Lamorak

Punting Emotions

136 posts in this topic

Two weeks ago my wife was away for the week visiting family and I took Monday off work and had a 90 minute punt and took Friday off for a 2 hour punt. A blond on Monday and a Brunette on Friday, absolutely wonderful with no feelings of guilt etc.

Yesterday, with my wife back, its back to deception and lies, getting up and getting ready to go to work, setting of from home with my wife kissing me goodbye and saying take care and its your favourite meal for dinner tonight.

So I drive away from home feeling guilty and a right bastard, as instead of going to work I'm heading south to MK for a 90 minute session with the blond. Driving to MK I'm feeling disappointed with myself, saying "why am I doing this", "do I need this mental strain I'm putting myself through", "shall I call and cancel? - no I can't do that as I can't let the girl down by not showing up this close to the appointment, yes you can, no I can't" All of these thoughts keep going through my head.

So I call and confirm my booking and now I'm sat in the car park waiting for 11am trying to clear me head. Now its 11am, I'm at the door, then inside feeling relaxed, in the room and getting ready. In comes one gorgeous Brazilian blond babe and fantasy time has arrived, all of my guilty thoughts have gone.

90 fabulous minutes have passed I'm back in the car feeling great and on my way to work. What are my thoughts now? Not of guilt but what day shall I have my next punt. And in the evening I'm helping to sort out my wife's next family visit.

So fellow punters, what emotions do you go through when you set off for a punt, for the single guys it must be easy. How about you guys with wife's or partners, do you go through an emotional turmoil on your punting day.

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It all seems very familar to me.

"Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to decieve"

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I feel your pain, life's a real bitch at times.:(

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In comes one gorgeous Brazilian blond babe and fantasy time has arrived, all of my guilty thoughts have gone.

There is your answer, the more often and longer you punt the less time you will have for guilty thoughts.

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I'm still quite young and extremely new to punting. I'm also single with no children and there is one girl I am planning on meeting in about 2 weeks, so theoretically I shouldn't feel any guilt and should only be looking forward to the encounter.

But even though I am looking forward to meeting the girl (she is extremely attractive) for some reason I do feel bad, I do feel guilty. I don't know why. Maybe the feelings will eventually change nearer the time, but at the moment I, for sure, feel bad.

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I don't bother with the guilty thoughts stage. It saves time and hassle.

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I have probably some bad news for you.

Firstly the guilt in all likelihood wont go away you are not a bad person but you know you are doing something "wrong" be warned guilt is a kind of poison that will eat away at you and the way you engage in your relationship with your wife. You might develop an immunity to the guilt but at a cost in other areas.

Secondly the desire to punt probably wont go away. You seem to be very active and at what cost. Not just financial but in terms of anything else you should be doing/spending the money on. Fine if you are wealthy enough to throw money around and are totally sure the money is replaceable.

So you need to take stock and treat punting as a particularly rich treat. A reward to yourself from time to time. You know it isn't good for you but maybe sometimes you have really earned it.

Perhaps you should discuss more open lifestyles with your wife you never know your luck.

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The way i look at it. Is seeing WG's is a lot less hassle than having an actual affair.

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Two weeks ago my wife was away for the week visiting family and I took Monday off work and had a 90 minute punt and took Friday off for a 2 hour punt. A blond on Monday and a Brunette on Friday, absolutely wonderful with no feelings of guilt etc.

Yesterday, with my wife back, its back to deception and lies, getting up and getting ready to go to work, setting of from home with my wife kissing me goodbye and saying take care and its your favourite meal for dinner tonight.

So I drive away from home feeling guilty and a right bastard, as instead of going to work I'm heading south to MK for a 90 minute session with the blond. Driving to MK I'm feeling disappointed with myself, saying "why am I doing this", "do I need this mental strain I'm putting myself through", "shall I call and cancel? - no I can't do that as I can't let the girl down by not showing up this close to the appointment, yes you can, no I can't" All of these thoughts keep going through my head.

So I call and confirm my booking and now I'm sat in the car park waiting for 11am trying to clear me head. Now its 11am, I'm at the door, then inside feeling relaxed, in the room and getting ready. In comes one gorgeous Brazilian blond babe and fantasy time has arrived, all of my guilty thoughts have gone.

90 fabulous minutes have passed I'm back in the car feeling great and on my way to work. What are my thoughts now? Not of guilt but what day shall I have my next punt. And in the evening I'm helping to sort out my wife's next family visit.

So fellow punters, what emotions do you go through when you set off for a punt, for the single guys it must be easy. How about you guys with wife's or partners, do you go through an emotional turmoil on your punting day.

You'd feel a lot more guilty and miserable if you had an affair and/or left your wife.

Punting is actually keeping you sane and saving your marriage.

