MrUU

What Was Your Worst Ever Punt?

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I'm not into naming, shaming or embarrassing Working Girls who are legit but just, for whatever reason, didn't live up to expectation.  However if it's a matter of safety then name away.

 

I'm just interested, as a matter of learning lessons and what to look out for.

 

So what was your worst punt?

 

Mine:

 

Thornton Heath, I wanted a cheap punt, 40 cheat, but the pics looked decent.

 

Lady had a webbed foot and prickly stubble around the upper thighs, undercarriage, bum and an anal beard in such a way as to leave me questioning gender.  I was too scared to leave due to location so went through with it.

 

I don't think it was due to price as I've had a £50 punt last year that turned out to be one of my best ever.

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Like my ex girlfriend who walks with a limp and has a cleft lip and sprays snot over the place and dribbles :eek:

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i have seen a few in Soho who were not very nice and also very rude in attitude

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A guy who came the other day for an hour. Stunk to high heaven of fags and stale sweat. Dirty knob I had to scrape with several wet wipes and then put a condom on anyway as it was still stinky . On top of that he had a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp that was in a bad mood because the ugly stick had a field day on him. Too unfit to actually move around on the bed. Lay there like a crash test dummy and started sweating and huffing and puffing so much when did actually manage to move and he tried to fuck me from behind that I thought he was going to have a heart attack. He couldnt keep his hands off me though. I had to almost lever him off the bed to get him to leave and there was a massive wet patch where he had sweated. I waited till he left to have a shower as there is NO way I could get in the shower with him. I usually shower with my clients at the end. Had a good scrub when he left and had to change all my bedding and open the windows. Unfortunatley he paid my discount fee but this was one of those who the money really just wasnt worth it. Should have followed my gut and cancelled when I saw his miserable expression through the spy hole on my door but I just went down the "be professional" route  ;)

Edited by Chloe Kisses
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It was in the morning. The lady was half asleep and told me that she had received a client at 4 a.m.

 

She kept looking at me with disdain.  Apparently, she was pissed off as I had arrived later (because I couldn't find her flat, as the address was not on the map and she knew it).

 

She kept whining about how local people were unrefined (I am a foreigner, thus it is not like I was involved).

 

Half way through our booking, she asked me to pass her her phone as she wanted to check how much time was left, and proceeded to inform me that she had set an alarm.

 

Lessons learned: never book an escort that works 24 hours, and an escort that sounds unenthusiastic on the phone will be worse in person.

 

Another booking almost gone wrong was in a parlour with a "lady" who had posted fake pictures, had bad breath and looked stoned.  Since I asked and got my money back and left, I don't count it as a bad experience.

Edited by Malmostoso

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Another booking almost gone wrong was in a parlour with a "lady" who had posted fake pictures, had bad breath and looked stoned.  Since I asked and got my money back and left, I don't count it as a bad experience.

Sounds like a lucky escape  :)

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I got stung once. The girl took the money and then refused to do anything !  It was a surreal experience. It was abroad.  You have to take some on the chin.

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I'm not into naming, shaming or embarrassing Working Girls who are legit but just, for whatever reason, didn't live up to expectation.  However if it's a matter of safety then name away.

 

I'm just interested, as a matter of learning lessons and what to look out for.

 

So what was your worst punt?

 

Mine:

 

Thornton Heath, I wanted a cheap punt, 40 cheat, but the pics looked decent.

 

Lady had a webbed foot and prickly stubble around the upper thighs, undercarriage, bum and an anal beard in such a way as to leave me questioning gender.  I was too scared to leave due to location so went through with it.

 

I don't think it was due to price as I've had a £50 punt last year that turned out to be one of my best ever.

 

Luxury!

 

I had a man come to visit me and he sounded very nice on the phone.

 

In he comes and was wearing a Rab Nesbitt stained string vest..... had one tooth (it was neatly central though) a comb over hairstyle which you could fry fish fingers in..... tracksuit bottoms kept up with rope.... trainers which emitted a green cloud when he took them off..... he smelled good though..... well I have always loved the aroma of freshly cooked cabbage......... his fingernails were black but it was a fine contrast to the yellow skin....... and a hairy chest which I swear to this day had livestock lurking...... 

 

I could go on................. but I am all aroused and moist now..............be back in a while.......

 

:blink:

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What goes around comes around, deja vu.

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Saw an EE lady in London years ago. The smell down below lived with me for weeks afterwards ! :eek:

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Saw an EE lady in London years ago. The smell down below lived with me for weeks afterwards ! :eek:

Oh, that is bad indeed.

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Luxury!

I had a man come to visit me and he sounded very nice on the phone.

