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Lynn

He who pays....

23 posts in this topic

.... the piper... calls the tune

is the old saying....

so I am asking ( I don't take part in or start polls ) which of you gentle:rolleyes:men are on the piper's side and believe that just because you are parting with the cash, you can dictate what the lady does/wears etc?

I am not ONLY talking about requests for outfits or the usual requirements for particular services etc... but the stance that if you are paying then the lady has little say in how the appointment goes.

Or do you behave properly and know your place :)

I have only once in 6 years met a client who mentioned those immortal words " I am the one paying" and he was NOT referring to his appointment with ME... he was recounting a story about another lady he had met.

I doubt any man would dare use that phrase with me.

Answers on the back of a popcorn box please......... :)

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But in our case the piper is part of a duet - or trio, etc. if lucky - and is not, ahem, a soloist.

I haven't and wouldn't say "I'm the one paying, therefore...", however I do make requests that I don't consider unreasonable, usually about dress, as I'm not a big fan of elaborate lingerie - I adore flesh and prefer my women in their birthday suits, at least eventually not necessarily straight off the bat! I think it's key to make reasonable requests in a courteous manner - informed by available information, e.g. WG or agency website.

Whether or not the lady chooses to concur is, of course, up to her. As I mentioned in another thread I wouldn't want a woman I was with, WG or not, to do anything with me that she didn't want to or felt uncomfortable with - that obviously goes for services as well. If she doesn't want to meet my request, which has only happened rarely, then I simply chalk it down to experience and maybe wouldn't rebook.

But to go back to where I started, there has to be some mutuality in a booking and without that the encounter will be at best pedestrian; I guess we all need to know our place - as it were. I know some won't agree but although this pastime is part of the service industry the intimacy involved is unparalleled; because it's not the same as purchasing consumer advice or financial services a big grey area exists that is sometimes exploited on both sides of the fence.

Btw, do you have plans to visit London or the south east on tour?

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i am always mindful that i'm paying for an intimate service & like to show respect as i hope it will be reciprocated

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Sometimes guys will request a certain style of lingerie, colour etc that just doesn't suit my figure or colouring. Sometimes I've obtained and worn said things and the guy has not been impressed - but he asked so can't really complain!

Most of the time I will advise something that does suit me though and come to a compromise.

Red stockings are a good example. On the right lady they are very sexy for many men. On me they look horrific!!!Although I do have some red & black lace-topped, black sheer ones which are just about the right amount and shade of red for me. Thigh boots also a no-no since I'm quite short and they'd cover most of my very shapely legs. I'd look like a pair of boots with a bum stuck on top of them.

Same with services if it's something I know I can't offer, would feel silly/awkward performing it or would cause me distress I will say so. No matter how good an actress some blokes think we may be I'm sure most guys would not be turned on by a WG who switched off because they were doing something they weren't comfy with. Worse still got emotional mid session.

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But in our case the piper is part of a duet - or trio, etc. if lucky - and is not, ahem, a soloist.

I haven't and wouldn't say "I'm the one paying, therefore...", however I do make requests that I don't consider unreasonable, usually about dress, as I'm not a big fan of elaborate lingerie - I adore flesh and prefer my women in their birthday suits, at least eventually not necessarily straight off the bat! I think it's key to make reasonable requests in a courteous manner - informed by available information, e.g. WG or agency website.

Whether or not the lady chooses to concur is, of course, up to her. As I mentioned in another thread I wouldn't want a woman I was with, WG or not, to do anything with me that she didn't want to or felt uncomfortable with - that obviously goes for services as well. If she doesn't want to meet my request, which has only happened rarely, then I simply chalk it down to experience and maybe wouldn't rebook.

But to go back to where I started, there has to be some mutuality in a booking and without that the encounter will be at best pedestrian; I guess we all need to know our place - as it were. I know some won't agree but although this pastime is part of the service industry the intimacy involved is unparalleled; because it's not the same as purchasing consumer advice or financial services a big grey area exists that is sometimes exploited on both sides of the fence.

Btw, do you have plans to visit London or the south east on tour?

You're my kind of punter, Freamon, and I'm sure that your tactics pay off. We're really just doing what comes naturally bu tit tends to be appreciated - and rewarded.:)

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When I meet a lady I want her to see me as a gentleman, and I think it would be appaling to turn up and demand something she's not keen to provide. In a sense I never understand services being described as 'at discretion' - as far as I'm concerned everything the lady does (within reason!) from the moment she opens the door to the moment it closes behind me is at her discretion. Surely there aren't really punters out there so crass that they would say "it's on your list so just get on with it"? :)

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tit tends to be appreciated - and rewarded.:)

Certainly does...:)

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Certainly does...;)
that's bu tit. Only for connoisseurs.:D

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If any client asking me to wear something which I dislike/don't feel comfortable...theirs enquiry goes back on the pile.

