Review of Lara Brooks of Lara Brooks, Stourbridge

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No apologies for second FR on Lara, this was a fourth time and I don?t even feel slightly tempted to move elsewhere. The point of Field Reports is to recommend, isn?t it?

For centuries, philosophers and mathematicians have pondered the question of time.

Me, too. After three evening meetings with Lara, each one of four hours including dinner and champagne, I needed to know the answer to the eternal question about time: if four hours with Lara leaves you wanting more, then how can two hours be any use at all? Conversely, if two hours is enough, then why would you want to pay for four?

The results of basic research by dedicated researchers must be published, for the benefit of mankind.

Lara makes appointments of a minimum of two hours and thus shows great compassion as anything less than two hours would surely have her brought up in the courts for extreme cruelty to males.

The difference between a four hour meeting and one of two hours is basically - dinner, but dinner isn?t just a meal, it is quality time with a beautiful woman (one who can eat half a large Tarte Tatin at a sitting ? a reliable gauge to her appetites), and the conversations are wide-ranging and interesting, pleasurable and tactile. Time flies, and for the last hour or so, we move to more comfortable surroundings and from a culinary to a musical experience. Lara understands that while this critical part of a meeting may be taken fortissimo, it is much more effective if taken at the same time lento, rather than presto, though a final crescendo is guaranteed (maybe even crescendi).

So what of a two hour meeting? Is there any point?

Good grief, yes! We chose daytime for a first two hour meeting and had tea and cake and a short conversation to start, rather than a meal, which left maximum time for the musical variations, and there are so many of those. Suffice to say, there is NEVER ever the need to proclaim, as did conductor Sir Thomas Beecham to a lady cellist: ?you have a wonderful instrument between your legs and all you can do is scratch it?.

What it boils down to is this: do you want a slow romantic evening, or something shorter but equally enjoyable?

The answer has to be ? YES! To both!

Sometimes, four hours is going to be just the thing; other times ? well, two hours is magic as well. And there?s less crockery to wash up!

To be serious, Lara is very special. Treat her that way and however long you?re with her, you are sure to enjoy the experience.