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Averageguy

Reasons for punting

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Hi, 

I just wondered what guys reasons were for punting.  My story is that i  had no luck with women. I was and still am invisible to women.  Its not looks or physique,  it's personality and charisma. 

Some guys have lots of confidence and charisma and this is the key with women. 

So it's necessity really. It would rather not have to but its just a reality for me. 

I would not want to be married though..  I've heard too many horror stories about guys marriages! 

I also tried craigslist for sex,  but i think it is a waste of time.  It was just loads of working girls looking for business.  Some women who wanted a cash reward.  And gay guys. 

Are there any other ways of getting sex without paying? 

 

Cheers. 

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5 hours ago, Averageguy said:

Hi, 

I just wondered what guys reasons were for punting.  My story is that i  had no luck with women. I was and still am invisible to women.  Its not looks or physique,  it's personality and charisma. 

Some guys have lots of confidence and charisma and this is the key with women. 

Well, you've said the answer yourself... what have you done to attempt to improve your confidence, or have you tried addressing the issues as to why you're not confident?

For example, you mentioned looks or physique, have you tried going to the gym to improve your physique? A good body is not the be-all and end-all, but having one, in itself, can be a massive confidence boost... especially if it's something you've had to work for (blood, sweat and tears... literally). If that's not your bag, then do you have any hobbies? You could join an evening class, learn a new skill, take up a sport, or even do some charity work... It'll give you something to do so you're not at home thinking "Woe is me" ,acquiring  a new skill will also give you confidence (in the same way as working out in a gym) especially when you notice you're getting good at it. Moreover, the nature of the hobby is likely to naturally open more opportunities to meet / interact with women & the hobby will provide something in common and /or a talking point.

It's up to you, but if you pick a physical activity, as well as the obvious health / fitness benefits, exercise also releases endorphins (basically "feel-good" hormones)... so you'll like yourself more anyway.

 

5 hours ago, Averageguy said:

 

Are there any other ways of getting sex without paying? 

All you have to remember is the golden rule:- You don't ask, you don't get.

It's that old cliché, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Fair enough, you say you're invisible to women, but do you actually ever approach women or let them know you're interested? Do you go to things like pubs / clubs or sit at home feeling sorry for yourself? Simply by being in a pub / club, you've already significantly improved your chances of meeting someone. On the other hand, do you have profiles on sites like match.com, plenty of fish etc.? Having said that, those sites are probably more for looking for a boyfriend / girlfriend... but there are sites like ** that are more focused on sex... However, I think the sex sites are heavily favoured towards women. In either case, I think the key to success is having a shit-hot profile. I would strongly suggest you get one / some of the female posters here to critique your profile.

P.S. Also learn how to dance. I strongly believe that anyone (who is able bodied) can double their sex-appeal, just by having a sense of rhythm and can move to a beat. There's a reason artists like Usher, Beyoncé, Justin Timberlake etc. have that added 'je ne sais quoi' that other artists don't have

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Hi,  thanks for your reply. 

I have aspergers and was only diagnosed at 35. I had no treatment in my formative years so it turns out that my experiences with regards to relationships is typical for aspergers sufferers. 

It is something you can cope with to a certain extent with coping techniques but despite this,  many people can still see through the techniques.  I have things I cannot control like being unable to judge what amount of eye contact to have with people.  The result is that I will often 'stare'  at some people and 'blank' others unintentionally. So people just see you as weird. 

But,  it is what it is :)

Many people have worse problems. 

I started punting at 18 because I saw plenty other guys having girlfriends and one night stands and my attempts at engaging with girls fell flat. 

Cheers. 

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A small act of rebellion to a very controlling wife.  Somehow when I am being harried and nagged from pillar to post the thought that I was balls deep in someone half her age earlier in the week makes it easier to cope with!  Oh and I like the thrill of some lovely women and exciting exploits!

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One of the easiest ways to meet people, who otherwise would have walked by without even noticing you, is to have a nice friendly, well-behaved dog! It amazes me how many people stop and tell me how handsome he is, what is his breed, etc., - once conversation starts, you don't have to move on to "what about a bonk, then?" immediately, but it is on the way already!

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1 hour ago, Irgendeiner said:

One of the easiest ways to meet people, who otherwise would have walked by without even noticing you, is to have a nice friendly, well-behaved dog! It amazes me how many people stop and tell me how handsome he is, what is his breed, etc., - once conversation starts, you don't have to move on to "what about a bonk, then?" immediately, but it is on the way already!

