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cumandgo

If Men Spent Their Punting Money On Their Partners Instead......

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

Edited by cumandgo

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

Only you can predict x

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I have a client/friend who keeps buying for me all those sexy little things his partner does not appreciate so I guess lots of guys have tried this route.  I most surely appreciate his efforts, plus we always have a great time that keeps us for longer. 

 

Most surely you can try with your partner and eventually discuss if she is going to 'perceive' your efforts differently in the future. 

 

On the other hand I remember meeting a guy once who said that he would like me to be his 'girlfriend' and give me £200 for spending the night with him, purely because lots of girls accepted that in the past, even shagging their bottoms.  I asked: 'do you do that with your wife?' to which he replied: 'no, never'.  Yet he kept showing off what cars they were both driving and where they lived with wifey patiently waiting for him at his house in the home counties!!!! 

 

'Try somewhere else' I thought to myself.

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It makes no difference. I booked a valentines dinner a few years back at a top class restaurant for mrs lessingham's birthday. I arranged for flowers to be brought to the table and we had a fabulous night cost me about the going rate for a punt. We got home and she

dived for the video to watch her programmes she'd recorded. I went to bed alone.

Which shows that either you cannot win with wives or I am so inept in bed I get beaten by recordings of soaps.

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I wouldn't make any difference in my case due to the reasons we don't have sex...

I try and restrict my punting budget to what I'd spend on myself anyway on other interests so that my partner and I can still do stuff we enjoy together. Although in saying that I'm sure what I spend on punting could and should be getting spent in other areas of my life!

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

 

Its rather pointless to spent any (punting or otherwise) money on the partner/wife/SO. After all I am sure most have the same kitty. So when he spents money to buy me presents, he spents "OURS"money, so I dont benefit from it. (apart of his romantic, but rather useless gesture).

 

If my husband going to spent few hundreds on me, I would not be impressed, because he will be taking money from our family budget. Anything apart of flowers, every present will be taken straight back to the shop for a refund. If I want to buy something I just do it myself and will choose something what I really like.  No need to wait for any occasion like Valentine/Birthday/Christmas, etc.

 

Of course, when clients buy it for you, its a different matter, but I would feel sorry for theirs partners, if they spent some of the family budget on me which theirs wife contributed to it also.

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I doubt it would make any difference.

I'm fortunate in that after several years in the doldrums my home sex life took a turn for the better about 18 months ago, but it had nothing to do with any changes I made, but quite a bit to do with a certain book by E L James...

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Sounds like you are just trying to bribe her into sex :P

 

It is only ever going to end in tears ;)

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

Yes, it would.  For the worse.

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

 

Not only it is a waste of time, but it is likely to backfire.  If you want to improve your sex life in your marriage (or even relationship), then read and apply "The Married Man Sex Life Primer" by Athol Kay.

 

Good luck.

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Xenia hit the nail on the head and that's exactly the same way I would feel.  Try cleaning the house from top to bottom, putting fresh sheets on the bed and running her a nice bath.  Won't cost you much.  Most women want you to put more effort in helping them become less tired rather than spending joint money on them.

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

Nice one.Good on you for making an attempt and putting some effort in.That said,i think you may have more success with Hollys suggestions,or maybe a combination of the two

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If you want to improve your sex life in your marriage (or even relationship), then read and apply "The Married Man Sex Life Primer" by Athol Kay.

 

Looks fascinating - would you mind summarising the main points?

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Looks fascinating - would you mind summarising the main points?

 

Here we go:

- you have been brainwashed regarding relationships;

- you wear the trousers, she wears the skirt, and everything will fall in place.

 

If you are married, or are looking for a long-term relationship, that book is worth the money. I find the author's humour to be horrible, but just look past it.

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Xenia hit the nail on the head and that's exactly the same way I would feel. Try cleaning the house from top to bottom,

She'd think I was trying to hide something

putting fresh sheets on the bed

She'd *know* I was trying to hide something

running her a nice bath.

She'd think I wanted to drown her...

:P

Edited by Burty

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She'd think I was trying to hide something

 

And this would be more effective than you think.  Wives lose interest in their husbands in part because husbands let their wives read them like open books with big characters.

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

 

She will assume you are guilty of something.

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....... would it transform their sex lives ?

 

I thought I might start an experiment where I channel my punting funds towards my SO. Maybe some sexy underwear, flowers for no reason, a nice dress ,  candlelit dinners on a night away, whatever...... a sustained campaign . Or  is it all a complete waste of time ??   :D

 

Wast of time and effort - went there and got the T-shirt, anything from romantic nights in to flowers to surprise weekends away to doing the housework / cleaning / cooking made not one iota of difference. Once wives have decided they have what they want in terms of lifestyle - kids , nice house , car etc etc they shut off sexually. Sad but true. Rumor has it they then start rubbing germolene on their fanny to try to seal it up...  (joke)

 

 

 

 

She'd think I was trying to hide somethingShe'd *know* I was trying to hide somethingShe'd think I wanted to drown her...

:P

 

LOL !!