In he comes and was wearing a Rab Nesbitt stained string vest..... had one tooth (it was neatly central though) a comb over hairstyle which you could fry fish fingers in..... tracksuit bottoms kept up with rope.... trainers which emitted a green cloud when he took them off..... he smelled good though..... well I have always loved the aroma of freshly cooked cabbage......... his fingernails were black but it was a fine contrast to the yellow skin....... and a hairy chest which I swear to this day had livestock lurking......

I could go on................. but I am all aroused and moist now..............be back in a while.......

:blink:

Was promised a bond type blonde bombshell from an agency...a LADY turned up as you describe above (only a lot worse i kid you not) lol

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Had  booking once with a very old guy who stank of piss..honestly. Was a two girl. When we arrived in the room he had on a stretchy long leopard print dress with home made boobs. He had cut the corners off a couple of pillow cases, stuffed them then sewn the edges up with wool. They were the dirtiest fake tits I ever saw and when my mate shagged him up the bum with MY strap on…he shat all over it. I was underneath at the time being called a "dirty little niece" which I strongly refuted immediately …then I saw the look on her face and got a whiff…you never saw two girls scramble off a bed so fast. Then he made a complaint about US  :eek:

Edited by Chloe Kisses
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Had  booking once with a very old guy who stank of piss..honestly. Was a two girl. When we arrived in the room he had on a stretchy long leopard print dress with home made boobs. He had cut the corners off a couple of pillow cases, stuffed them then sewn the edges up with wool. They were the dirtiest fake tits I ever saw and when my mate shagged him up the bum with MY strap on…he shat all over it. I was underneath at the time being called a "dirty little niece" which I strongly refuted immediately …then I saw the look on her face and got a whiff…you never saw two girls scramble off a bed so fast. Then he made a complaint about US  :eek:

 

You have some incredible stories honey. I would love to read your book !! 

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I met a very well known WG . Just didnt fancy her at all. I could have been an international out-half, I kicked to touch so many times. I dont think she was amused when ultimately I gave her a peck on cheek and said my goodbyes.

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You have some incredible stories honey. I would love to read your book !! 

Lol…no point in me writing a book. Its all there already on this forum xx

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I got stung once. The girl took the money and then refused to do anything !  It was a surreal experience. It was abroad.  You have to take some on the chin.

 

Now that's a new one on me. Can you tell us how the dialogue went?

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Luxury!

 

I had a man come to visit me and he sounded very nice on the phone.

 

In he comes and was wearing a Rab Nesbitt stained string vest..... had one tooth (it was neatly central though) a comb over hairstyle which you could fry fish fingers in..... tracksuit bottoms kept up with rope.... trainers which emitted a green cloud when he took them off..... he smelled good though..... well I have always loved the aroma of freshly cooked cabbage......... his fingernails were black but it was a fine contrast to the yellow skin....... and a hairy chest which I swear to this day had livestock lurking...... 

 

I could go on................. but I am all aroused and moist now..............be back in a while.......

 

:blink:

 

This is starting to sound like the punting version of

 

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Met her in a pub in Earls Court.   She had a couple of pints (pints!) and we went for a meal.  We had a bottle of wine and then went back to hers.  She was a little pissed.  She had a bad back and could barely move.  I massaged her back and she fell asleep.  I left.

 

But overall, it was nice to meet her as she was very interesting and she did say not to pay.

Edited by dick78

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Or the one where the girl was stunningly beautiful with a fantastic body and basically couldn't care less about me or anything else.  And I'm convinced that all the workers in the office opposite could see into the room as the blinds were fucked.  I left at half time and got a refund.

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Had a booking where the guy had a huge stool sitting between his bum cheeks, only discovered when I went down to give him oral :eek:

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Or the one where the girl, unlike in her pictures,  was actually so fat that I laughed when I first saw her as she looked ludicrous in her skimpy outfit.   And she lectured me incessantly about being positive in the face of adversity.  Needless to say, I left early.

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Hmm...I was about to have lunch, but strangely I'm not hungry anymore!! :wacko:

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Had a booking where the guy had a huge stool sitting between his bum cheeks, only discovered when I went down to give him oral :eek:

 

:eek:   Never mind you girl... he must have been in absolute agony.... poor guy!

 

http://sidoxia.files.wordpress.com/2011/03/stool.jpg

Edited by Lynn
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Met her in a pub in Earls Court.   She had a couple of pints (pints!) and we went for a meal.  We had a bottle of wine and then went back to hers.  She was a little pissed.  She had a bad back and could barely move.  I massaged her back and she fell asleep.  I left.

 

But overall, it was nice to meet her as she was very interesting and she did say not to pay.

 

That wasn't Sexy May, was it? I saw her once and enjoyed the experience enormously. But I remember an FR describing a scenario of this kind. I think she printed a rebuttal that wasn't a rebuttal but said, more or less, "Well, there you go, sometimes you fall asleep, sometimes you don't".

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