, other than to get their next WG booked/seen to post a positive note against them.

or perhaps she decided to use her escorting phone for the advert as she doesnt want to publicise her private number.

 

In this day and age with so many real creeps about its a no surprise reaction, over the top a bit yes but not a surprise. When we are interacting with others we dont know what their personal experiences have been in life, perhaps she had a stalker at one point, who knows. 

 

Best to do as you said and the OP just chalk it up and move on 

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You don't know if the OP has been or felt threatened in the past, and is merely taking a precaution for his own safety.  Maybe he didn't need to tell the woman in question that he had seen her gumtree ad though.

and we also dont know if the woman in question has had those same experiences in the past either

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I've been in a similar situation to this, only in my case the post had arrived during the visit. As I was leaving and the WG was showing me to the door it became apparent that the post had arrived. In most non-punting situations I'd have picked it as a matter of courtesy, but being aware of the sensitivity of doing so in a punting context I did not. I had no wish to spoil what had just been an excellent meeting :D

I had virtually the identical situation last week. As I was being shown out there was a Royal Mail note hanging from the letter box saying that they'd tried delivering a parcel. I instinctively took a few steps back whilst the lady dealt with it.

DG

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IMHO the WG is going well OTT. The OP was trying to help her, but she is obviously rather sensitive about her personal information, so in fact she should be thanking the OP, rather than chastising him.

 

As for the OP, he is guilty of a little naivety in trying to help a WG whom he has not met, but of nothing more sinister.

 

I helped my favourite lady when mistakenly she posted her private mobile number on an advert. I advised her straight away, and she removed it within 10 minutes. Googling that number would have revealed everything about her personal life, family, etc. etc. 

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You can understand gentlemen taking precautions but maybe next time just mention it to her afterwards.  That way she can see and understand that you are not someone she needs to be weary of.

 

i had a gentlemen pop in a while back and as I work from home, he apparently did a search of my address and got my name etc and all my previous addresses, now this freaked the proverbial crap out of me.  As am I not entitled to my privacy, it still has made me a bit cautious of the person and would love to know his reasoning behind it.  But it seems as a sex worker I am not entitled to privacy or anonymity.

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