And sometimes the dogs themselves can turn the conversation in that direction. While walking mine I sometimes meet a girl in her twenties with a fairly small bitch who always rolls over when she sees mine and allows him to lick her out. So there we are, holding our dogs by the lead, making polite conversation, and I'm certainly thinking, but I'd give a penny or two to know what's going through her mind.

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11 hours ago, Averageguy said:

 

It is something you can cope with to a certain extent with coping techniques but despite this,  many people can still see through the techniques.  I have things I cannot control like being unable to judge what amount of eye contact to have with people.  The result is that I will often 'stare'  at some people and 'blank' others unintentionally. So people just see you as weird. 

But,  it is what it is :)

Hi,

I can't claim to be an expert on Asperger's Syndrome, so I don't know what it's like to live with; however, I do know a technique that can help with the whole psycho staring bit:-

When talking to someone, form a triangle between their eyes and their mouth... and use each of these as a focal point. When talking, momentarily shift your focus between these three points; this allows you to maintain a good degree of facial contact, without staring at them. Some people find it difficult looking into peoples eyes... if so, you can use her eyebrows or glasses frame instead (she won't notice the difference)

The other thing to try is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, this involves taking baby steps out of your comfort zone. This is proven technique for beating phobias

7 hours ago, Colonel Bonkers said:

And sometimes the dogs themselves can turn the conversation in that direction. While walking mine I sometimes meet a girl in her twenties with a fairly small bitch who always rolls over when she sees mine and allows him to lick her out. So there we are, holding our dogs by the lead, making polite conversation, and I'm certainly thinking, but I'd give a penny or two to know what's going through her mind.

Indeed Colonel indeed, ;) 

Lots of Freudian innuendos there ... as long as you don't *ahem*  "show" your interest, it's all good I guess... restraining orders aren't really the best conversation starters :lol::P:wacko:

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I love women....both in this and the real world and been fortunate enough to indulge in the two worlds until my hearts content....

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I also turned to punting because I had no luck with women and 20 years ago being a Tamil short male was difficult. Unfortunately you will always have  to pay in some way to get sex unless you are the fortunate few. If you do get a date there is the cost of clothes, haircut, gift, taxi, restaurant, etc. After all that the sex isn't guaranteed.

Also if you go down the gym route, sports, dance etc.  make sure you're doing it because you want to. If you're not women can smell a fake a mile off.

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4 hours ago, met012 said:

I also turned to punting because I had no luck with women and 20 years ago being a Tamil short male was difficult. Unfortunately you will always have  to pay in some way to get sex unless you are the fortunate few. If you do get a date there is the cost of clothes, haircut, gift, taxi, restaurant, etc. After all that the sex isn't guaranteed.

Also if you go down the gym route, sports, dance etc.  make sure you're doing it because you want to. If you're not women can smell a fake a mile off.

You should also metion the route of becoming rich and successful and that can be achieved whatever your stature or race.

Of course knowing women are only attacted to you for your money is not a lot different to buying sex directly.

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That's a bit harsh...the words "love" and "enjoyment" are just two that summarise many ladies feelings...it's not always about the big fat bulge in your pocket of the wallet kind...

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Very happily married for more than 35 years but the sex stopped more than 20 years ago.

Had been introduced to punting at 18 when a school mate of mine was taken to a Soho brothel by his father for his birthday & asked could he bring a friend!

Been addicted ever since & though I have been in relationships,i have always wanted more than monogamy so have had affairs & paid sex throughout my adult life.

Still get just as excited at the prospect of meeting a new lady today as before & still looking for new ladies all the time to have fun with.

I have had several long term regulars over the years but they have all retired or moved on now.Saw one lady for nearly 15 years & a couple of others for more than 5 years .

 

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17 hours ago, robert49 said:

You should also metion the route of becoming rich and successful and that can be achieved whatever your stature or race.

Of course knowing women are only attacted to you for your money is not a lot different to buying sex directly.

 

2 hours ago, Hero said:

That's a bit harsh...the words "love" and "enjoyment" are just two that summarise many ladies feelings...it's not always about the big fat bulge in your pocket of the wallet kind...

The OP has to accept the fact that young attractive women are hit on a daily basis when they go out or on social websites. For them its a case of sorting though the chaff since all they need is that one black dress for sex.

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For me it's just the variety of female. I personally don't think it's natural to commit to one human being...whether it be teens, milfs, black girls, bbw's, Asians, whatever ....it's the pure variety of experiences there is to be had out there. As far as I am concerned females serve one purpose in life....to pleasure my penis...and that's basically what's it's all about.