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You'd feel a lot more guilty and miserable if you had an affair and/or left your wife.

Punting is actually keeping you sane and saving your marriage.

Oh you make it sound like a true joy to be married (and near enough make it sound like you're doing your wife a favour)! Keep passing those "get out of jail free" cards. But who am I to judge?

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Oh you make it sound like a true joy to be married (and near enough make it sound like you're doing your wife a favour)! Keep passing those "get out of jail free" cards. But who am I to judge?

Aren't you just being a tiny, little bit hypocritical ?

After all, you see clients who are married men.

Go on then - stop seeing married men - and lose 70-80% of your income as a result.

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Aren't you just being a tiny, little bit hypocritical ?

After all, you see clients who are married men.

Go on then - stop seeing married men - and lose 70-80% of your income as a result.

Not at all. I am free and single and deceive no one.

In the "real" world, I would rather die (yes, that's how strongly I feel about lying and deception myself) than lie to or deceive someone I'm in a relationship with.

But I don't judge what someone else does with their life.

It simply struck me that you make it sound like a true joy to be married.

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Not at all. I am free and single and deceive no one.

In the "real" world, I would rather die (yes, that's how strongly I feel about lying and deception myself) than lie to or deceive someone I'm in a relationship with.

But I don't judge what someone else does with their life.

It simply struck me that you make it sound like a true joy to be married.

:D I agree justagirl :)

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You'd feel a lot more guilty and miserable if you had an affair and/or left your wife.

Could you explain this statement ?

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I feel excited before the punt with dash of nervousness. During the punt, I feel fine. Post punt I feel a little guilty for blowing £200 on the punt ...then the next week I go through the same. I think that's usual?

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You'd feel a lot more guilty and miserable if you had an affair and/or left your wife.

Punting is actually keeping you sane and saving your marriage.

You present it as though there is no other choice but there is, it's called fidelity.

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Oh you make it sound like a true joy to be married (and near enough make it sound like you're doing your wife a favour)

I wrote on another thread that punting has helped keep me sane.

This isn't to say that my marriage is what is driving me nuts, but that the fact of being married alone (after 20+ years) does not provide enough of an escape valve for all the other pressures in life, including raising children, and in my case running a small business in very difficult times.

Like may people, I have been prone to the dreaded "black dog" depression;the occasional punt provides some welcome escapism and light relief, and I usually return to my family not feeling guilty, but with more perspective and in a generally better mood (OK, sometimes I have to try really hard to wipe the smile off my face!)

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I don't think the ladies understand just how important sex is for a highly sexed man. It's not like having a cream cake when you are on a diet- a temporary lapse or a lack of will power. Men were put on this earth to "spread their seed" to have sex with as many women as possible. Highly sexed men really struggle with behaving well in a married relationship. Especially a married relationship with no sex at all. There are thousands of men over 40 and many under 40 in a lasting realtionship with a woman they love but the woman no longer has interest in sex with anyone ( not just their husband ). Add children into the mix and you may begin to appreciate how desperate some men feel and if they are sensitive how guilty. I have mentioned this to WGs with whom I have been a "regular" and they appreciate that they really are providing you with an essential service. The WG / Punter relationship is far more straightforward for the lady. There are no guilt issues and rarely any partner issues involved.

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Two weeks ago my wife was away for the week visiting family and I took Monday off work and had a 90 minute punt and took Friday off for a 2 hour punt. A blond on Monday and a Brunette on Friday, absolutely wonderful with no feelings of guilt etc.

Yesterday, with my wife back, its back to deception and lies, getting up and getting ready to go to work, setting of from home with my wife kissing me goodbye and saying take care and its your favourite meal for dinner tonight.

So I drive away from home feeling guilty and a right bastard, as instead of going to work I'm heading south to MK for a 90 minute session with the blond. Driving to MK I'm feeling disappointed with myself, saying "why am I doing this", "do I need this mental strain I'm putting myself through", "shall I call and cancel? - no I can't do that as I can't let the girl down by not showing up this close to the appointment, yes you can, no I can't" All of these thoughts keep going through my head.

So I call and confirm my booking and now I'm sat in the car park waiting for 11am trying to clear me head. Now its 11am, I'm at the door, then inside feeling relaxed, in the room and getting ready. In comes one gorgeous Brazilian blond babe and fantasy time has arrived, all of my guilty thoughts have gone.

90 fabulous minutes have passed I'm back in the car feeling great and on my way to work. What are my thoughts now? Not of guilt but what day shall I have my next punt. And in the evening I'm helping to sort out my wife's next family visit.

So fellow punters, what emotions do you go through when you set off for a punt, for the single guys it must be easy. How about you guys with wife's or partners, do you go through an emotional turmoil on your punting day.

