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pollyp23

Advice Wanted From A Newbie: Can You Help?

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I got the following e-mail from a new, young SP.

 

I have encouraged her to join here, but she has very restricted access to the Internet.

 

I can convey any messages or advice to her, hopefully she will join, I have also pointed her in the direction of SAAFE.

 

'Hello. I am just messaging to ask a question..I hope you don't mind but you seem to know about this sort of thing and I'm still naive. I had a visitor a few days ago who turned up stinking of cider and brought some cans with him, I wasn't happy about it but he kind of pressured me so I went along with it, now he won't leave me alone. He knows where I live, he keeps calling me. I want him to leave me alone. How do I make him back off?'

 

Not unusual, I suspect, but as a newcomer, I think we could help her?

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Am I the only one thinking this is weird? She is targeting you, instead of requesting help from the whole board, particularly the other ladies who have considerable experience with situations like that. She can join anonymously, so what's the big deal about signing up. Why would she have "limited internet access" in this profession. How does she promote herself, then? She's doing the little girl lost - whatever you do, don't let her appeal to your chivalrous streak and agree to meet her to give the guy a stern talking to. You may leave the meeting minus your wallet and car keys, and a head wound requiring stitches.

Get back in touch, and tell her you'll help her sort it, and bring a couple of former colleagues you're still in touch with after your spell in the police force. You'll never hear from her again. Mind you, you haven't even spoken to her - what makes you sure you're dealing with a woman at all, not two burly muggers trawling boards for easy marks?

BTW, has she posted her problem on SAAFE? I couldn't seem to find it. Not genuine, me thinks.

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Am I the only one thinking this is weird? She is targeting you, instead of requesting help from the whole board, particularly the other ladies who have considerable experience with situations like that. She can join anonymously, so what's the big deal about signing up. Why would she have "limited internet access" in this profession. How does she promote herself, then? She's doing the little girl lost - whatever you do, don't let her appeal to your chivalrous streak and agree to meet her to give the guy a stern talking to. You may leave the meeting minus your wallet and car keys, and a head wound requiring stitches.

Get back in touch, and tell her you'll help her sort it, and bring a couple of former colleagues you're still in touch with after your spell in the police force. You'll never hear from her again. Mind you, you haven't even spoken to her - what makes you sure you're dealing with a woman at all, not two burly muggers trawling boards for easy marks?

BTW, has she posted her problem on SAAFE? I couldn't seem to find it. Not genuine, me thinks.

All bit harsh. I have spoken to her on the phone a number of times and I know one of the punters who has given her feedback.

 

She hasn't got a PC, have you ever tried using these sites on a 'phone?

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Pff, nice. Down arrow me - excuse me for being concerned for your safety.

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All bit harsh. I have spoken to her on the phone a number of times and I know one of the punters who has given her feedback.

 

She hasn't got a PC, have you ever tried using these sites on a 'phone?

Ah ok, you may have included that in your original post. Take it all back, then.

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If she hasn't got a PC, how on earth is she managing to circumnavigate Adultwork? And I don't understand why you're involved at all - your post suggests you haven't actually met her so why would she be asking you for advice. If you're not her client how does she even know you?

It's not as if you'd know the first thing about sex work (and I can only imagine some of the 'suggestions' you'd be offering based on some of your posts here). How to handle difficult punters/booking scenarios is a complicated issue all by itself which needs advice from experienced people who have been there and done it and if she's going to get anywhere with this she needs to get herself properly online so that she can get some proper support.

The best (and only) truly helpful thing you can do is firstly help her sort out a second hand laptop with some useful bookmarks and secondly, have enough self awareness to both know and tell her emphatically that you cannot possibly advise her on how to do her job and if she's going to be successfully self employed she badly needs to stop thinking you can.

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What do you mean by very restricted?If you mean phone access then this forum should be ok.If you mean none at all then theres always cyber cafes and if she was worried about discretion then lets face it,this site is quite discrete wihout any pics etc.
As for the initial problem,the person who wouldnt leave her alone.Theres only one solution for that and thats the old bill.
One final question.How did she email you?

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Pff, nice. Down arrow me - excuse me for being concerned for your safety.

NOw I've up arrowed you!

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If she hasn't got a PC, how on earth is she managing to circumnavigate Adultwork? And I don't understand why you're involved at all - your post suggests you haven't actually met her so why would she be asking you for advice. If you're not her client how does she even know you?

It's not as if you'd know the first thing about sex work (and I can only imagine some of the 'suggestions' you'd be offering based on some of your posts here). How to handle difficult punters/booking scenarios is a complicated issue all by itself which needs advice from experienced people who have been there and done it and if she's going to get anywhere with this she needs to get herself properly online so that she can get some proper support.

The best (and only) truly helpful thing you can do is firstly help her sort out a second hand laptop with some useful bookmarks and secondly, have enough self awareness to both know and tell her emphatically that you cannot possibly advise her on how to do her job and if she's going to be successfully self employed she badly needs to stop thinking you can.

I look after a number of profiles for Ladies who have restricted access, are not PC literate or have no/limited access.