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2 hours ago, spunkie74 said:

For me it's just the variety of female. I personally don't think it's natural to commit to one human being...whether it be teens, milfs, black girls, bbw's, Asians, whatever ....it's the pure variety of experiences there is to be had out there. As far as I am concerned females serve one purpose in life....to pleasure my penis...and that's basically what's it's all about.

Smooth... Very smooth :)

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7 hours ago, spunkie74 said:

For me it's just the variety of female. I personally don't think it's natural to commit to one human being...whether it be teens, milfs, black girls, bbw's, Asians, whatever ....it's the pure variety of experiences there is to be had out there. As far as I am concerned females serve one purpose in life....to pleasure my penis...and that's basically what's it's all about.

I find they're often quite good at ironing too.

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3 hours ago, Colonel Bonkers said:

I find they're often quite good at ironing too.

....and cooking, and cleaning, and.............

 

 

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Spunkie, my old china, even I have sensory organs besides my cock.

What about laughing at our jokes, telling us we're fabulous in bed, snogging our faces off, holding our heads firmly in place and going ooh ooh aah aah then pushing our heads away?

We're complicated sensitive creatures, us men.

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18 hours ago, spunkie74 said:

For me it's just the variety of female. I personally don't think it's natural to commit to one human being...whether it be teens, milfs, black girls, bbw's, Asians, whatever ....it's the pure variety of experiences there is to be had out there. As far as I am concerned females serve one purpose in life....to pleasure my penis...and that's basically what's it's all about.

In the context of punting (Punternet - geddit?) then I'm 100% with every word.

But then, I am very odd - I'm not at all interested in dinner dates, overnights, etc. In fact, I'm not even bothered whether or not the girl has a grasp of English, as long as she understands sign language and is responsive.

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On ‎18‎/‎07‎/‎2016 at 4:17 PM, met012 said:

Also if you go down the gym route, sports, dance etc.  make sure you're doing it because you want to. If you're not women can smell a fake a mile off.

I agree with you to an extent... that applies more to the non-physical activities.

However, with the gym, sports dance etc. there are the obvious health / fitness benefits... not to mention that after a good bout of exercise your body releases endorphins (basically feel-good hormones) so you feel better about yourself anyway.

Just to clarify, when I suggested going to the gym, it was purely about improving your physique and the subsequent self-confidence you get from a) having a good body that you're proud of and b ) when you see your hard work finally paying off.

Please do NOT approach women at the gym... the gym is not a nightclub and you'll look like a creep / wierdo :ph34r::(:unsure:

On ‎18‎/‎07‎/‎2016 at 8:33 PM, robert49 said:

You should also mention the route of becoming rich and successful and that can be achieved whatever your stature or race.

True... but unless you either win the lottery or rob a bank, it takes a great deal of time & effort to become rich and successful; several years in most cases. What do you do for nookie when you're on the road to being rich and successful?

On ‎18‎/‎07‎/‎2016 at 8:33 PM, robert49 said:

Of course knowing women are only attracted to you for your money is not a lot different to buying sex directly.

I disagree, I think it's completely different to buying sex.

The way I see it, there will be a sense of exclusivity when you're rich. The kind of girls who go for the rich girls (commonly known as Gold-diggers) won't go near a guy who earns less than 'X' amount, or  a bank balance less than 'Y'; also, while they may not have to be good looking in the conventional sense, they will still need to be groomed and well presented. Escorts, on the other hand, have their services open to anyone who can stump up the £150/ hour fee (or whatever their rates are)... this includes Bob who spends his life sweeping the streets but saves up once a year for a birthday treat.

9 hours ago, exerter said:

Spunkie, my old china, even I have sensory organs besides my cock.

What about laughing at our jokes, telling us we're fabulous in bed, snogging our faces off, holding our heads firmly in place and going ooh ooh aah aah then pushing our heads away?

We're complicated sensitive creatures, us men.

 

4 hours ago, Siamese Tomcat said:

In the context of punting (Punternet - geddit?) then I'm 100% with every word.

But then, I am very odd - I'm not at all interested in dinner dates, overnights, etc. In fact, I'm not even bothered whether or not the girl has a grasp of English, as long as she understands sign language and is responsive.

A phrase involving horses and courses springs to mind here.

I think the true definition of an escort (in the broader sense) is someone you're paying to be your ideal companion for whatever time period you've paid them for. Some people like the wining and dining and other things that builds up to sex, others only care about the mechanics of the sex act(s)... Also, don't forget there are those who book escorts and never have sex with them.

10 hours ago, exerter said:

...holding our heads firmly in place and going ooh ooh aah aah then pushing our heads away?