In the past I used to ask clients what they would like me to wear or bring along. I don't do it anymore. Because from a past experience, I know if I will ask, the list will be longer the menu in Chinese restaurant.

Fortunately, most say: your choice, and I am sure you will look beautiful in the knitted jumper by your granny with big red nose of reindeer on it..or is it reindeer with big red nose?

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If any client asking me to wear something which I dislike/don't feel comfortable...theirs enquiry goes back on the pile.

In the past I used to ask clients what they would like me to wear or bring along. I don't do it anymore. Because from a past experience, I know if I will ask, the list will be longer the menu in Chinese restaurant.

Fortunately, most say: your choice, and I am sure you will look beautiful in the knitted jumper by your granny with big red nose of reindeer on it..or is it reindeer with big red nose?

Your granny sounds perfect to me. I won't ask any pointed questions but I suppose I left it too long before visiting the Ukraine.;)

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My regular says the client is always right unless its me, I don't argue as it would be impolite to disturb her when she is giving the best blow job ever. ;):D:eek:

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But in our case the piper is part of a duet - or trio, etc. if lucky - and is not, ahem, a soloist.

I haven't and wouldn't say "I'm the one paying, therefore...", however I do make requests that I don't consider unreasonable, usually about dress, as I'm not a big fan of elaborate lingerie - I adore flesh and prefer my women in their birthday suits, at least eventually not necessarily straight off the bat! I think it's key to make reasonable requests in a courteous manner - informed by available information, e.g. WG or agency website.

Whether or not the lady chooses to concur is, of course, up to her. As I mentioned in another thread I wouldn't want a woman I was with, WG or not, to do anything with me that she didn't want to or felt uncomfortable with - that obviously goes for services as well. If she doesn't want to meet my request, which has only happened rarely, then I simply chalk it down to experience and maybe wouldn't rebook.

But to go back to where I started, there has to be some mutuality in a booking and without that the encounter will be at best pedestrian; I guess we all need to know our place - as it were. I know some won't agree but although this pastime is part of the service industry the intimacy involved is unparalleled; because it's not the same as purchasing consumer advice or financial services a big grey area exists that is sometimes exploited on both sides of the fence.

Btw, do you have plans to visit London or the south east on tour?

Good post but you take a different view to me on a couple of points. If services have been agreed initially and i arrive clean, hygienic and courteous i wouldnt be happy that she has lied to me about whats on offer. I always ask for confirmation politely before the punt starts, if her services have changed since we spoke on the phone i would usually walk, if she agrees then says such and such is not on offer after stashing my cash i would chalk it down to experience and consider her to have scammed me.

I dont think there has to be mutuality in a booking, it depends what a punter is looking for, personally i much prefer mutuality. Naked is best for me as well, i find clothes of any kind a distraction from admiring the female form.;)

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I pay for a service with a pleasant, happy, willing WG -that's what I want. I won't get that if I stamp my feet and come on with the bad attitude. (That's not why I don't come on with the bad attitude, incidentally - I'm just a nice guy! ;))

You can go into a restaurant and smile and be polite to the staff and get a good meal - that's the approach I favour. Alternatively, you could go into a restaurant and shout and swear and abuse the staff and you may still get something on a plate but I wouldn't want to eat it!

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Alternatively, you could go into a restaurant and shout and swear and abuse the staff and you may still get something on a plate but I wouldn't want to eat it!

A very wise decision.

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I think Dylan Moran once summed this up perfectly at one of his gigs and bear in mind, I'm paraphrasing here but ...

" There's a gorgeous woman, who wants to go to bed with you, to be intimate, and you want her to dress like up a cake ? "

But don't mention the Japanese fighting spiders ...

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As long as the attitude is right, and asked is a polite way, then basically the girl should go with the clients wishes, providing it is not on her "dislikes list"

No, You wouldn't shout and swear to get your way in a restraunt, but you wouldn't let them dictate what you eat either.... and if you want two puddings, you have two puddings (as long as you pay for it)

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Good post but you take a different view to me on a couple of points. If services have been agreed initially and i arrive clean, hygienic and courteous i wouldnt be happy that she has lied to me about whats on offer. I always ask for confirmation politely before the punt starts, if her services have changed since we spoke on the phone i would usually walk, if she agrees then says such and such is not on offer after stashing my cash i would chalk it down to experience and consider her to have scammed me.

