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Lohengrin

Bertrand Russell. Discuss.

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"The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution."  Thoughts?

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"The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution."  Thoughts?

 

My thoughts are... why don't you have any thoughts on it?

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"The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution."  Thoughts?

I d say that its something that is impossible to calculate 

Edited by Chloe Kisses

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I d say that its something that is impossible to calculate 

 

I guess that's why he said "probably".

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Well I don't think his point is based on a forensic statistical analysis.  It's more to equate sex within marriage as, more often than not, a form of unwelcome subjugation no more desired by the recipient of the act than it is by a paid sex worker.  In short, undesired sex happens in the marital home with the same regularity that it does in a brothel.  If you are inclined towards the statistics I'd say he's probably wrong, but not by much.  Thus, his point stands.

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I think it may have been true pre-pill, emancipation, women's lib etc., when many women were just expected to marry and raise children, staying at home to do so, and had little economic independence. But you'd hope these days it wasn't true!

 

Having never been married I can't really comment for myself, but I certainly enjoy most of the sex I have in my work.

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it seems women marry for many reasons and even these days sex is not at the top of the list by any means. There are many reasons why married men punt but I'm sure the trend is towards and un satisfying sexual relationship with their wife. Men often don't realise that these days the woman they married has often had an earlier and more sexually diverse experience than their men, despite what they May declare to their significant other, so when marriage comes along it is a package of things ( even now often finacial ) not lust that brings them down the Isle. Sex becomes a chore like anything else quite quickly as its security and emotional support that is more important. Men often become resentful as what they see as a one way trade and some what feel forced into buying sexual services. When women get passed reproductive stages often their libido goes from low to absolute zero. Un empathetic wives often have no comprehension of their partners frustration and see pestering for sex as the man just being vile and thoughtless as they assume the man should loose his libido too. Young Women it seems these days who have been passionate with other men with drama and excitement exhaust themselves and then settle. They will never feel the way they did with the guy that twisted thier head and who they completely gave in a physical way. They have done things with those men they would never do with their husbands. Men often get married for sex. for a regular guy its hard work to get free sex ( look at the night bus on a Saturday night at 2am.. Full of men who have failed again to get a girl) and they assume their wife, once their dream of marriage and security have been met along the propaganda lines of those ladies magazines, will fuck like Jenna Haze ad nausium. These are my personal observations of trends that I have seen over the years and I'm certain they don't reflect all experiences of everyone and aren't intended to.

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Bertrand Russel died like half a century ago, so this might have been true when he said it but not today

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he was obviously shagging the wrong women

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You should read Russell's autobiog

 

he fucks his way through half the poshy totty in cambridge

 

well not quite but he was a highly sexed philosopher

 

in his times - most women probably married from a small pool of men - as wars killed many and left them with not much choice - so tasty young girls were having to marry geriatrics

 

it was the time to be a man, just after the wars - and he saw plenty of that

 

put into that context - but now women marry for love so not true anymore

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For my generation, I'm 62, I imagine there was a lot of unwanted pre marriage sex for women, as many men found out the days, weeks and years after the wedding day.

Rationing was brought in, unless the lady in question wanted to start a family, then you were lucky if you had the foundations and strength left to build an new erection, only to find the new building had no purpose.

Life can be sooooooooo frustrating at times.

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One of the great unspoken truths is that most women are as crap as sex ss men. They think turning up is the end of their responsibility and whine at the man for lack of his skill.

In my marriage my wife was an infrequent and indifferent lover. And it wrecked me and our marriage. But tearful wives talking of being taken advantage of is much more interesting than boring husbands banging on about lack of sex. No phd candidates post asking for examples of desperately frustrated husbands.

T

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The statement in the post below is true.

Edited by Joe Diddley
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The statement in the post above is false.

Edited by Joe Diddley
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"The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution."  Thoughts?

..I am a relatively new member to PN but have to say I signed up because I was interested in leads, recommendations and make a contribution from to time - but I never imagined I'd be discussing a quote from Bertrand Russell framed rather like one of my undergraduate essay questions (yes I studied philosophy for my many sins).....but hey that's the fun about being on PN - always something interesting to discuss. 

 

Bertrand wasn't that successful at marriage and wasn't a great fan of monogamy - he was married 4 times, as someone rightly pointed out shagged his way through a lot of posh totty in Cambridge and if I am not mistaken cuckolded much to his anguish and chagrin the late and very great George Bernard Shaw......

 

I think the premise of the statement is misguided though because prostituted sex isn't undesired by either party - the punter desires it and so does the WG - married sex well who can possibly know what goes on in any marriage sex wise and clearly Bertrand must have had a fair degree of undesired sex in that august institution - but at least he tried it four times! :)

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Love old Bert. This quote:

 

"Compliment a woman on her looks unless she is very beautiful or very plain."

 

He knew a thing or two.

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The statement in the post above is false.

I forgot - did he ever solve that one

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I don't believe fidelity is natural for gentlemen OR ladies. 

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