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Ebonypru

Bad Blow Job Better Than No Blow Job In A Marriage?

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I'm stating in a marriage as I can't believe any punter would settle for paying for a bad blow job.

 

And recounting the experience of a friend of mine who's fellation skills are so woeful that she was thrown off, literally, made me wonder.  For the men whose craving for a blow-job was the final straw to make them seek to punt, what if 'er indoors were willing to give it a go, but her skills really weren't up to much.  I speak as someone who doesn't have a dick so I can't tell how it feels. Is it just enough to have the warm comfort of the mouth, even without the accompanying trimmings (deep throat - never quite mastered that skill, sadly), tongue work, varying tempos, hand support, prostate massage, etc?  Or does it really have to meet a minimum standards or be deemed a waste of fucking time (technical term)?

 

I know with my nipples, some men suckle divinely.  But some put in a lack-lustre and pointless effort.  I'd rather the lack-lustre didn't waste either their time or mine as it isn't going to be contributing to my erotic GDP (Gross Domestic Product) and is time that could be best spent doing something else, or having something done to them, especially when they're paying.

 

But is a blow job different?  Is a bad blow job better than no blow job at all?

 

 

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The thing with Blow Jobs is that they Look better than they feel. Sex for a Man is more of a Visual thing whereas with a woman it's more sensual.

 

You would have to define what a Bad Blow Job is I suppose. 

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The blowjobs i have recieved feel pretty good...

In a relationship, well not had a bad blowjob to date (just cursed myself, i bet now the next ten ladies will drag their teeth down my....)

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Yes, bad would be better than not at all

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I'd say as the old joke says.

BJ is like pizza.

When it's good it's good.

When it's bad it's still good. :)

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The blowjobs i have recieved feel pretty good...

In a relationship, well not had a bad blowjob to date (just cursed myself, i bet now the next ten ladies will drag their teeth down my....)

LMAO!  But actually, teeth, used strategically, can add a certain edge to the proceedings.

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Then my friend must have been exceptionally bad to be thrown off, literally.  :(

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Until I visited the Dominican Republic many years ago I was unaware that there were varying degrees of blow-job quality.

 

 

I was being pestered by a WG on the sea front and the conversation went as follows

 

WG: blow-job mista

Me:  no

WG:  yes mista blow-job

Me:  piss off

WG:  blow-job yes  "real good one"

 

???   :lol:

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WL, GF or Wife: if she doesnt like to give the BJ: forget it.

 

Even if a wife or GF tries to please you, for your pleasure, but (clearly or subtle) doesnt like to do the BJ: dont! 

 

I cant take pleasure if my partner is straining.. this is why Mrs Ptr and me have done less then 3 BJ attempts in 24yrs of relationship, 22yrs of marriage. 

Partner has to enjoy herself and be totally comfortable, otherwise the whole sex-thing is not going well for me either.

Our Sexual encounters were top-notch for because we both knew how to please the other.

(until about 2004, that is, when her Sex drive just evaporated, and I turned to WLs in 2005)

 

And now being single-and-looking again, the bare fact of "does BJ" isnt on the selection criteria for a new partner.

But "Regular Sex, and Good at It" clearly is on that list.

And I suspect a reasonable BJ technique would come more or less automatically with that, but it is not a necessity.

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I like the cut of Ebonypru's jib.

 

Apart from questions like who we are, how did we get here, and are we alone in the universe, this question about bad blow jobs is right in there amongst the Europa league contenders in the table of BIG questions.

 

In a good blow job, the giver thinks your schlong as some kind of Holy Communion to be rewarded in heaven. It can't be achieved by going directly to putting the blessed sacrament in your mouth and swallowing. The hard yards of the readings from the bible, the sermon, the nicene creed, the Lord's prayer and the sharing of peace with your brethen have to come first. It's difficult to conceive a bad blow job as being down to bad skills. I think that any person wanting to give a good blow job, unless physically impaired, can read or ask or practice and end up being really quite good.

 

This is a warped opinion probably as the only bad blow jobs I've had were down to bad attitude. The 'birthday blow-job' was the worst of all. I'd rather she hadn't bothered for that one. Just in the mouth and up and down. You're not special because you are you, it's the anniversary of a day your mother remembers her hips getting split, is my view of birthday sex treats.

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Bongo it would be interesting if you posted some time when actually pissed. It could be a better read.

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Below Jobs to me are not that important to be honest! I've had one or two great ones, depending on how i was feeling on the day.I like blow jobs as part of a service as to get you ready for the next phase of action.I would even opt to have covered oral if it was going to save me money.Additionally when it came to GF's and Fiancé's I've had virtually no oral at all! From them!

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Bongo it would be interesting if you posted some time when actually pissed. It could be a better read.

You see I read that and thought "he must be pissed" lol

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This thread put me in mind of a scene in one of Russ Meyer's films (Common Law Cabin or was it Mudhoney?) in which one girl tells the character played by Charles Napier, "I give good head", to which he replies, "I ain't never had any bad head".

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...I know with my nipples, some men suckle divinely. But some put in a lack-lustre and pointless effort. I'd rather the lack-lustre didn't waste either their time or mine as it isn't going to be contributing to my erotic GDP...

