No. 110078 - Published 30 Jul 2012
Review of Natasha of London
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Take a moment, friends. When you think the chill wind of recession is getting close to your door, just thank your lucky stars that you don?t live in West Croydon. Of all the crap towns it has been my pleasure to entertain ? and I have been to both Hull and Wolverhampton ? West Croydon has to be the most crap. And the house in which the charming Natasha is currently plying her trade is no stranger to crapness. Indeed if it were burgled, burgled again and then partially burnt down, I suspect no one would really notice. No hot water. Shit bed. Unsafe stairs. Bathroom floor tiles scattered loosely on the floor. Etcetera. But I felt entirely safe and indeed very anonymous both on approach and exit, which I like.
Her photos on */* have been extravagantly touched up, but she is cute in a solid, nut brown, Eastern European sort of way (though she claims to be Italian). Lovely pert little boobs. Very short. I don?t quite get the fuss evident in the */* feedback ? where she goes by the name of ?Full Contact? - but what do I know.
All the stuff about West Croydon is is incidental to the task in hand, which is to review Natasha?s performance. I shall start thusly:
After a rather sketchy text exchange the previous day, I arrived on Natasha?s patch 15 mins early and headed into a surprisingly nice pub on the London road. 45 minutes and two pints of Guinness later, I was telling myself that what I really like about punting is the anticipation of the sex act rather than the doing, and also that I really like to drink Guinness in the morning in lieu of breakfast, and that it looked as if I was going to save myself ?120. Then Natasha turned on her phone. (my point here being ? if you do decide to book her, expect some coms problems)
She told me ? if I understood her correctly ? that she is only at this location for a few days having moved from Kingston, before relocating to central London, where (let?s face it) all the best WG?s hang out. Is she one of the best? Not really. Natasha is diminutive, nicely put together and has a good line in banter, which quickly turned me on ? I was rock hard in seconds, which doesn?t happen all that often. But she needs to be a little bit more ?up for it? to get the gold star in my book. Bit less prosaic. And don?t advertise DT/FK etc if you are not going to offer it. And don?t hustle me too quickly down the road to orgasm when I have paid for an hour. But then again I?d f**k her again at the drop of a hat, which is the acid test. I think she is the classic ??100 All Services Included a Tidy Shag? that */* is so good at providing. So I suppose I think she is a bit overpriced. Not sure if the anal was included ? I didn?t fancy it. I came all over her face and boobs at the end. Very sexy.
There was an extraordinary moment at the start when Natasha pointed at a dumpy young lady standing in the kitchen, dressed in ill-fitting leisure wear, and indicated she would be happy to join us for a m?nage. I'm afraid I am strangely drawn to the ?prozzie? side of punting (I?d love to experience a street walker. Sorry. Spectacularly un-PC) but the kitchen lady would have been a step too far.
I?ve just noticed that I have had a run of Natasha reviews recently on PN. If I was asked to rank them, it would go:
1 Natasha ?Pink Cupcakes?
2 = Natasha ?Bethnal Green Bum Fun?/Natasha ?West Croydon Hovel?
(With the first one so far ahead that she is not really in the same ball park)
At the end I got lost going back into central London. Bloody Croydon. The rioters should have finished the job last summer.
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