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Why Married Punters Should Be Very, Very Careful

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After  being married for 44 years, I took a careful  look at my wife one  day and said,  "Darling, 44 years ago we had a cheap apartment,  a cheap  car,  slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black  and white TV, but I got  to sleep every night with a hot 25-year-old  girl.  Now I have a $500,000.00 home, a $45,000.00 car,  nice big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 65-year-old woman.  It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman.  She told me to go out and find a hot 25-year-old girl, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white  TV.

 

 

Mods: If this is in the wrong place, apologies; please move or delete it.

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Going by the example of the other thread going on "Do I shag the Missus or the escort"..

 

This has the look of a 6 pager as well................... :D

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After  being married for 44 years, I took a careful  look at my wife one  day and said,  "Darling, 44 years ago we had a cheap apartment,  a cheap  car,  slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black  and white TV, but I got  to sleep every night with a hot 25-year-old  girl.  Now I have a $500,000.00 home, a $45,000.00 car,  nice big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 65-year-old woman.  It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman.  She told me to go out and find a hot 25-year-old girl, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white  TV.

 

 

Mods: If this is in the wrong place, apologies; please move or delete it.

This is the sort of joke that went out with Jim Davidson.............

 

I love the bit where you say we had this that and the other and now I have ......................

 

She also gets to sleep with an old man, so who's the unlucky one?

 

LOL

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This is the sort of joke that went out with Jim Davidson.............

 

Sorry, Sarah!

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Sorry, Sarah!

 

 

Why sorry...

 

It is only a joke right....?

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Too right you need to be careful mate, you told your 69 year old wife that you're sleeping with a 65 year old woman, she may not approve of that!

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It is a joke, but truth :-)

 

Thats why I always wanted to have everything when Im young. I think it feels different when you have brand new car of your dream when you are 20-25 not 45-55, it feels different, you do enjoy things much more when you young. Going out with your friends, show off, etc. What to do when you old :-/   To dream, to be young again and to have a crap car?! hm.... confused

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Too right you need to be careful mate, you told your 69 year old wife that you're sleeping with a 65 year old woman, she may not approve of that!

 

You're right!

 

Are you an auditor by profession?

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Why is a woman like a tropical storm......

Because when you first meet, she blows in all gentle, wet and warm, then the anger starts and you are all in a whirl. Then she fucks off, taking everything including the house with her, leaving you to pick up the pieces.

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I bet there are a lot more sexist jokes lurking out there somewhere!

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I would have thought a better reason to be careful would be in case the wife finds out and cuts the little fella of whilst your sleeping

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I would have thought a better reason to be careful would be in case the wife finds out and cuts the little fella of whilst your sleeping

 

She might even be lurking behind that glory hole you think you booked without her knowing - I just hope for your sake it's not rusty (d'oh, I don't mean the clown!) :o

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Hey, I thought this was going to be a serious topic.  

 

The answer is delete and deny everything....and wipe that silly smile off your face.

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Hey, I thought this was going to be a serious topic.  

 

The answer is delete and deny everything....and wipe that silly smile off your face.

Who#s to say i wasn't being serious.It has happened

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I'm sure you're not alone (assuming it happened to you)  Now, let's open up the topic:  what does one do when the trouble and strife discovers your trips to the cinema, pub, chiropractor, etc. were actually punts?

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I'm sure you're not alone (assuming it happened to you)  Now, let's open up the topic:  what does one do when the trouble and strife discovers your trips to the cinema, pub, chiropractor, etc. were actually punts?

 

wrong question. you should be asking how to make sure she never finds out.

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That's relatively easy and has been covered before, I think; my question is more difficult.

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Christ i'm going to start running seminars for women....he's providing you with a lovely life you love each other as friends....................let him go bang another woman, just look the other way........smile at the honey i'm late home from the office lies.......... enjoy your lovely family life and go do some baking Jesus just get really pissed about some women.

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What makes you think they don't know.... ?

 

Many wives would be more than happy to pass the sex stuff off to another woman.... 

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I'm sure you're not alone (assuming it happened to you)  Now, let's open up the topic:  what does one do when the trouble and strife discovers your trips to the cinema, pub, chiropractor, etc. were actually punts?

I've heard runnings good,maybe hiding all sharp impliments :)

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Christ i'm going to start running seminars for women....he's providing you with a lovely life you love each other as friends....................let him go bang another woman, just look the other way........smile at the honey i'm late home from the office lies.......... enjoy your lovely family life and go do some baking Jesus just get really pissed about some women.

 

Heather, why aren't women like you? No really...Jesus Christ, you've summed it all up in two lines. Not one in a thousand of them that understand though.

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After  being married for 44 years, I took a careful  look at my wife one  day and said,  "Darling, 44 years ago we had a cheap apartment,  a cheap  car,  slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black  and white TV, but I got  to sleep every night with a hot 25-year-old  girl.  Now I have a $500,000.00 home, a $45,000.00 car,  nice big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 65-year-old woman.  It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman.  She told me to go out and find a hot 25-year-old girl, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white  TV.

 

 

Mods: If this is in the wrong place, apologies; please move or delete it.

 

 

http://www.dirtybutton.com/media/db911-was-his-license-plate.jpg

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This is the sort of joke that went out with Jim Davidson.............

 

I love the bit where you say we had this that and the other and now I have ......................

 

She also gets to sleep with an old man, so who's the unlucky one?

 

LOL

Jings Sarah Summers! How old are you? Jim Davidson?  Wasn't he a role model for that other has been Jamie Oliver? 

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Great joke. Made me laugh anyway. But I know a case in point.

Gentleman Punter of very considerable wealth came home from holiday in the Pacific and introduced his wife to his future wife.

Marriage followed divorce.

He lived just a short time before his heart gave up the unequal fight.

The subsequent legal battle lasted many years. Considerably longer than he had lived to enjoy his new wife.

The solicitors made a killing and walked off with most of the loot.

Both girls were left just a little wiser but much poorer.

 

Hindsight is great. Both girls are still friends of mine, but not of each other. Had they known the legal fees, the pain and stress of years in litigation, they could have come to some arrangement and both would be wealthy today. There are lessons in there for punters, wives and younger models. Everyone else can learn to be solicitors.

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