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Punting Can Undermine You

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Have had a few rows with my SO recently and accused her of telling fibs about the facts of this or that. Then I think to myself ' how dare I use that tactic to win an argument ' when I have lied and hidden facts about my punting exploits for years. Not a good feeling . Anyone else felt the same way ?

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What is an SO?

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What is an SO?

 From my browsing of that other Escort loving forum called Mumsnet, I believe that SO is Significant Other...  Happy to be corrected!

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Have had a few rows with my SO recently and accused her of telling fibs about the facts of this or that. Then I think to myself ' how dare I use that tactic to win an argument ' when I have lied and hidden facts about my punting exploits for years. Not a good feeling . Anyone else felt the same way ?

 

No, never, might be different if I was getting plenty of action at home.  Although I rarely have rows with the wife. 

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Have had a few rows with my SO recently and accused her of telling fibs about the facts of this or that. Then I think to myself ' how dare I use that tactic to win an argument ' when I have lied and hidden facts about my punting exploits for years. Not a good feeling . Anyone else felt the same way ?

As I've just said in another post, the guilt complex still runs deep with many! :)

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 From my browsing of that other Escort loving forum called Mumsnet, I believe that SO is Significant Other...  Happy to be corrected!

Indeed it does.

 

Some of my best bedtime reading (after this site, of course) is the 'Relationships' section of Mumsnet, and it sometimes amuses me that even when the duplicitous bastard has run off with her best friend, she still refers to him as DH!

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The good thing is, you realise it's not a good thing to have double standards, so you'll change your behaviour towards her.

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Indeed it does.

 

Some of my best bedtime reading (after this site, of course) is the 'Relationships' section of Mumsnet, and it sometimes amuses me that even when the duplicitous bastard has run off with her best friend, she still refers to him as DH!

I think I am being thick - what is a DH ?

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Indeed it does.

 

Some of my best bedtime reading (after this site, of course) is the 'Relationships' section of Mumsnet, and it sometimes amuses me that even when the duplicitous bastard has run off with her best friend, she still refers to him as DH!

 

Yes it's an intriguing and sometimes horrific journey into the minds of what most people would describe as normal housewives if they passed them in the street.  It does make me wonder if the  only ladies who have a sensible and rational approach to sex and relationships are WG's

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I think I am being thick - what is a DH ?

 

Dear Hubby/Husband

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Yes it's an intriguing and sometimes horrific journey into the minds of what most people would describe as normal housewives if they passed them in the street.  It does make me wonder if the  only ladies who have a sensible and rational approach to sex and relationships are WG's

 

Haha, I wonder what percentage of the population would agree with that !

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What is an SO?

 

And I thought that you were a woman of the world ! ;)   

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As I've just said in another post, the guilt complex still runs deep with many! :)

 

No, if I wasnt accusing my partner of lieing,there's no problem here.

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No, never, might be different if I was getting plenty of action at home.  Although I rarely have rows with the wife. 

 

If a partner doesn't want to have sex anymore , then maybe the problem doesn't lie with her alone. Is it the disinterest in sex or disinterest with her partner that is the problem ?

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Please note, I require putting down if I ever start referring to someone as a DH or hubby. Yuck.  For equality purposes I also can't stand use of 'the wife' or missus. 

 

It wouldn't surprise me if it wasn't uncommon for men to get into rows with their wives post punting- It's really common when feeling guilty or trying to cover up you've been up to something you shouldn't be to be more distant or snappy. Kind of like a defence mechanism or a way (albeit subconsciously) to push the other person away. 

 

Thoughts gentlemen?

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It wouldn't surprise me if it wasn't uncommon for men to get into rows with their wives post punting- It's really common when feeling guilty or trying to cover up you've been up to something you shouldn't be to be more distant or snappy. Kind of like a defence mechanism or a way (albeit subconsciously) to push the other person away. 

 

Thoughts gentlemen?

I couldn't agree more, ML - manufacturing an argument for the sole purpose of relieving guilt and shame. Have you noticed any other characteristics which we use to hide shame? For instance, self-righteousness and pomposity. The main point of the thread though ....this whole problem is because we have bought into the idea of falling IN love, then getting married and then living with the other person in the same space for the next umpteen years or for ever (well, that's what's supposed to happen) It's against the way natural selection has worked to create us. 

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Ok, we're all arm chair psychologists. But I tend agree with ML. Definitely, think guilt subconsciously manifests itself as knee jerk, defensive aggression (whether passive or active). I know from my own personality this is probably true.

 

Guilt shows empathy, so it's a good sign. Lack of guilt shows a cold, less empathetic, possibly psychotic nature lol

 

:)

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Please note, I require putting down if I ever start referring to someone as a DH or hubby. Yuck.  For equality purposes I also can't stand use of 'the wife' or missus. 

 

It wouldn't surprise me if it wasn't uncommon for men to get into rows with their wives post punting- It's really common when feeling guilty or trying to cover up you've been up to something you shouldn't be to be more distant or snappy. Kind of like a defence mechanism or a way (albeit subconsciously) to push the other person away. 

 

Thoughts gentlemen?

 

 

Do you know, I think I am more 'charming' to my partner when I am in a period of punting. Maybe, as I am trying to connect with those ladies, it has a positive effect on me. When I am not punting , like now, I am more brittle and less patient or understanding.

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Dear Hubby/Husband

 

The problems start when you are refered to as STBXH

 

(Soon To Be Ex Husband)

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Haha, I wonder what percentage of the population would agree with that !

 

Not bloody many... that's for sure 

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OP, is your point not more than unfaithfulness, rather than punting as such, undermines? I wouldn't say anything about punting in and of itself undermines a person.

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OP, is your point not more than unfaithfulness, rather than punting as such, undermines? I wouldn't say anything about punting in and of itself undermines a person.

 

No,it's the lieing per se rather than the unfaithfulness, that undermines your right to accuse others of lieing. But one is lieing about the unfaithfulness.

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If a partner doesn't want to have sex anymore , then maybe the problem doesn't lie with her alone. Is it the disinterest in sex or disinterest with her partner that is the problem ?

 

I used to be convinced that it was disinterest in sex in general, but now I have become convinced that it is more often men that become lazy about maintaining their attractiveness so that their wives will want to have sex with them. In this regard, attitude and confidence are at least as important as physical attraction.

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If a partner doesn't want to have sex anymore , then maybe the problem doesn't lie with her alone. Is it the disinterest in sex or disinterest with her partner that is the problem ?

I would assume it would be to do with the other half not being as attractive to that person as they were when younger.

I remember my auntie saying not long ago how she went off sex with her other half as he had developed a middle aged belly and the sight of him naked put her off but she still loved him hahaha!

I think on both sides it can be down to attractiveness but other things aswell, could be that the wife doesn't find herself sexy or has low self esteem etc.

I'm young & bloody clueless when it comes to relationships but that's my two pence worth! X

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Re. Mumsnet - I deliberately avoid it, as I know I'd waste hours of my life on there! But I noticed a sharp change in one of my friends. She's a natural blonde, and slim with a great bum, which she always used to show off in tight jeans. She wasn't overly promiscuous, but dated a lot, had the odd one night stand, and had a long, serious affair with a married man. After getting married and having a child, she became Ms bleeding puritanical, and let in be known in no uncertain terms how she felt if e.g. I was seeing a married man. I understand your perspective will change when you're a wife and mother, but her hypocrisy was quite glaring.

 

The other thing with some of the Mumsnet gang - instead of bleating online, just give 'DH' a shag once a week and a blowjob on high days and holidays, and surely most problems would evaporate??

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