I dont think there has to be mutuality in a booking, it depends what a punter is looking for, personally i much prefer mutuality. Naked is best for me as well, i find clothes of any kind a distraction from admiring the female form.;)

Fair enough, and I have walked in the past especially with bait-and-switch merchants from the other site who then have the front to decline previously confirmed services.

But I'm more thinking about a grey area where it may or may not be a scam: 'discretionary services' are the obvious point - the service may be agreed on the phone and in person at the start of the session, let's say in good faith, and then not provided. Sometimes I've been told, after initial agreement, that I'm too big for A levels which may be a scam or genuine. Then again, just because some women have been able to accommodate me doesn't mean that all will be able to. And perhaps most importantly, if in that specific moment although she could physically manage me but suddenly doesn't feel like it, for whatever reason, then she doesn't feel like it, and there's nothing I could or would want to do at that point. I then chalk that down to experience and depending on the vibe may or may not consider myself scammed. To me it's simply part of the swings and roundabouts of this pastime - the upside is when you have one of those spectacular and totally unexpected sessions that surpass all prior expectations! Hopefully it all evens out, or you even finish ahead.

My baseline for mutuality is a basic level of mutual respect and regard between two people - not necessarily a 'connection' or 'clicking', whatever that means. However, I do understand that for some mutuality is a misnomer or secondary to a pulse and a warm body! I don't really get that TBH: then again what I call pedestrian is perfectly satisfactory to some punters. I remember going to a Hunter's party somewhere in Kent years ago and this one guy - I'll never forget it - was humping away monotonously in doggy with a vacant stare on his face, he looked utterly dispassionate and bored. I remember thinking 'What's the point of that?'

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Fair enough, and I have walked in the past especially with bait-and-switch merchants from the other site who then have the front to decline previously confirmed services.

But I'm more thinking about a grey area where it may or may not be a scam: 'discretionary services' are the obvious point - the service may be agreed on the phone and in person at the start of the session, let's say in good faith, and then not provided. Sometimes I've been told, after initial agreement, that I'm too big for A levels which may be a scam or genuine. Then again, just because some women have been able to accommodate me doesn't mean that all will be able to. And perhaps most importantly, if in that specific moment although she could physically manage me but suddenly doesn't feel like it, for whatever reason, then she doesn't feel like it, and there's nothing I could or would want to do at that point. I then chalk that down to experience and depending on the vibe may or may not consider myself scammed. To me it's simply part of the swings and roundabouts of this pastime - the upside is when you have one of those spectacular and totally unexpected sessions that surpass all prior expectations! Hopefully it all evens out, or you even finish ahead.

My baseline for mutuality is a basic level of mutual respect and regard between two people - not necessarily a 'connection' or 'clicking', whatever that means. However, I do understand that for some mutuality is a misnomer or secondary to a pulse and a warm body! I don't really get that TBH: then again what I call pedestrian is perfectly satisfactory to some punters. I remember going to a Hunter's party somewhere in Kent years ago and this one guy - I'll never forget it - was humping away monotonously in doggy with a vacant stare on his face, he looked utterly dispassionate and bored. I remember thinking 'What's the point of that?'

Yet another good post. I understand what your saying.;)

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I think Dylan Moran once summed this up perfectly at one of his gigs and bear in mind, I'm paraphrasing here but ...

" There's a gorgeous woman, who wants to go to bed with you, to be intimate, and you want her to dress like up a cake ? "

But don't mention the Japanese fighting spiders ...

Well said, although you only restated it...it surely was worth mentioning...x

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I believe that a client should request a certain outfit if he so desires and request what sort of appointment type he's intrested in BUT the lady should decide how she goes about doing it.

If you went to a restuarant and requested Steak and Chips, you wouldnt then try to tell the chef how to go about cooking it would you? - The same applies in a punt I reckon.

Just my 2 cents worth

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I believe that a client should request a certain outfit if he so desires and request what sort of appointment type he's intrested in BUT the lady should decide how she goes about doing it.

If you went to a restuarant and requested Steak and Chips, you wouldnt then try to tell the chef how to go about cooking it would you? - The same applies in a punt I reckon.

Just my 2 cents worth

I would ! -- I like my steak " medium " and my chips crispy. ;)-- and I dont expect the chef to have a problem with that. the request is made within an accepted and reasonable range of instruction. seems to me the same principle should apply to a punt.

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Ok, but you check the menu before entering.

You don't go to a chippy & demand monkfish roast in garlic butter.

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You don't go to a chippy & demand monkfish roast in garlic butter.

Unless you live in East Dulwich.

My list is short: summat black and sexy, and heels.

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