But is a blow job different? Is a bad blow job better than no blow job at all?

Hello Pru! So good to see you back here! :D

No idea what the men think but I'm with you with the nipple sucking (and receiving oral). To me there is such a thing as bad oral, and I can only enjoy it for a few seconds while I'm still in that "Ooh, his head's there and I'm being licked, this could be good" headspace. But as soon as it gets to "Oh god, that hurts", "this is doing nothing for me" or "WTF is he doing!" I'd rather he just stop. I'd rather not receive it than receive it badly.

 

...Sex for a Man is more of a Visual thing whereas with a woman it's more sensual..

I'm not so sure that's accurate. For example, I'm very visually stimulated sexually, i.e. I get turned on or off depending on what I'm looking at, and I'm definitely a woman. I think the whole women prefer more sensual sex and aren't really visual idea is social conditioning rather than the truth. Anything else and we're "unladylike" or "sluts" and we can't have that can we.

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I'm not so sure that's accurate. For example, I'm very visually stimulated sexually, i.e. I get turned on or off depending on what I'm looking at, and I'm definitely a woman. I think the whole women prefer more sensual sex and aren't really visual idea is social conditioning rather than the truth. Anything else and we're "unladylike" or "sluts" and we can't have that can we.

 

Just going on my own personal observations I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule.

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I'd much rather have no BJ than a bad one, provided that other forms of enjoyment were on offer. Bad blow jobs range from the uncomfortable through to the ineffective and are surprisingly common, even from WGs who get a lot more practice than most girls. A well delivered BJ, deep, prolonged, minimal hand use and to completion is one of the great joys of life. However, I would much rather just shag than endure another toothy nibble of my bell end with her hand doing most of the work. This applies to relationships as well as paid sex.

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More than once I have met guys who actually declare that they really don't like blowjobs but I always end up persuading them to have one and they love it. I think there are a lot of guys out there who think they don't like them because they have been subjected to bad ones or worse... Rough ones. You can tell because they tense up and are even sometimes a bit jumpy till they realise that this one isn't going to be painful then you can visibly see their thighs relax and they start getting into it and stop giving the impression that one wrong move and they'll knee you in the head

Edited by Chloe Kisses
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More than once I have met guys who actually declare that they really don't like blowjobs but I always end up persuading them to have one and they love it. I think there are a lot of guys out there who think they don't like them because they have been subjected to bad ones or worse... Rough ones. You can tell because they tense up and are even sometimes a bit jumpy till they realise that this one isn't going to be painful then you can visibly see their thighs relax and they start getting into it and stop giving the impression that one wrong move and they'll knee you in the head

 

From the description you give, those guys sound repressed :huh:

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From the description you give, those guys sound repressed :huh:

It is odd, they have their thighs tensed up and crossing over as if they are going to push you away with their knee will they realise that Im not rough then they relax. Sometimes to be honest I feel like saying "you know what, sod it" and just not bothering to try as sometimes even guys who ask for a blow job are like that at first and I have had to tell people "listen, can you move your knee please" or "do you not want me too, I can stop if you like?" . Its very strange x

Edited by Chloe Kisses

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It is odd, they have their thighs tensed up and crossing over as if they are going to push you away with their knee will they realise that Im not rough then they relax. Sometimes to be honest I feel like saying "you know what, sod it" and just not bothering to try as sometimes even guys who ask for a blow job are like that at first and I have had to tell people "listen, can you move your knee please" or "do you not want me too, I can stop if you like?" . Its very strange x

 

Strange indeed :blink:  Speaking from experience, every BJ that I've ever had whether from punting or civvie life, my knees have never featured anywhere near the scene of the action  :) 

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They're always welcome, because, even when done unimaginatively, it's the idea of it that's so sexy: the woman with your cock in her mouth. The good ones are genuinely gratifying physically, but still not up there with the really great moments in punting for me.

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I'd rather have no blow job than a bad blow job. I recall the one and only time a previous partner gave me a blow job: when I came she gagged, ran to the bathroom and proceeded to retch and vomit! Maybe I expected too much, having been treated to some wonderful oral from partners before her, but a slap round the chops with a stinking kipper would have been preferable.

 

Imagine you're taken out for a meal by your beloved (even if you're paying her by the hour!) to what you think must surely be a good restaurant. You sit at the table in anticipation of what you think will be a good meal, only to find that a waiter with obvious personal hygiene issues splashes half the contents of a previously-opened, warm bottle of Château Pisspot in and around the dirty glass in front of you, then bangs down a plate of something unidentifiable before coughing all over it and you before turning around and farting in your face. Well, it's like that.

 

For me, sex is a luxury, a treat. I like to give and to receive pleasure, mutual affection, respect...all that nice fluffy stuff. If all a partner can manage is an unhappy, uncomfortable and profoundly depressing travesty of an act of love, than I'd sooner go without, thanks.

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As has been said I don't really get off on the feel of the blow job.  A good blow job is the visual effect.  Seeing the tongue lick up and down the shaft.  Licking it like a lollipop.  She looking at you is quite nice although quite a few of the wg I have seen don't want to look at you. One said she would laugh if she looked at me and needed to concentrate on the job in hand! 

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Only just remembered Judy Campbell having a lesson in how to give a blow-job:

 

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