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Tried all of that and still help with kids, housework and i even cook on weekends, hasn't made an iota of difference to our sexual frequency - easier to punt and not feel guilty about it.

She needs handbags and shoes ... I need sex

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I think everyone and every relationship is different however there are a combination of possibly factors which may be similar from relationship to relationship, which add up to couples no longer having an active sex life..

 

Firstly yes making sure the hard work is done can help, and be something some partners, male or female take for granted. Secondly many women still grow up with the opinion sex is dirty, or sinful, or something to be done once in while as a 'treat', or as a way to have children, then there's the years of building up various resentments, a word mis-said or misinterpretted, a wrongly placed compliment or criticism, it all builds up until partners who would swear blind they communicate are just passing the time withholding sex as part of the grudge, not challenging any underlying feelings. Add to this growing older, feeling their body is changing, hormones changing, life situations and unless you have some good self-knowledge, self-awareness and are able to confront some of the deep-seated stuff, or even explore it before it builds, then you have two people highly likely to not be having sex, and without some sort of huge magic wand doing the housework, or taking each other out for a meal isn't going to suddenly going to wipe away all the layers built up over months, years and quite probably decades. 

Edited by Strawberry
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I tried this method a long time ago. I actually bought some very sexy lingerie and some ribbed condoms. 

 

The lingerie is still lying around somewhere probably with cob webs all over it. The condoms had to be thrown away as they had gone past their expiry date. Dinners have never worked, as the more she eats the more she sleeps. 

 

I think that once your sex life with your SO starts going down, there is no way back up. The law of gravity ensures that it stays down.

 

I have found that investing in reviving your sex life with your SO has a zero rate of return. in fact, its a negative rate of return because each time money is spent in that direction you forego the opportunity to punt, assuming monetary constraints are relevant to you.

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I have a client/friend who keeps buying for me all those sexy little things his partner does not appreciate so I guess lots of guys have tried this route.  I most surely appreciate his efforts, plus we always have a great time that keeps us for longer. 

 

Most surely you can try with your partner and eventually discuss if she is going to 'perceive' your efforts differently in the future. 

 

On the other hand I remember meeting a guy once who said that he would like me to be his 'girlfriend' and give me £200 for spending the night with him, purely because lots of girls accepted that in the past, even shagging their bottoms.  I asked: 'do you do that with your wife?' to which he replied: 'no, never'.  Yet he kept showing off what cars they were both driving and where they lived with wifey patiently waiting for him at his house in the home counties!!!! 

 

'Try somewhere else' I thought to myself.

Yes thats very nice but you are not their wife are you? Surely the discussion is about wether spending money on their wives/partners would get the train chugging into the station. Our station doors are on automatic open once they are in our bedroom regardless of wether they buy us nice presses or not so its not the same situation.

 

I agree with whoever said it, giving your wife a couple of days at a health spa to relax then return to find an overnight nanny for the children and a reservation at a nice hotel would be more likely to lead to a marital bonk than to spend lots of money on frilly underwear that she may not even like x

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I tried this method a long time ago. I actually bought some very sexy lingerie and some ribbed condoms. 

 

The lingerie is still lying around somewhere probably with cob webs all over it. The condoms had to be thrown away as they had gone past their expiry date. Dinners have never worked, as the more she eats the more she sleeps. 

 

I think that once your sex life with your SO starts going down, there is no way back up. The law of gravity ensures that it stays down.

 

I have found that investing in reviving your sex life with your SO has a zero rate of return. in fact, its a negative rate of return because each time money is spent in that direction you forego the opportunity to punt, assuming monetary constraints are relevant to you.

tbh I tend to agree here. Once I really didnt fancy fucking my ex husband any more it was just never the same. Had he provided a nice home and car plus holidays for the kids I would likely have lost the urge to copulate with him a lot later than I actually did as i would generally have been happier with him but he changed after the kids were born. You guys think WE change…you have no idea..you guys do. We catch you looking at our fannys in a funny way the first couple of times sex occurs after the babies are born….puts you right off letting him see it again…if truth be told x

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In my humble opinion I think the problem is the age old problem of what do women want. There are women who have no ides what they want and so tell their husbands to behave as women's magazines say they should. There are woman who know what they want but tell their husbands differently either for a quiet life or not to hurt their feelings. And there are women who dare not say what they want.

And of course there are husbands who are told one thing but hear something completely different.

So you get husbands working hard to provide the things a wife does not want and cannot understand why the hell she is pissed off.

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Lessingham, 'why the hell she is pissed off' brougth a smile to my face, thank you.

 

I must be very fortunate though, or my ex partners must have been fortunate as I never said no to any of their very little efforts and I remember on so many occassions I was like a zombie next day, plus with 'lower' pain from so much shagging during the night and in the morning.

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I agree with the above statements regarding trying to no avail. 

 

My wife is a stay at home mum and I've attempted presents, roses, dinners, looking after the kids whilst she goes away on holidays, organising time for us to go away together, helping out around the home etc. Things pick up for a week or so, but then quickly dwindle off again.

 

As much as I hate to say it, I find that punting is cheaper and more enjoyable.....

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