No. 96557 - Published 14 Mar 2010
Review of Paula of Central London
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Ah, Kiss Kiss. ?How do I love thee? Let me count the ways?? Well, one of the ways usually involves a lot of top quality Rumpy Pumpy. Obviously. Is it sacrilege to work the Bard into a PN review? How about I try to stay highbrow with a Haiku:
'All roads lead this way
For ladies of the night time
Kiss Kiss reigns supreme'
I was going to try and work in ?Saskia?, who runs the joint, but it has too many syllables. And anyway, she wasn?t on duty tonight ? the improbably named Chardonnay made for a worthy deputy. Far too many syllables to even attempt to work her in. Though I?d quite like to ?work her in?. No alchohol on offer during this visit - but i'm not one to hold a grudge.
Paula is a friendly, confident, smiley sort, I reckon a size 9 not an 8, if such a size exists. Nice, pert boobs. Wearing a knock out little black dress. And ? she subsequently revealed - nothing else. Hurray!
Very accommodating and very naughty. She might become my ?bit on the side? at KK, when the ?Main Event? is not working (She knows who she is). Not sure how a ?bit on the side? works in a brothel. Might I have to sneak in through the back entrance? Wear a false beard? That?s the answer ? and i've thought for a long time that there?s not enough false beards in the world these days.
I shall give Paula a solid ?B++? in my brand new working girl scoring system. (How does this system work? Well, I once got an A+++ for a history essay ? I guess the teacher was a wanabee kiddy fiddler, and was trying to butter me up. But I was a very pretty boy?) She gets marked down for charging me ?20 extra for kissing, which is too much. And ?cos she ain?t the ?Main Event?. But all in all, it was pretty fine slap and tickle all round.
If anyone has bothered to read to the end of this rubbish ? here?s another one:
Marcel barks after
The shower hits my tired form
Then to Elysium
I guess you have to go there to know what this means. And for the purists, I accept that ?tired? probably has two syllables....
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