The question is do you love your wife any less for having sex with other women? Is it possible to have one's own cake and eat it? This "hobby" is a big hit on the bank account as wells as on the emotions. It is probably better not to have got started, but once hooked it is damned hard to stop. If anything damage limitation is the key, probably involving rationing of visits.

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Two weeks ago my wife was away for the week visiting family and I took Monday off work and had a 90 minute punt and took Friday off for a 2 hour punt. A blond on Monday and a Brunette on Friday, absolutely wonderful with no feelings of guilt etc.

Yesterday, with my wife back, its back to deception and lies, getting up and getting ready to go to work, setting of from home with my wife kissing me goodbye and saying take care and its your favourite meal for dinner tonight.

So I drive away from home feeling guilty and a right bastard, as instead of going to work I'm heading south to MK for a 90 minute session with the blond. Driving to MK I'm feeling disappointed with myself, saying "why am I doing this", "do I need this mental strain I'm putting myself through", "shall I call and cancel? - no I can't do that as I can't let the girl down by not showing up this close to the appointment, yes you can, no I can't" All of these thoughts keep going through my head.

So I call and confirm my booking and now I'm sat in the car park waiting for 11am trying to clear me head. Now its 11am, I'm at the door, then inside feeling relaxed, in the room and getting ready. In comes one gorgeous Brazilian blond babe and fantasy time has arrived, all of my guilty thoughts have gone.

90 fabulous minutes have passed I'm back in the car feeling great and on my way to work. What are my thoughts now? Not of guilt but what day shall I have my next punt. And in the evening I'm helping to sort out my wife's next family visit.

So fellow punters, what emotions do you go through when you set off for a punt, for the single guys it must be easy. How about you guys with wife's or partners, do you go through an emotional turmoil on your punting day.

No emotional turmoil or guilt. I have punted where my partner has known and joined in and behind others backs. I require sex with various ladies and dont want to stick to one lady however much i love her. I punt for sex and no strings attached. If i felt bad about it i wouldnt do it as i wouldnt be enjoying it, and punting for me is mostly about having fun.

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I don't think the ladies understand just how important sex is for a highly sexed man. It's not like having a cream cake when you are on a diet- a temporary lapse or a lack of will power. Men were put on this earth to "spread their seed" to have sex with as many women as possible. Highly sexed men really struggle with behaving well in a married relationship.

What an utterly condescending comment which smacks of pompousness. There: let me pass you another "get out of jail free card".

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Its such crap to blame sex drive on visiting punters. Rarely a man might end up with a frigid wife. Rarely that can also be true for a wife with a frigid/impotent husband.

Simple answer is if you have a high sex drive and are in a relationship where that is not being answered discuss it and decide either it is possible within the relationship, it isn't possible but that a more open relationship where an escort or fuck buddy would be acceptable or end the relationship.

Sometimes it seems "highly sexed" men have no balls.

(Yes I am saying this having been right through all the possibilities and mistakes myself)

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What an utterly condescending comment which smacks of pompousness. There: let me pass you another "get out of jail free card".

You can't know what it is like to be a man and have testosterone coarsing round your veins. I didn't read the comment as condescending.

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You can't know what it is like to be a man and have testosterone coarsing round your veins. I didn't read the comment as condescending.

Justagirl, you're spot on and the majority of men would agree with you that there is no 'need' to visit prostitutes, hence the fact they don't.

I know what it's like to have testosterone flowing around me (I've too much of the bloody stuff), and it's easily cured with a good old-fashioned wank. Easily. The 'need' to cheat on a wife is a desire, not an actual need.

But I had a wank and I'm horny again? Have another one. Repeat until your drained dry.

The OP feels guilt because he's behaving like an arsehole behind his wife's back and he knows it. He is, quite simply, a shit husband, at least in terms of fidelity. And again, he knows it. Hence the emotional turmoil. He knows he could have had a wank but chose to cheat on his wife with a prostitute instead.

There's a realistic chance your wife will eventually catch you out, then you'll probably be on here feeling sorry for yourself again. I just hope she finds someone more honest next time around, or that you realise that it might not be worth losing her for an hour with Becky of Beckenham.

Lamorak, I really don't think for a second I'm telling you anything you don't already know, but I find it hard to read the almost sociopathic rationales dished out by others on this thread. I think you were hoping for someone to be able to tell you how to make the guilt go away, but having more respect for your wife is in all likelihood the only solution.

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You can't know what it is like to be a man and have testosterone coarsing round your veins. I didn't read the comment as condescending.

Women have not only testosterone but bloody loads of progesterone and oestrogen flooding through the veins. Please don't think I would have no idea what it was like to be sexually frustrated, it took until I was 31 until I met a man who would put the effort into getting me to reach my first orgasm that wasn't induced by myself.

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