 

Good idea on the laptop, though she doesn't have broadband.

 

All she was/is asking for is a little bit of advice, which as has been said, can't come from me, but might have come from SPs on here. I'd have thought that was a reasonable request?

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As for the initial problem,the person who wouldnt leave her alone.Theres only one solution for that and thats the old bill.
One final question.How did she email you?

 

She e-mailed me from her phone. Now, I'm far from and expert in these things, but the few times I have used my phone on AW, even on here, it gives me a very restricted selection and view of what is going on.

 

I will pass on the Old Bill suggestion, in the meantime, I'll see if she can join here and ask some questions herself.

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NOw I've up arrowed you!

Holey moley! Does that mean you have forgiven me for jumping to conclusions, kind sir?

You may think I'm overly suspicious and cynical, but shit happens, and it's not always the WG that's the victim. One of my regulars once got mugged heading for a work flat, and has a 4 inch scar on his head to prove it. He answers card in telephone box, follows instructions given by lady with sweet little voice, turns down an alley way and gets jumped by two hairy thugs. Took all of 10 seconds, and he's slumped on the ground minus his wallet, bleeding down his face, shirt, suit, having received a sharp crack over the head. You get the picture. And no, he didn't go to the cops. Most men don't, so I'm always a little worried when I read something like your OP. Apologies.

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Holey moley! Does that mean you have forgiven me for jumping to conclusions, kind sir?

You may think I'm overly suspicious and cynical, but shit happens, and it's not always the WG that's the victim. One of my regulars once got mugged heading for a work flat, and has a 4 inch scar on his head to prove it. He answers card in telephone box, follows instructions given by lady with sweet little voice, turns down an alley way and gets jumped by two hairy thugs. Took all of 10 seconds, and he's slumped on the ground minus his wallet, bleeding down his face, shirt, suit, having received a sharp crack over the head. You get the picture. And no, he didn't go to the cops. Most men don't, so I'm always a little worried when I read something like your OP. Apologies.

No need to apologise and I thank you for your concern.

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I've cleaned this thread up to delete all references to voting up/down, toys out of pram and blancmange.

(I may have made the last one up.)

 

Can posters bear in mind that this is the legalities section where serious advice is sought and given ?

 

Many thanks. 

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I look after a number of profiles for Ladies who have restricted access, are not PC literate or have no/limited access.

 

Good idea on the laptop, though she doesn't have broadband.

 

All she was/is asking for is a little bit of advice, which as has been said, can't come from me, but might have come from SPs on here. I'd have thought that was a reasonable request?

You do realise you can buy pay as you go dongles? And you manage their profiles for them?I presume as they don't have access that would also mean answering their messages,online bookings etc.And you do all this out of the goodness of your heart?

Also,many of the ladies and gents on here who don't have a problem with using this forum on their phones.To be completely frank.There are two conclussions that i can come to from what you've posted.Your either a complete Walter or you're some kind of pimp

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You do realise you can buy pay as you go dongles? And you manage their profiles for them?I presume as they don't have access that would also mean answering their messages,online bookings etc.And you do all this out of the goodness of your heart?

Also,many of the ladies and gents on here who don't have a problem with using this forum on their phones.To be completely frank.There are two conclussions that i can come to from what you've posted.Your either a complete Walter or you're some kind of pimp

I have taken pictures and videos and written their profiles up and leave them to it. If changes are required, then I do those too.

 

I have tried using this forum and AW on my phone and yes, its possible, but its not exactly easy. Setting a profile up would be impossible, I'd say, answering e-mails and accepting bookings so so.

 

Edit: when I say ladies, it is only a handful, 5 over other past 10 years, three of who have now retired or moved on.

Edited by pollyp23

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All sorts of problems can arise from ladies only being able to access forums and advertising from their phones and the AW app only has limited functions.

 

First piece of advice is keep boundaries clear, if someone turns up on the doorstep without an appointment be firm. Second make sure home security is up to scratch. Third if someone is becoming a pain in the neck keep records, tell him you'll report him to the police, and if he doesn't leave you alone then seriously consider that course of action. Harassment is an offence and so long as you make it clear you want the harasser to leave you alone, and don't feed or engage then he could be looking at criminal charges, or enough for the police to go round and have a word.

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All sorts of problems can arise from ladies only being able to access forums and advertising from their phones and the AW app only has limited functions.

 

First piece of advice is keep boundaries clear, if someone turns up on the doorstep without an appointment be firm. Second make sure home security is up to scratch. Third if someone is becoming a pain in the neck keep records, tell him you'll report him to the police, and if he doesn't leave you alone then seriously consider that course of action. Harassment is an offence and so long as you make it clear you want the harasser to leave you alone, and don't feed or engage then he could be looking at criminal charges, or enough for the police to go round and have a word.

Thanks for that advice, I'll pass it on, though Tuesdays is a no, no for internet access for the Lady.

Edited by pollyp23

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Advice taken, hassle stopped. Mum and Dad approached for Notebook for Christmas.

 

I do like a happy ending...

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