Review of Lora of Slough

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What a shithole. Surly looking dude answered the door without a word and just signalled me to go into the waiting room. Two ladies appeared and I thought I had come to the wrong place. Nothing whatsover resembling the pictures of Sanjeet and Lora on the Desire website, the former was about 5 feet high and almost as wide, so I took the other one who called herself Lora but couldn't be more different to the Lora on the web site. At least she was reasonably slim.

This Lora is poles apart from the Lora on the web site which I thought I was going to see. Very plain and unsmiling face, and definitely not Italian despite her assurances. I've been to Italy and Romania many times, and know both accents very well, and this girl looked and sounded as Romanian as you can get. She did not smile once from the initial greeting until I left, in fact she looked downright miserable the entire time. Her body was just OK, nothing to write home about, and definitely not as sexy as the Lora on the web page.

This is where it got a whole lot worse. After paying £100 for an hour, and looking forward to the "warm" and "friendly" reception promised on the web page, I went upstairs and was shown into a room that was entirely bare except for a double bed with a cover that did not look (or smell) particularly clean. After putting a small towel down on the bed, "Lora" said "massage" at which point I suggested that she lie down and let me massage her. She promptly lay down with her bra and panties on, so I asked her to remove them, at which point she suddenly could no longer speak English and look blankly at me, shaking her head. So I explained in sign language and slow speech, and she took off her bra only. More explaining and sign language and a lot of cajoling later, she reluctantly removed her panties. Now, I am trained in deep tissue and swedish massage and know that I give a damn good massage, however I had barely done her neck and shoulders and she sat up and said "you massage", and resisted any attempt from me to continue massaging her. So I lay face down and was subjected to five minutes of having my back prodded and pushed like I was a slab of meat being tenderised. Then she said "blowjob" and stood up to get a condom. I asked her to continue with the massage down my butt and legs and she bluntly replied "no, blowjob only". She then refused to do oral without and slapped a condom on my limp dick which ordinarily would have been as hard as a rock by then, but this whole experience was already akin to pouring ice cold water on me old fella. I was then subjected to a very poor and cursory attempt at a blowjob for probably three minutes, during which she would not let me touch her pussy or go anywhere near it with my hands, and then when I was about half mast she said "sex" and climbed on top of me. Suffice to say I struggled through around 10 minutes of determinedly fucking her cowgirl, doggy and missionary, but the sight of her sour face looking silently at the ceiling during the final missionary position was enough to dampen anyone's enthusiasm, so I promptly called it quits, dressed and left.

In short, the singularly worst experience with a working girl in my twenty years of philandering! Despite the assurances on the website that Lora "provides most services" this particular "Lora" does not:

- do oral without
- allow any form of kissing on her body or lips
- allow reverse oral
- allow touching of her pussy or ass
- smile
- make any effort whatsover
- speak English (or pretends not to)
- kiss or touch the client's nipples or body
- massage more than neck and shoulders (if you can even call it massage).

Spend your good Pounds elsewhere fellas, this bitch is the worst, and has an awful lot to learn about good service!