Dave38

In A Relationship But Tempted To Punt

60 posts in this topic

Hi All,

First timer poster here and after advice / views .... . I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and in the main life is good - nice house, go on nice holidays.....etc. Our sex life is good and I love her. You may doubt this when I say that I am feeling sorely tempted to see an escort. I've become addicted to looking at the websites of the london agencies and all I can say is WOW ! Some of those girls are incredible. I'm no oil painting so the thought of seeing one of those stunners is going round and round in my head.

Basically the only thing that is stopping me frankly is the guilt of "cheating" - anyone experienced similar ? If so , any advice ?

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Personally I wouldn't start if I was in your position, I'm sure others will disagree with that - but only you can make that choice.

One thing I would say is consider what the consequences would be should you get found out, and make sure you're prepared to live with them. Don't automatically assume you won't get caught out.

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It would be wrong of anyone here to encourage a punting virgin to visit an escort.

 

Wrestle with your concience and make your decision.

 

That is what the rest of the guys do.

 

(I do hope you are genuine)

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Without realising sounds like there is something missing from your relationship as if you really did love her you wouldn't think about doing this

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Hi All,

First timer poster here and after advice / views .... . I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and in the main life is good - nice house, go on nice holidays.....etc. Our sex life is good and I love her. You may doubt this when I say that I am feeling sorely tempted to see an escort. I've become addicted to looking at the websites of the london agencies and all I can say is WOW ! Some of those girls are incredible. I'm no oil painting so the thought of seeing one of those stunners is going round and round in my head.

Basically the only thing that is stopping me frankly is the guilt of "cheating" - anyone experienced similar ? If so , any advice ?

 

 

You seem to have it all,  'nice house, go on nice holidays.....etc. Our sex life is good and I love her.'    and yet you are

looking for something more?  Might be an idea to identify what is making you want to dip your toes?

 

From what I've read of the guyz here punting is an addicitive habit and one you may not really be ready for?

 

Step back, put things into perspective and you might just see things differently?   then again you may not in which

case take the time to read the forums and see how the land lies and go from there.

 

Whatever you decide I hope it's right for you.

Edited by EnjoyEmily
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Guilt is a strange one and totally individual.

For first spell i was riddled with it, foe both the girls and my partner. This time round i haven't felt an ounce of guilt either way.

And as emily said, it can become very addictive and a slippery slope for some. If you're genuinely happy in your relationship i would advise not to start seeing escorts and try to find something else to fill the void.

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Dave don't do it, yes don't those pictures on the agency sites look amazing, well Dave they are all Photoshopped to fuck and not just their faces, it depends on exactly which sites your looking at but most are simply honeytraps aimed at those visiting London, if your lucky you might meet someone who vaguely resembles the photos but who probably won't do any of the services advertised. Now think about the implications for your relationship, your going to have to lie to your partner again and again and of course there's always the possibility that you might just bring home a little present for her in the form of an STD, try talking your way out of that one. Hope that answers your question.

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Hi All,

First timer poster here and after advice / views .... . I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and in the main life is good - nice house, go on nice holidays.....etc. Our sex life is good and I love her. You may doubt this when I say that I am feeling sorely tempted to see an escort. I've become addicted to looking at the websites of the london agencies and all I can say is WOW ! Some of those girls are incredible. I'm no oil painting so the thought of seeing one of those stunners is going round and round in my head.

Basically the only thing that is stopping me frankly is the guilt of "cheating" - anyone experienced similar ? If so , any advice ?

I will say don't.  I only have the second part of your home life. While I had both no way would I have seen escorts. As to the web site pictures, yes there are some very attractive girls, not quite as in the photos, but it's still a dream and you have reality. It's a lot to put at risk.

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If you have a genuine loving relationship with a woman who turns you on and you feel a deep connection with don't do it. Yes those women have amazing looking bodies. But they are not yours to cuddle up with at the end of the day and wake up with in the morning. Unless you are paying the going rate. More than likely the pics are photo shopped any way and they look just like your average girl on the street in her underwear. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, so to speak.

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A fellow needs to know where and when to go see a wg, the pub bike, an old flame or a successful fling and such. But don't let it rule your life, then it is a vice.

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Just dont do it OP. You sound like you have a good thing going. Why risk that? Lots of guys on here are married and see us ladies but usually because they are seriously lacking attention in the bedroom department. 

 

Of course its up to you but it sounds like you are only considering it because of what you have come across online. 

