No. 94051 - Published 4 Nov 2009
Review of Valerie of Milton Keynes
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A lovely 2 bedroom flat in a building that I?ve passed countless times without realising that the treasures are kept above ground rather than below it. 4 levels up to be precise.
Long, dark hair with eyes that cut through you like a Nesmuk knife through butter and a figure that would have heads turning and tongues wagging even if she covered it in a horrible kaftan. Oh, and it?s also worth mentioning that she also has a radiant smile that would come in handy during a power cut.
I stepped out of the car nervously and watched as a waterfall of sweat dripped from my palms as I shut the door behind me. The pounding of my heart was causing Jurassic Park-like shivers through my body and upstairs, my mind was racing with the thought that had kept me preoccupied throughout the 4 mile journey to the location ? did I remember to set the timer on the washing machine?
It was then when a gust of wind blew past and knocked my jacket collar, slapping me on my face with it as if a Divine entity (no pun intended) was knocking some sense into me for worrying about the unimportant things in life when I was about to meet the lovely Valerie!
I knocked on the door and was greeted by Valerie (fresh out of the shower!) who then showed me into a room while she changed into something ?more appropriate?. I made myself comfortable while flicking through the pages of the August issue of Esquire (the one with Elijah Wood on the cover) and then she walked in again, looking every bit the Slovakian princess that she is.
Things started off slow with a lot of fondling and kissing both ways and we then moved onto 69 and eventually finished with her bouncing up and down on me. Once that was over we chatted for a while and the while turned into a longer while as we gossiped like teenage girls who have just read Heat. (I don?t actually know what teenage girls who have just read Heat do, I just felt it was the most appropriate description)
Oh, for those of you interested, I did remember to set the timer correctly.
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