sexymaylondon

Crippled Tarts

46 posts in this topic

Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

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Well I once had a lady who had been in a fight a day or two earlier.

She had a blackeye and a sore knee.

Halfway through doggy she asked if we could change as her knee was hurting too much, I didnt mind although if I'd known about her injuries previous to the booking I probably would have chosen someone else.

I never actually went back to her but not because of the sore knee thing but we just didnt "click" :D

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

Sounds reasonable to me May ! :D no need to tie and tease you. neck brace-- would that affect deep- throating ? No screaming in pain now :D Crippled tart-- is that a type of scottish new year pie baked by grandma' ?

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The other Tiny Tim, may or may not have given blowjobs, but was reputedly a wizard with his tongue, or so his ex-wife said.

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Crippled tarts offering a discount? Personally I haven't got a clue - ask Paul McCartney not so sure he got a discount!!!:D

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I had people come see me with my crippled leg - sorry can't go on top, doggy is ok but for not too long, sure no bother.

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I had people come see me with my crippled leg - sorry can't go on top, doggy is ok but for not too long, sure no bother.

you see, you've got it babe !! its all about attitude :D

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

Quite the opposite a crippled tart should charge extra for the novelty. It's not every day you can say you've shagged a crippled tart. The non-crippled ones, however, are a dime a dozen.

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

Sweetheart, if it was you, I'd happily pay an injury surcharge and applaud you for devotion to your whorely duties! :D

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i broke my ankle a couple of years back and was back at work by the end of the week

all my regs were told i was in plaster but if anything it made me more popular,was busier than ever.

the only thing i wasn't comfortable doing was missionary cause i was worried about clocking them on the head with the plaster.

thankfully i was working in a parlor at the time so didn't have to go up and down the stairs to answer the door lol.was told it was quite a novelty to be shown upstairs and have me ready and waiting for them

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

In all seriousness i couldnt do it, whatever the rights and wrongs i would mentally think i am taking advantage. I wish you a speedy recovery.:D

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And Lou4fun gets shit for touting?

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And Lou4fun gets shit for touting?

Nope, there is a legal obligation to provide special facilities for the disabled.

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In all seriousness i couldnt do it, whatever the rights and wrongs i would mentally think i am taking advantage. I wish you a speedy recovery.:D

Yes to the above (and the good wishes) but for me it would be ok only if I knew the lady fairly well.

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

I would be very happy to shag you, Even happier with a discount

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And Lou4fun gets shit for touting?

Honesty here. I am deathly bored iup here in my non-shag flat. I do, however, have access to salt and sauce haggis suppers a mere stumble though powder snow away.

Ladies on here. Should we burp, or talk, god preserve us, we must be touting if no apparent tits out discerned....sneaky animals, us. We can't really have an opinion, can we? If we do, and appear appealing...Never mind the fact that I'm announcing I'm lopsided for at least a month. Clearly...

At least on here people are vaguely focussed on why they need to bonk. What confuses me, the people still confused and upset why they paid for it in the first place. And take it out on us ladies - too expensive, too ugly, too...

not willing to listen to shit that your psychologist should.

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Gents: if a WG you had your eye on for a bit who then declared her wank hand less than it was, but the rest was still working and bendy...

...let's postulate further. She's in a neck brace (not me, just an unwieldy sling), but could still give a good blowjob...broken wrist say, or sprained knee etc, etc...

Wouuld you expect a discount? Rather say no, and wait for the theoretical peak performance? Or would you feel rather weird and shitlike, demanding sex off a cripple?

Tiny Tim, as far as I'm aware, never offered blow jobs.

Last week my left arm was in a sling and my foot was bandaged because a horse fell on me, but l still managed to give a first class wank and managed to tickle his balls with a long feather that hung from my teeth.

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Last week my left arm was in a sling and my foot was bandaged because a horse fell on me, but l still managed to give a first class wank and managed to tickle his balls with a long feather that hung from my teeth.

I hope the horse was OK :D

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Originally Posted by ladyofthemansion View Post

Last week my left arm was in a sling and my foot was bandaged because a horse fell on me, but l still managed to give a first class wank and managed to tickle his balls with a long feather that hung from my teeth.

I hope the horse was OK :D

Never mind was he OK, did he enjoy the wank and tickling?

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I hope the horse was OK :D

It has to be. I need it for my tours.

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It has to be. I need it for my tours.

Why do you need a horse for your tours ? :D

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Originally Posted by ladyofthemansion View Post

Last week my left arm was in a sling and my foot was bandaged because a horse fell on me, but l still managed to give a first class wank and managed to tickle his balls with a long feather that hung from my teeth.

Never mind was he OK, did he enjoy the wank and tickling?

Lol. I have phrased it wrong. No. I didn't wank the horse. Holy smoke. :D

I am not Rebecca Loos.

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Why do you need a horse for your tours ? :D

A better way to travel from city to city. Much greener. :D

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A better way to travel from city to city. Much greener. :D

Nice to know someone is putting the environment first, good on you!

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Nice to know someone is putting the environment first, good on you!

The sat nav does run out of battery power though as I cant plug it in but I stop at the service stations to charge it.

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