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Are you smart enough to not be caught out or give yourself away - lots of little things can do it. If you have any doubts, then you need to think about you might be risking if your girlfriend did find out. Is seeing an escort worth the risk...?

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Hi All,

First timer poster here and after advice / views .... . I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and in the main life is good - nice house, go on nice holidays.....etc. Our sex life is good and I love her. You may doubt this when I say that I am feeling sorely tempted to see an escort. I've become addicted to looking at the websites of the london agencies and all I can say is WOW ! Some of those girls are incredible. I'm no oil painting so the thought of seeing one of those stunners is going round and round in my head.

Basically the only thing that is stopping me frankly is the guilt of "cheating" - anyone experienced similar ? If so , any advice ?

it's not all it's cracked up to be

you could find a beautiful escort - most dont look as good as the pics

anyway if you really love your g/f and have good sex you have no good reason to punt

once you have cheated - even if it is just the once - something dies - it's up to you - is it worth it

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Beginning to see that old cartoon, where there is a red devil in one ear and a white angel in the other ear.

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All good advice, I suppose, and yet...

Sometimes if an itch won't go away, then it's better to scratch it. Like Blake saying "sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires". Because those desires will go on working away inside you until your imagination has become putrid with furtive lust. Much better to get it out of your system.

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Here's another angle FWIW :

 

If it's just wanting to see an escort (because they look good etc)  I'd probably say don't.

If it's wanting to have sex with someone different to your normal partner i.e. escort OR non-escort  then an escort is a better option than

having an affair which can get messy and expensive in both emotional and financial terms.

 

You've got to weigh the options carefully.

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Here's another angle FWIW :

 

If it's just wanting to see an escort (because they look good etc)  I'd probably say don't.

If it's wanting to have sex with someone different to your normal partner i.e. escort OR non-escort  then an escort is a better option than

having an affair which can get messy and expensive in both emotional and financial terms.

 

You've got to weigh the options carefully.

but i like seeing escorts cos they are escorts. the nortiness of punting adds frisson for me.

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Not for me to say.

 

I would just quote one phrase of your own - the guilt of cheating.

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All good advice, I suppose, and yet...

Sometimes if an itch won't go away, then it's better to scratch it. Like Blake saying "sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires". Because those desires will go on working away inside you until your imagination has become putrid with furtive lust. Much better to get it out of your system.

I think the OP will end up going ahead.  The way I read the post that's already his decision but he wants to be given the all clear from a third party.

 

Will guilt eat at him, or will an unfulfilled desire eat at him?  Which will win?

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but i like seeing escorts cos they are escorts. the nortiness of punting adds frisson for me.

 

Eh, you're a punter's punter, Cov.

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There are as many reasons we punt as there are punters. A lot of the punters here who are in relationships punt because there is something wrong at home. And a lot punt because there is nothing wrong at home but they love the  joy of sex with other women. The comments above seem to be mainly from those who had something wrong at home and are puzzled as to why Dave should join us. Think about that Dave and ponder what you are throwing away if you punt.

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All good advice, I suppose, and yet...

Sometimes if an itch won't go away, then it's better to scratch it. Like Blake saying "sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires". Because those desires will go on working away inside you until your imagination has become putrid with furtive lust. Much better to get it out of your system.

On the flip side there's an argument that if you ignore the itch for long enough it'll go away..

I know it's a sweeping generalisation to say once a punter always a punter, but as someone who dipped a toe into the punting world to scratch an itch - ie have sex again after a long period of abstinence just to see what it was like - it isn't easy to slow down, let alone give up!

For what it's worth (not much), IMO the OP should give serious consideration to what he has, what he wants and thinks he'll gain from punting, and what he has to lose before taking the plunge.

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If you feel guilty about cheating on her then do not do it. If you want to shag other women. Be honest to her and to yourself dump her and go and shag other women.

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The grass often looks greener just across the bridge.

 

However when you get there, it isn't, infact it is often quite barren.

 

But when you turn around to re-cross the bridge you fine that your original grass has been poisoned.

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If the Op is genuine it would be nice to get a reaction by now since at least 20 pieces of advice have been offered!

 

Mine is just in the form of a question: would your partner have any interest in trying swinging, even just soft swinging? Then you could both have some fun without guilt. I'd think you might see some lovely looking ladies at these parties. 

 

Casually quoting a Proverb from Hell is impressive, Colonel!   Blake also says:  If the fool would persist in his folly he would become wise.  But that is the voice of the Devil again...

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