Escorts also do monkey impressions these days? Wonders never cease. :lol::lol::lol:

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For me personally I started because no girl has ever been even remotely interested in me, and this is the only way for me to have sex..

I was in my mid-20's roughly when I finally had enough of seeing and hearing about every single person I know getting laid and putting it around all the time, so finally decided to see an escort. Since then, my situation hasn't changed, women don't want to know, and even online where people haven't met me in person, I get comments back about being a fattie and ugly etc, so my only option for female intimate (or any physical) contact is to pay them..

The catch 22 is because ive got a poorly paid job, I can't afford much, and there seems to be very few girls around in my price bracket, and even less who are reliable!

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1 hour ago, JohnSheppard said:

For me personally I started because no girl has ever been even remotely interested in me, and this is the only way for me to have sex..

I was in my mid-20's roughly when I finally had enough of seeing and hearing about every single person I know getting laid and putting it around all the time, so finally decided to see an escort. Since then, my situation hasn't changed, women don't want to know, and even online where people haven't met me in person, I get comments back about being a fattie and ugly etc, so my only option for female intimate (or any physical) contact is to pay them..

The catch 22 is because ive got a poorly paid job, I can't afford much, and there seems to be very few girls around in my price bracket, and even less who are reliable!

Well what are you going to do about it? Are you happy to stay in this rut or do you want to do something about it?

If it's the latter, I would suggest you re-read some of my earlier posts about getting hobbies etc. to give you something else to focus on. In particular, you may want to pay attention to the ones about getting fit. I don't know what you look like, but I do know that you anyone can improve their appearance by doing regular exercise. It may seem hard but all you need to do is find the right starting point for you. Also as I said previously, exercise releases endorphins, so in addition to the fitness benefits, you'll feel better about yourself. You don't have to turn into an Olympic athlete, but just making a small commitment to do a moderate amount of exercise would do wonder for you IMHO.

 

 

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On 11/07/2016 at 10:44 AM, Averageguy said:

So people just see you as weird. 

But,  it is what it is :)

Many people have worse problems.

Averageguy, I assure I'm probably seen as weirder than you on a daily basis, and I'm good with that.  In fact, I challenge you to a dual of ultimate weirdness! So there!  :P

BUT!  If you don't believe me, please do listen to @DirtyGit, because:

1:  He seems like a genuinely helpful guy

and

2.  I've used cognitive behavioural therapy on a daily basis for the past ten years to keep me (semi) sane, so it's definitely worth a go.  If you haven't discussed it with your GP, please do give it a go and ask to be referred for CBT counselling as I swear it will change your life, if only in a small but very helpful way.  xx

 

On 11/07/2016 at 11:06 PM, DirtyGit said:

Hi,

I can't claim to be an expert on Asperger's Syndrome, so I don't know what it's like to live with; however, I do know a technique that can help with the whole psycho staring bit:-

When talking to someone, form a triangle between their eyes and their mouth... and use each of these as a focal point. When talking, momentarily shift your focus between these three points; this allows you to maintain a good degree of facial contact, without staring at them. Some people find it difficult looking into peoples eyes... if so, you can use her eyebrows or glasses frame instead (she won't notice the difference)

The other thing to try is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, this involves taking baby steps out of your comfort zone. This is proven technique for beating phobias

Indeed Colonel indeed, ;) 

Lots of Freudian innuendos there ... as long as you don't *ahem*  "show" your interest, it's all good I guess... restraining orders aren't really the best conversation starters :lol::P:wacko:

 

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On 11 July 2016 at 7:18 PM, Beast said:

A small act of rebellion to a very controlling wife.  Somehow when I am being harried and nagged from pillar to post the thought that I was balls deep in someone half her age earlier in the week makes it easier to cope with!  Oh and I like the thrill of some lovely women and exciting exploits!

When I was married, it was in part very much this. She'd be calling me all names under the sun acting entitled and had her hand in my wallet while not doing a days work herself. When she kicked off and I was just getting verbally abused I kept my calm by knowing I'd be with a sexy young woman very very soon. Made a good release valve and revenge all in one.

Also the variety of women and experiences you can never get in civvie street.

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1 hour ago, uncle travelling matt said:

When I was married, it was in part very much this. She'd be calling me all names under the sun acting entitled and had her hand in my wallet while not doing a days work herself. When she kicked off and I was just getting verbally abused I kept my calm by knowing I'd be with a sexy young woman very very soon. Made a good release valve and revenge all in one.

Also the variety of women and experiences you can never get in civvie street.

What can I say?  We're that naughty glue that keeps marriages together.  B)

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